My Complicated Crush
by Anya0901
Summary: "Vanitas, please stop!" I looked at him with pleading eyes. "We can't do this… This is wrong!" Vanitas pinned me on the floor and is only inches away from my face. I can smell whiskey off his breath. He is staring at me with his piercing yellow eyes and they are hypnotizing me. We both are pretty intoxicated and things between us are escalating quickly Vanitas X OC ( Cagalli )
1. Chapter 1 - His Poison Mixed Drinks

Chapter 1

The Bad Boy Roommate & His Poison Mixed Drinks

"UGH! NO! NO! NO!" I screamed at my laptop screen where my English paper was SUPPOSE to be, but I accidentally erased it. I don't even know how I did it… IT HAPPENED SO FAST! The paper is due in three hours… What the hell am I going to do now?!

My roommate's Rottweiler is lying next to me on the couch and he tilted his head in confusion, but he immediately tried to go on my lap to comfort me.

"Killer, please don't! I have to rewrite my paper." I scowled at him as he kept tempting to lie on top of me, but I kept pushing him away.

I love Killer because he only likes my roommate and me; Killer hates everyone else, and he ALWAYS tries to attack them, but my roommate, Vanitas, doesn't hesitate to stop him. He's dangerous, but very cuddly especially towards me! I cuddle with him every night and when I watch TV. I feel bad because I know he wants to cuddle now, but I have to focus!

As I started to rub my temples in frustration, I heard the front door opening.

"Hey, Cagalli." Vanitas greeted me as he shut the door behind him.

I didn't look up from my computer screen. "Hi." I bluntly greeted back.

"Someone's in a bad mood." He mocked as he pushed Killer off the couch so he can sit next to me. "Maybe this will help." He held an iced coffee in front of my screen.

I immediately grabbed it. "Ugh, thank god! I need this!" I started to take big sips from the straw. "You remembered my flavor!"

"Well, yeah. You always get mocha. How can I forget? I knew you for how many years now?"

"Six!"

My name is Cagalli Range, I am nineteen-years-old and I am a sophomore in college! I am Vanitas' roommate and we have been best friends ever since high school.

Vanitas is only two years older than me, but he treats me like a little child. He often teases me a lot, which annoys the hell out of me, but he means well.

Vanitas is a definition of a bad boy that everyone idolized including me! I have a HUGE crush on him ever since I laid eyes on him. We became more than friends after he graduated high school and I was a junior at the time. We didn't date, but we hooked up A LOT.

Vanitas often ignores my feelings and he can be quite heartless, but no matter how mad I get, I can't stay away from him. He has a sweet side too, though. Whenever I need something he doesn't hesitate to help out.

I just wished we had that extra spark like we did in high school, but it is long gone. We do not hook up anymore and I am okay with that because our friendship means more to me than our lustful thoughts.

"So, why are you in a bad mood?" Vanitas asked.

"I accidentally erased my paper that is due in three hours! I don't know what to do!"

"Skip. That's what I do."

"Even if I do skip, my professor is still going to mark my paper late and drop a letter grade…"

Vanitas shrugged. I can tell he is bored with the conversation. Vanitas doesn't care much about school. I am surprised he is still in school, to be honest.

He's a senior and is going to graduate on time. I, on the other hand, am struggling hardcore and this is only my second year! I'm not very smart, but I hardly try… I usually do things last minute, and I am defiantly a definition of a procrastinator! I think if I did things early then I would get better grades, but it's easy said than done!

I turned my head to see Vanitas staring at me and I felt very uncomfortable. "What?!"

"Nothing." He didn't take his eyes off me.

"Why are you staring at me like that?!"

Vanitas leaned closer to my face as he kept his eyes on me. His pupils are yellow and they are the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.

I think I am in love with them because they are unique and very bright.

I felt my face getting hot as he kept leaning in. Our foreheads are touching and we locked eyes. He is so close that I can smell tobacco on his clothes.

"Um, do you mind?! I have to finish this paper!" I lost my cool, which is no surprise there. I never can keep my cool around him especially when he teases me like this all the time!

Vanitas just smirked and slowly rose up from the couch and stretched. "I'm going to take a nap since I didn't get much sleep last night. I'll see you later. Good luck on your paper."

"You're going to skip your classes again?!" I asked annoyingly. I know for a fact, he was up all night partying with his friends!

"Yep," he answered casually as he started to walk away from me…

I watched my crush as he lazily walked up the stairs. It's strange that I moved in with him, but he asked me after I moved out of the dorms last year. His question stunned me at first, but we have been so close over the years that I didn't think it would be a bad idea to live with him.

It has only been a couple months since we lived together, and it's never been a dull moment. I still have mad feelings for Vanitas, but I try and bottle them up, so there's no tension between the two of us.

As I was lost in thought, Killer hurried and jumped back on the couch to lie by me again. He rested his head on my thigh, as I am staring at my blank screen, thinking about the bad boy sleeping in his bed, peacefully.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is hard for me to keep my eyes open as my English professor is lecturing the class, but I wasn't going to complain because I finished rewriting my English paper!

I felt my phone vibrate on my lap, I lazily viewed my text and it was my best friend Kairi!

 **Kairi: Hey, what are you doing tonight?**

 **Me: Nothing, why?**

 **Kairi: Want to go to a party with Sora and me?**

I frowned. I love hanging with Kairi and Sora, but I always feel like the third wheel! Kairi and Sora are high school sweethearts, and I met Kairi last year through Vanitas because Sora is Vanitas' cousin. Kairi is full of energy and she is very outgoing, one of the reasons why I love her. I sighed as I replied to her.

 **Me: Ugh, fine but you know I hate being the third wheel…**

 **Kairi: Don't worry, there're going to be a lot of boys at this party! It will be fun.**

 **Me: Kay.**

 **Kairi: Trust me.**

I rolled my eyes at the last text and put my phone away. I do like parties, but not the parties at this school. I'm not really close to any of the students here because they aren't really friendly.

I kind of curse myself for coming to this college, but what can I do?

I kept eyeing the clock, praying that my one and only class for today will just be over!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am back at the apartment trying to find something to eat. I don't know what I am in a mood for, but all I know is that I am starving and I am about to have a mental breakdown!

"Cagalli?" Vanitas came in the kitchen and laughed as I am looking in the fridge.

"What?! I'm hungry! Nothing funny about that at all!" Vanitas can read me like an open book. He knew how to get under my skin.

"I got you something that you are going to like," he hummed.

I turned around and he had a Chipotle brown bag in his hand. I freaked out immediately! Chipotle is my favorite restaurant in the whole wide world!

"Please tell me you aren't joking?" I asked, pleadingly.

Vanitas always buys me food, but sometimes he'll get my hopes up and say it is mine then he'll change his mind and say it is all for himself. He THEN will eat the food right in front of me!

"I'm not joking." He handed me the bag and I squealed. I rushed into the dining room just in case he tries to take it back!

I sat down and dug in the bag to find a burrito wrapped in tin foil. My mouth began to water as I slowly unwrapped the tin foil off my big fat burrito.

I took a big bite and moaned happily. He not only knows what kinds of flavor I like in my ice coffees, but he knows what I like in my Chipotle burrito. I love the grilled chicken with brown rice and black beans! I also get diced tomatoes with shredded cheese and guacamole.

I am truly in heaven right now!

Vanitas smirked as he sat across from me. He stared at me while I am devouring my burrito. "Damn, you really are hungry, huh? You're such a little pig."

I scowled at him. "Shut up, it's really good!" I whined with my mouth full of food.

He just grinned at me. I love it when he smiles at me. He has nice perfect teeth and they are always pearly white; I don't get how, though, he smokes so many cigarettes and vape pens, I'm surprised his teeth aren't yellow and gross.

I studied him, as he is texting on his phone. His hair is jet black and spiky. He has his tongue pierced and two diamond holes on each side of his ears. He also has a tattoo on his wrist that looks like two axes that form into a heart. It is just outlined and it is black.

Vanitas is what any girl would dream of in a bad boy. He has the looks and the personality.

"I know I'm charming looking, but can you please stop staring at me," he said, as he is still texting on his phone.

"I'm not staring at you!" I lied.

"Don't lie. You know you can't resist me," he looked up and gave me a seductive look.

I finished the rest of my burrito and rolled my eyes. "Quit teasing me."

He just laughed softly. "Sorry, I can't help it… It's fun to watch you get all flustered and nervous around me."

"Whatever." I grabbed my garbage and went into the kitchen to throw it away.

Vanitas followed behind me. "Hey, if Eva asked where I was last night can you please cover for me and say I was with Sora?"

I turned around and folded my arms over my chest. "I told you before I don't want anything to do with your personal life. You already know I don't approve of what you do, and I told you that I am staying out of it! I won't tell on you for seeing another girl, but I will not cover for you either."

Eva is Vanitas' girlfriend, but he cheats on her every night with two other girls. He goes back and forth between the three. Eva knows he cheats on her multiple times, and they fight about it daily, but she will not break up with him because she thinks she can change him.

Eva doesn't like me living with Vanitas even though he always tells her there's nothing to worry about, and what we used to have is in the past, but it still bothers her.

I don't blame her though I would be upset if I had a boyfriend that lived with another girl. I asked Vanitas why he doesn't want to live with his girlfriend, and he told me it was because he can get away with cheating.

I tried to get used to him doing what he does, but it kills me every time he comes back bright and early after being with one of the girls…

"Come on, Cagalli! I got you an iced coffee and a burrito."

My eyes widened. Is that why he was buying me food, so I would cover for him? Wow, I can't believe I didn't realize he was bribing me with food!

He sometimes does that, but not all the time... Ugh, I feel so stupid. "If I knew you were bribing me with food then I would've not accepted it…"

"Please," he begged coolly.

I knew he wasn't going to let this go so I just huffed. "Fine, but this is the last time…"

"You said that last week," he joked.

"I mean it THIS time!" I stormed off to go into my room to find an outfit to wear tonight. I really wasn't looking forward to going out, but I knew Kairi would be mad if I didn't come…

I started to look through my closet; I hate picking out outfits, it is so hard and stressful for me!

While I am throwing my clothes all over the floor, Vanitas came in and sat down on my bed. He is on the phone with his girlfriend.

"Yeah, baby… I was with my cousin last night… We just chilled and watched a couple of movies. That's all… Yeah, I'm not doing anything tonight, but I rather just be alone if that is okay?" He tried to sound cutesy with his girlfriend, which made me feel sick to my stomach. Can't he talk to her in his OWN room?

He said a couple more things then he hung up his phone.

I am still struggling on what to wear… It is still warm out even though it is fall, so maybe I should wear a dress?

"What are you doing tonight?" Vanitas asked.

"Kairi wanted me to go with her and your cousin to a party, that's all," I answered as I am still looking through my closet.

"Since when do you party during the week?"

He got me there. I NEVER party during the week only on the weekends. Today is only Tuesday and I have three classes to go to tomorrow. I am defiantly not staying out all night, or getting drunk.

The most I'll get is a little tipsy and that is all! Knowing Kairi, though, she'll make me chug drinks and take shots with her.

"I don't really want to go, but I don't want Kairi mad at me, you know?" I pulled a tight fitting red dress out from the closet.

Vanitas eyed the dress that I am holding. "Trying to find a man, huh?"

"No?" Why would he ask that?

"Well, you are dressing all sexy, so I just figured. I don't know." He shrugged.

"Just because a girl dresses sexy doesn't mean she is trying to find a boyfriend. We all just want to look cute and feel good about ourselves." I held the dress up to examine it.

The dress is dark red and it is strapless. The dress also cut very low in the front so my chest would be exposed even though I have small breasts.

I think this will be perfect for tonight, and I will wear nude heels. My nude heels are very different because they lace up all the way to my ankles.

"So, where's the party at?" Vanitas asked curiously. He now is lying on my bed.

I gave him a dirty look and put my hands on my hips. "SHOES OFF MY BED!"

He snorted as he kicked his black boots off his feet. The boots fell on the ground with a loud thump. "So, where's the party at?" He asked again.

"I don't know… I don't even know where we are going to pregame at…"

"Why don't I buy a couple of bottles and you can pregame here. I'll drink a little bit with you guys," Vanitas suggested.

"Um, okay. That would be fine. I'll text Kairi about it."

"Cool. What type of alcohol should I get?

I thought for a moment. "How about vodka… Oh! Sora and I LOVE that whiskey stuff. What is it called? Fire… Water?"

Vanitas started to bust out laughing. "FIREBALL! Not Fire Water…"

I felt my cheeks turning red. "Ugh, whatever… You know what I mean!"

"Fire… Water." He kept saying it over and over again.

"Okay, okay!" I huffed. "That is enough…"

Vanitas got up from my bed and stretched. "I'll get the alcohol now… I'll pick up two Fire Waters." He chuckled as he left my room.

I rolled my eyes, as I am texting Kairi on my phone about pre-gaming here.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is around eight o' clock at night and I decided to get ready. I am doing my makeup carefully. It usually takes me fifteen minutes to do my makeup because I only put on eye makeup and nothing else. My hair is a different story, though. It is so long and thick that it takes me forever to even style it!

As I am applying mascara on my eyelashes, Kairi came walking in. She ALWAYS is ready early!

"Hey, Kai!" I greeted, not taking my eyes off my mirror.

"Hey, girl!" She sat on my bed. "Vanitas bought A LOT of bottles! We are defiantly taking advantage of that!"

"Ugh, if he bought a lot, I bet him and his friends are going out too."

"I don't think so. He told me his girlfriend was supposed to come over for a little bit. He sounded annoyed about it because he told me he just wanted to chill tonight by himself."

"Yeah," I answered. I didn't want to keep talking about his girlfriend. It always puts me in a bad mood, especially when I am about to go out.

Kairi and Sora both know about my little crush on Vanitas. Sora tries to hook me up with someone else because he knows Vanitas is no good for me while Kairi supports and encourages me to like him.

"You only did your makeup! Geez, Cagalli, we have to pregame soon!" Kairi whined.

I turned around to glare at her. "Well, go downstairs and pregame. I'll be done in about thirty minutes."

Kairi huffed as she slowly stood up from my bed. "Fine! Thirty minutes, that is it!"

I watched her walk out of my room and she looked REALLY pretty! She wore a sexy black dress that is low in the back and tall black heels.

Kairi always knew how to dress for parties and fun events.

As I heard her loud voice from downstairs, I plugged in my straightener so I can hurry and do my hair. While I stared at my straightener, I thought about how this night is going to turn out… I just hope things don't get too crazy for us.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Thirty minutes has passed and I am finally ready! I walked downstairs and saw Vanitas, his friend, Axel, his other friend, Seifer, Kairi, Sora, and Eva. They all looked at me as I slowly walked downstairs. I tried desperately not to fall down the stairs because of the nude heels. They are so hard to walk in!

"FINALLY!" Kairi grinned at me.

"Hey everyone." I greeted as I walked up to them.

"Here you are." Vanitas handed me a mixed drink.

"Is it strong?" I sniffed and immediately gagged.

"Why are you trying to get your roommate drunk?" Eva hissed at her boyfriend.

"Hey, she needs to loosen up. She's always uptight." Vanitas laughed.

"Am not!" I took a small sip and shivered. He mixed Fireball and coke together, but all I taste is the Fireball.

"So, how was last night, Sora?" Eva asked Sora, ignoring her boyfriend's and I's little bickering fight.

"Um, it was good," Sora muttered as he took a big gulp of his drink. I know for a fact Vanitas texted Sora to cover for him too!

"He was at Sora's right, Cagalli?" Eva looked at me with cold eyes. Geez, if she has a hunch that her boyfriend is cheating on her then ask him questions, not Sora and I.

"Yeah. He was with Sora," I answered as I tried to gulp this mixed drink down my throat. It tastes like poison…

"Okay, good!" Eva wrapped her arms around Vanitas' waist.

Vanitas didn't show any reaction all he did is chug his drink.

"Yo, so are you three walking to the party?" Axel asked Kairi, Sora and me.

"Yeah," Kairi answered. "Do you want to come? It isn't just going to be sophomores there, but juniors and seniors too."

"Yeah, I have nothing better to do since Vanitas and Eva are staying here tonight," Axel said.

Like Vanitas, Axel and Seifer are also seniors. Eva is a junior, and Sora and Kairi are sophomores like me. I don't know what Kairi, Sora and I are going to do when Axel, Vanitas, and Seifer graduate. We always try not to think about it, but it haunts our minds all the time.

"I'm coming too!" Seifer chimed in. "I'm going to get trashed!"

"Me too!" Kairi cheered.

Sora glared at his high school sweetheart. "That is dangerous, Kai."

"Sora, you ALWAYS take care of her, so she will be fine," I said as I choked on my last remaining drink. I hate finishing an alcoholic beverage. It's all alcohol at the bottom!

"Yeah, Sora always takes care of me." Kairi bragged.

"Awe, I wish my boyfriend would take care of me when I am drunk." Eva gave Vanitas an evil look.

"I don't take care of anybody when they're drunk. People should know their limit, if you don't, then that is on you." Vanitas mixed another drink and handed it to me. "Drink some more!"

"Is this as strong as the first one?" I took a little sip and spit it back in the cup. "EW, IT IS WORSE!"

"Drink up," Vanitas smirked.

I rolled my eyes as I started to drink it. I forced myself not to gag on how bad it tasted.

"Vanitas, you should make me a drink!" Eva whined.

"Your cup is already full," Vanitas muttered.

Eva just frowned at her boyfriend. I'm not really a big fan of her because she always wants Vanitas to kiss her ass on everything she does or says. She also wants him to do things for her, and she gets testy if he does something little for me.

I knew him for six years and she only knew him for two years! Give us a break… She is really gorgeous, though. She has long black hair and she has pale skin. She has her lip pierced and a couple small tattoos, one on her ankle, and one on the side of her stomach. She has a seductive look to herself and I mean it in a good way! Must be nice to look sexy all the time without trying.

"CAGALLI, WE SHOULD DO A SHOT!" Kairi wrapped her arms around my waist.

"Now? This drink itself is like a big shot…" I REALLY didn't want to take a shot. I am already feeling a little lightheaded.

"PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE! Kairi begged like a little kid.

"Fine, but I need a chaser," I said.

"Use the mixed drink I made for you," Vanitas suggested.

"No," I whined.

"Baby." He chuckled as he went into the kitchen to get soda for Kairi and me.

"I want to do a shot too!" Axel shouted.

"Me too!" Seifer said.

"I guess I will too," Sora muttered.

Vanitas came back and brought us Sprite and Coke. Kairi and I immediately poured ourselves our chasers in empty glasses while the boys poured all of us alcohol in shot glasses.

Everyone grabbed a shot glass besides Eva, which shocked me because she usually drinks when Vanitas drinks, but maybe she wasn't feeling it.

"What should we cheer's to?" Seifer asked.

"For an epic night!" Axel said.

"I like that!" Kairi commented.

We all clanged our shot glasses together and chanted "For an epic night!" We all then downed our shots.

"The first one is always the worst." I set my empty shot glass on the table.

"I agree!" Kairi said.

"We should do three more then head out." Axel poured himself alcohol in his shot glass.

"Well, my plans to just getting tipsy failed," I sighed as I poured alcohol in my shot glass too.

"Oh, hush! You love being drunk!" Kairi punched my arm lightly.

I gulped my shot and laughed. "Sometimes!"

We all did as Axel suggested and took three more shots, well, besides, Eva. She just watched us carefully, but after we took our shots we all drank a couple more mixed drinks then decided to head to the house party. We all said our goodbyes to Vanitas and Eva and started to walk outside.

"Have fun, guys!" Eva called out from behind us.

"Thanks!" We all said in unison.

I am not going to lie, but I am feeling a little drunk, and I know Kairi is going to make me drink more once we get to this house party, but I am excited for tonight as long as I have my friends by my side.


	2. Chapter 2 - Love Inside This Madness

Chapter 2

There Is Love Inside This Madness

 *** " Though I don't believe in magic, I believe in me and you. " - Bea Miller:** ** _Fire N Gold_**

We are finally at the house party, but I felt EXTREMELY uncomfortable. There are WAY too many people at this house. It is hard for my friends and me to move around because we keep bumping into people so we decided to stand by a corner in the living room.

Axel and Sora are the only ones who didn't act drunk as for the rest of us… Well, it is a different story.

The alcohol we drank at my apartment finally kicked in for us. Kairi is all over Sora and he had to support her because she couldn't stand straight, and Seifer had his right arm wrapped around my waist, making me lean into him. He does this to me every time he gets drunk and it gets annoying at times…

Seifer is good looking and he is somewhat my type it's just strange how he only flirts with me when he is drinking.

When he's sober he hardly talks to me, but even if he did give me the time or the day, I wouldn't like him like that.

Seifer has short blonde hair, and he always wears a black beanie. He has a lot of arm muscles and abs, but he is still very thin. He works out religiously to stay in shape. I don't feel that extra spark with him like I do with Vanitas, but Vanitas is an asshole compared to Seifer…

"Hey, Cagalli you look really sexy in that little red dress of yours." Seifer leaned in and whispered to me. His words are making me cringe from feeling his hot breath in my ear.

"Ugh, thanks…" I tried to struggle away from his body, but he had a tight grip on me.

"Vanitas isn't going to like you being all over her," Axel warned Seifer as he took a sip from his red cup.

My heart started to pound in my chest very fast. "Wait, what?" I tried my best not to show how happy I am to hear that.

Vanitas is NOT the jealous type at all. Eva and the other two girls he hooks up with will get a lot of attention from guys because they are very attractive looking, but Vanitas doesn't worry or care if a guy flirts with them.

Axel tells me sometimes the boys will flirt with them in front of him, and Vanitas doesn't show any reaction that he is jealous or mad.

"Yeah, he told me to keep an eye on you, Cagalli. He's like a big brother to you, you know?" Axel chuckled.

I felt the wind knocked out of me… He only thinks of me as a little sister, nothing more… I couldn't help but feel really disappointed.

He would never have a crush on me… Our spark that we used to have was long gone… I know I have to move on from him, but it's just so hard. Every time I talk to other men, I always compare them to Vanitas and they are not even HALF as great as he is.

I always try to find someone better than him, but it never happens. I just don't feel butterflies with another man, like I do with him.

"Cagalli?" Axel called my name.

"Oh! Ugh, yeah sorry…" I stuttered around.

"Vanitas isn't here, so it's fine," Seifer said as he still had me really close to him.

"Suit yourself, but if he decides to come here and see you all over her then it's game over." Axel walked away from us to get more alcohol in the kitchen.

Seifer finally lets go of me and mumbled something then left me with Sora and Kairi.

I need to thank Axel later for scaring Seifer away from me. I hate when men wrap their arms around me when they are sloppy drunk. It makes things awkward and I always feel very uncomfortable.

"Cagalli, let's get a drink!" Kairi hiccupped.

"I think you had enough." Sora scowled at her.

"No!" Kairi pushed Sora away from her and grabbed my hand. She then pulled me into the kitchen with her.

"Kairi, you are going to get us too drunk!" I lectured as she poured each of us a glass full of vodka. She mixed it with orange juice and handed me a glass. I took a sip and gagged. She made it way too strong… Ugh, another Vanitas!

"It's not that bad!" She whined while she took a sip, but then she spits it back in her cup.

"Yeah, that's why you spit it out." I started to gulp my drink because I am beginning to feel like I am sobering up, and I did not want to be sober in this mad house!

"CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!" Kairi chanted making everyone in the kitchen chant with her.

I blushed, but I chugged my drink until there was not even a drop left in my red solo cup. Everyone began to cheer and I couldn't help but giggle. I love Kairi and her reckless behavior!

Kairi gave me a huge hug. "Hey, you should sleep over tonight! Sora is going over to Riku's, so it will just be me, you and my roommate!"

Kairi lives in an apartment with her best friend, Olette. Olette is very quiet, but I think she isn't too fond of me, which I don't understand why. I haven't done anything to offend her, but I try not to let it bother me for Kairi's sake.

"I guess… I know you will make me go to class even if I get really sick!" I poured myself another vodka drink; I tried to not make it as strong as Kairi did the first time!

"You know it!" Kairi winked. She takes schooling seriously even though she parties a lot. She gets good grades and never misses a class.

"Hey, guys." Riku approached us. He is childhood, friends with Kairi and Sora. He has long silver hair that comes past his neck and beautiful turquoise eyes.

Riku, Sora, and Kairi are inseparable! They seriously do everything together.

"Hey, Riku!" I gave him a friendly hug. "Why didn't you pregame with us?"

"I was napping and didn't hear Sora's and Kairi's text messages." Riku grinned sheepishly.

"RIKU! TAKE A SHOT WITH US!" Without agreeing, Kairi poured us vodka in tiny shot glasses.

"Kai, we are going to get sick! I swear if I throw up tonight or tomorrow morning, I am not going to class!" I took my shot and squirmed. I definitely am starting to feel tipsy!

"Oh, hush! I will drag you by the hair and make you go!" She took her shot and cheered.

Riku took his shot but didn't show a reaction. He is a heavy drinker just like Vanitas and his friends.

"LET US DO ANOTHER!" Kairi suggested.

"Kairi!" Riku and I shouted in unison. Riku and I both know for a fact that she and I will be deathly ill tomorrow.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is around midnight and even more people showed up to the house party! I am pretty drunk because I felt numb and I am being extra clumsy…

It's pretty bad when Kairi not only got ourselves drunk but Riku too. Riku and I decided to smoke a cigarette outside. I usually don't smoke, but when I am drinking I will smoke a couple here and there just to be social.

A lot of people are in the backyard smoking and drinking. I'm surprised there hasn't been a fight yet, but the night is still young…

"I thought Vanitas would be here since Axel and Seifer are here," Riku commented as he lit up his cigarette.

I just shrugged. I really didn't want to talk about Vanitas to anyone. I am trying to avoid the subject about him the whole time I am here…

"I don't know. He's with his girlfriend at the apartment… so."

"Ah, I see." Riku nodded and handed me a cigarette and his lighter.

I lit my cigarette and began to puff violently. Riku and I did a little small talk before I went back into the kitchen to make myself another drink.

I am still pretty drunk, but I wanted more… As I was pouring my vodka drink, someone covered my eyes from behind. I freaked and dropped the bottle on the ground, but lucky for me the bottle is plastic.

"I'm surprised you aren't in a corner making out with some guy." The guy whispered in my ear. His voice sounded so familiar, and his body is pressed against my back…

"Vanitas?" I hurried and turned around to see a smirking Vanitas.

"Hey," he said coolly.

I am so surprised he is here, but where's Eva? Wouldn't she be with him? I gave him a small hug, but he embraced me harder making me do the same.

I looked up at him and frowned. "Why did you say you are surprised I wasn't making out with someone? Are you calling me a whore?!"

"No, It's just we used to do that back in high school…"

"That was different!" I giggled.

"Because it was with me?" He asked.

I couldn't answer his question… I couldn't tell him the honest truth that it was because of him. I only wanted to make out with just him and no one else.

We locked eyes and we still had our arms wrapped around each other, but we both immediately let go when Axel ruined the mood…

"Hey, you made it!" Axel handed Vanitas a drink. "Where's Eva?"

"I told her I was going to bed and I wanted her to leave, so I came here." Vanitas grinned.

"So, you lied to her?" I scowled at him. I am glad he's here with us, but I hate it when he lies to people! It's so heartless.

"Don't be a buzz kill, Cagalli." Vanitas started to chug his drink.

"I am not a buzz kill! I am fun!" I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Yeah, yeah. Are you coming home with me tonight?" Vanitas finished his drink in less than a minute.

"No, I'm staying over Kairi's. Did you walk here?"

"No, I rode my street bike here," he answered.

I gasped. "Why the hell would you do that?! That's dangerous, Vanitas!"

"He does it all the time." Axel rolled his eyes. "He got to show off his big toy."

"That's stupid even for you!" I nudged Vanitas. I am not too pleased with him. I am not a big fan of people drinking and driving especially when someone is driving a STREET BIKE!

"Stop being a nag…" Vanitas put his arm around my waist. "Let's get another drink even though you can't handle much… You lightweight."

"I'm pretty decent at drinking and you know that!" I argued as I watched him pour my drink. I know he's going to make it strong!

"Sure." He smirked and handed me the drink.

I started to chug even though the vodka is burning my throat! I only could chug my drink halfway because I am gagging.

"Ha, I only put in a little vodka." He mocked.

"Shut up, Vanitas!"

He is making himself a drink, and, of course, he didn't use ANY mixers just straight vodka. It made me cringe just watching him drink it.

Vanitas smirked after he finished his drink and poured another glass full of vodka. He then grabbed me by the arm and dragged me into the living room to meet up with Seifer. I personally didn't want to see him, but Vanitas had a tight grip on me. I definitely couldn't leave his side even if I wanted to.

"Hey, you came!" Seifer stuttered his words. His eyes are bloodshot and I can tell he is blacking out.

"Yeah, this party is kind of lame," Vanitas muttered.

"You just got here." I glared at him.

"Whatever. Let's go outside. I need to smoke a cig." Without me protesting, he dragged me AGAIN to go outside. I swear he's like a little girl and I'm his little doll. He just drags me roughly without caring if he hurts me or not…

We went out in the back and people are more reckless than before, everyone is drunk and getting sloppy.

"Ha, Amateurs," Vanitas said as he lit up his cigarette.

"We have been drinking all night, what do you expect?" I raised a brow at him.

"I drink all day and I never get that sloppy." He inhaled and exhaled smoke from his cig.

"That's a lie! Remember that one time? You went to a couple bars and a casino then you came home and lied on top of me in my bed! I asked you why you were in my bed, and you weren't even making any sense! You couldn't even complete your sentences." I started to bust out laughing thinking about that night. It's strange how I didn't get annoyed with him.

I think it is because I never saw him that drunk in my life, but I secretly liked it. He is in distress and I had to help him. It was cute, to be honest.

"I never threw up, though." He blew smoke in my face making me cough up a lung!

"Hey!" I growled at him.

He smirked as he threw his cigarette on the ground and downed the rest of his drink. "Get me another one." He handed me his empty red solo cup.

"Can you say please?"

He blankly just stared at me. I knew I wasn't going to get a "please" so I just huffed and stormed off while he lit another cig. It took me forever to get into the kitchen because people wouldn't move out of the way, but I finally made it!

As I started to pour him a drink, Kairi hugged me from behind.

"Riku said Vanitas is here!" She whispered in my ear.

"Yeah," I answered.

"He must have come because of you!"

I turned around to face her and shook my head. "No, I think he came because of Axel and Seifer."

"If he wanted to hang with Seifer and Axel, he would just ask them to leave the house party to go to the bars. They are all twenty-one or twenty-two!" Kairi argued.

"Kai, you are too drunk." I dismissed her opinion, but it is strange he didn't ask his friends to go to the bars instead of this house party… I stayed with Kai for a little bit until Sora came rushing in the kitchen.

"Kairi! Don't wander off! I almost lost you." Sora grabbed her hand and took her back in the living room.

I sighed to myself and went to go back outside to give Vanitas his drink, but when I got there a girl is in deep conversation with him.

Her name is Alexia; she is one of the three girls Vanitas is talking to.

She has long brown hair and she is very tan. She is the same age as me, but we didn't have any classes together…

Alexia has her arms wrapped around him and he just stood there talking to her. He didn't have his arms around her, but he didn't push her away either.

I am definitely not going over there so I decided to go out front to avoid him and Alexia. I sat on the house's stoop and chugged Vanitas' drink. I made it very strong because he would've wanted it like that, but it's mine now. He can have _her_ make him a drink.

I chugged the whole drink and I felt my body light. I didn't care, though. I had a reason to drink. He is going to stay over her apartment tonight, and I felt like I need more and more alcohol in my body to forget that.

I don't want to think about him with another girl late at night like I always do. These drinks will make me forget about him and those three women he goes with!

I stood up from the stoop to get another drink in the kitchen, but someone forcefully pushed me down! I am lying on top of the stoop, and a college student who looked like a senior is hovering over me. He pinned my wrists, so I couldn't stand up.

"What a pretty lady," The boy said seductively. I can smell alcohol on his breath.

"Um, can you get off?!" I tried to struggle to break free, but it is no good. He's way too strong.

"Awe, come on! I want to have some fun!" He laughed as he leaned closer to my face. I think he is going to kiss me…

"EW, GET OFF!" I squealed. I didn't want him near me!

"GET AWAY FROM HER!" I heard a dark voice behind us.

The boy unpinned me and turned around to see… Vanitas.

"Vanitas?" I immediately stood up from the stoop and pulled my dress down, so I am not exposing my underwear for the world to see.

"Man, I'm just trying to get lucky!" The student slurred.

Vanitas' yellow eyes darken, which stunned me! I never saw him this angry before… He didn't say a word, but he punched the student right in the face causing the student to fall down on the porch. He is knocked out cold…

I slowly walked up to Vanitas and stared at his beautiful eyes. He saved me… "Thank you…" I whispered.

He just shrugged. "It's not a big deal." Vanitas is back to his old self…

"Hey, you! Are you causing problems?!" Another student pointed at Vanitas.

"So what if I am?" Vanitas asked in a low voice.

"I'll kill you!" Another student charged at Vanitas!

"Vanitas, no!" I started to freak out as Vanitas dodged the kid's punch. Vanitas then punched the kid in the gut causing him to grunt in pain.

Everyone around us stopped their conversations to watch Vanitas and the kid fighting, but then they all started to throw punches at each other!

It is a huge brawl that Vanitas started! I never understood why people always pick fights when they are drunk. I'm drunk right now, but I wouldn't dare to hurt another person! This is all Vanitas' fault! He always has to prove he's stronger than everyone…

"YES! A BIG BRAWL IS HAPPENING!" I heard Axel chant as he punched a random student in the face.

"I WANT IN ON THIS!" Seifer shouted while he started to attack students around him.

I watched everyone fighting on the front lawn, and I am confused on what to do.

I know the cops will show up soon. They are all causing too much commotion! This party turned into a mad house and it is all thanks to Vanitas!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Cagalli, wait up!" I heard Vanitas' voice from behind me, but I refuse to look back at him. I am annoyed with him because of the mess he made.

The party got busted and everyone ran away from the cops so they didn't get citations for underage drinking.

I am still pretty drunk as I walked a fast pace to try to get away from Vanitas.

"CAGALLI, COME ON! Let me at least take you home. You don't have to talk to me after we get back to our apartment!" Vanitas pleaded.

I turned around to face me. I felt like I had fire burning in my eyes. "You idiot!" I slapped him across the face! "What were you thinking?!"

"Geez, what a pain." Vanitas rubbed his cheek that I slapped.

"You started that big fight for no good reason!"

"No good reason, huh? If it wasn't for me, you would've got raped right on the front porch!" Vanitas grabbed my arm and pulled me close to him. "You never give me credit, Cagalli."

I felt tears well up in my eyes, he was right. If it weren't for him I would have gotten taken advantage of. Vanitas saved me, and I am being a drunken jerk to him.

Vanitas hugged me tightly and whispered in my hair. "It's okay, I will never let anyone do that to you."

I wished I could believe him, but I can't. Sometimes he will be there for me while other times he's nowhere to be found. Vanitas is a selfish person. He only cares for himself, even though he proved me wrong tonight, but when the sun comes up, he'll be back to his asshole self.

I couldn't help myself to be smitten by him. It was manly seeing him fight like that. He punched a guy for me! He turned the house party into a mad house, but he showed that he cared for me and me alone…

We broke our hug and I stared at him with widening eyes while he gave me a warming smile. I could give myself up to him, but I knew I would regret it in the morning.

"Are you going to ride with me?" He asked.

"No, I am walking home. You drank a lot and I don't want to die." I pouted. I wished he didn't do reckless stuff like that on a daily basis.

"How about this, I will buy you food then you can ride with me."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Vanitas, you need to stop bribing me with food, it's not going to work all the time, you know!"

Vanitas just smirked at me. "What are you talking about, it ALWAYS works."

"Well, not this time." I turned my back on him and began to walk away.

"We'll go to Co Go's to get fresh homemade pepperoni rolls!" He yelled from behind me.

I stopped in my tracks. That does sound good right now! I need something salty and greasy, and a pepperoni roll would be perfect!

"Well?" He came right behind me and whispered in my ear.

Without looking back at him, I sighed deeply. "Fine…"

"Ha, got you." He wrapped his arm around my waist as we started to walk side by side to go to Co Go's. Along the way, I cursed myself for being a sucker for food.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I are sitting on the curb in front of Co Go's, enjoying our homemade pepperoni rolls. They are so big and there are a lot of cheese and pepperoni in them! It melted in my mouth instantly!

"I don't get how you eat, so much but you are still so tiny," Vanitas commented as he chewed his food.

"I have curves!"

"You have an ass, but no tits…" He slowly grabbed my right breast.

"CUT IT OUT!" I slapped him on the head as hard as I could.

"I'm only kidding… Geez, you take things to heart."

"Do not!" I argued.

"Awe, look at them! Aren't they a cute couple?!" A woman loudly whispered to her boyfriend.

"I think they heard you," the boyfriend said in embarrassment.

I felt my cheeks flustered, but Vanitas showed no reaction. I scooted away from him, but he immediately wrapped his arm around my torso and pulled me close to him.

He continued to talk to me, acting as if nothing happened while I try to force myself to stop thinking thoughts of Vanitas and I being a couple.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Here, take this since you are afraid I am going to wreck." Vanitas handed me his black helmet. I put it on my head, but it felt uncomfortable because it is too big on my head.

"Why isn't their straps to adjust the sides?!"

"Just live with it, Cagalli." Vanitas rolled his eyes while he went on the front of his black street bike.

I stared blankly at him while he is getting comfortable. "Where's your helmet?" I asked.

"I don't need one, come on. I am tired."

I sighed and climbed on behind him. I wrapped my arms around his waist, praying we make it back home in one piece.

I am starting to feel sick, but I held it in because I would be embarrassed if I threw up in front of him.

Vanitas has seen me sick before, and he always makes fun of me for it, so I try my best not to get too sick anymore, but I fail miserably.

"Wrap your arms tighter around my waist, and scoot in closer," he ordered.

I did as he says and he started his engine. The muffler is roaring violently.

Without hesitation, he pressed down on the foot pegs and we are flying! He is going so fast, and the wind is hitting my face; it felt amazing.

Vanitas used to take me with him on his bike all the time, but ever since he and Eva started dating he stopped taking me. I missed this! I always felt so alive, so free when I am behind him on his bike…

He turned his head to make sure I am alright then he pressed down on the foot pegs to go even faster. I started to giggle; I am enjoying every moment with him.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

We are finally home, but I felt like I am going to throw up when I slowly got off of Vanitas' bike. I began to rock back and forth…

"Are you okay?" Vanitas asked.

I handed him his helmet, but I started to gag! I rushed over to the bushes next to our apartment and threw up!

I at least wanted to hold it in until I got into our bathroom!

As I kept throwing up, Vanitas pulled my long blonde hair back from behind, so I wouldn't puke on it.

"Let it all out." He rubbed my back with his free hand.

I did as he says and puked harder. Well, there goes my pepperoni roll, but at least I lost the calories for it…

After I was done puking, Vanitas picked me up in a cradle and took me to my room. He put my small trashcan next to my bed and tucked me in. I am still drunk even though I puked a lot… I couldn't fall asleep; my head is spinning! Vanitas went to leave me, but I grabbed his wrist.

"Do you need something? Water?" He asked.

"No, I just want your company!" I blurted out.

Vanitas chuckled. "Alright, move over…"

I did as he says and he lied on my bed. He is really close to my body and he is facing me. We stared at each other for a while until he started to mock me.

"Swear, you can't even drink a little without getting sloppy," he said.

"I drank a lot tonight… Sh!" I slurred.

"You are a pain in the ass, Cagalli," he whispered.

"Vanitas…"

"What?"

I looked deep in his eyes. "Can you come closer?"

His eyes widened at my request. "Why?"

"I have to tell you something..."

He did as I said. He slowly went close to my face.

"Closer."

He blinked, but he went a little closer until our foreheads are touching. "What do you have to tell me?"

I giggled then whispered, "You smell like cinnamon!"

I couldn't remember what he said back to me…

Everything after that was such a blur…


	3. Chapter 3 - You're The Lowest Type

**Author Note: I want to give a shout out to Blackpantherwolf for giving me advice on this story. If you haven't noticed I changed and cut some things out on the previous chapters to make it flow better, so again, thank you, Blackpantherwolf for telling me what I did wrong, I REALLY appreciate it. Also, there's a small bio about Cagalli on my main page if you want to read about her! I also have this story on wattpad and I am adding anyone who adds me, so if you need followers (like me) then add me! Username: Anya0901 One more thing, please review! I am trying to get better at my writing so don't hesitate to point good or bad things about this story… THANK YOU! Please enjoy!**

Chapter 3

You're The Lowest Type

 *** " I hope she takes your filthy heart and then she throws you away someday. " – Sleeping With Sirens –** ** _If You Can't Hang_**

 _"_ _Cagalli?" Vanitas called my name out softly as he touched my cheek with his fingertips._

 _"_ _Huh?" I am stunned by his gentle touch. He is not a gentle person, yet here he is, touching and speaking softly towards me._

 _"_ _You know I can never live without you. It's funny how much you mean to me." He paused and stared deep into my eyes. "I could never leave your side even if you try and push me out of your life. I will always come for you, Cagalli. You can't get rid of me, no matter what."_

 _"_ _Vanitas…" I felt my body growing light and hot from his kind words. He sounded so sincere… He has to mean what he says right? I hesitated as he leaned in to kiss me, but I finally puckered my lips, waiting patiently for him to claim me…_

 _I felt anxious and excited as he crashed his lips on my own. He then pulled back and started to lick my face! Why is he licking my face?! His tongue is wet and slobbery! Wait, now he is barking like a dog?! What the…_

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I opened my eyes and saw Killer standing there before me. He is so close that I felt his hot breath on my face.

I sat up on my bed and pet him smoothly. It was all just a dream… I should've known, Vanitas NEVER spoke softly towards me…

I turned my head to the side to see no one beside me. It would be nice to wake up and see his pretty face lying there next to me, but it was only wishful thinking.

"You know I can never live without you. It's funny how much you mean to me. I could never leave your side even if you try and push me out of your life. I will always come for you, Cagalli. You can't get rid of me, no matter what." I repeated what he said in my dream.

Killer stared at me, as I am lost in thought about Vanitas.

I almost forgot about my hangover until I started to gag! I immediately got out of bed and ran to the bathroom to throw up.

I made it to the toilet in time and I started to puke.

As I am throwing up, I thought to myself how I am never drinking again! I knew I was kidding myself, but throwing up this much was torture…

I felt Killer's paws from behind and he rested his head on the back of my neck. He always comforts me when I puke and for some odd reason, him being there really helps me get through this.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After I threw up as much as I could, I took a hot, steamy shower then I threw on leggings and a hoodie to go downstairs to see if Vanitas is still home.

Kairi is going to kill me, but I am skipping my classes today. My head is pounding and I am in no mood to see any of my classmates.

Killer followed behind me as I looked for Vanitas downstairs. I couldn't see him, but I heard his voice from outside. He is talking to someone, but whom? Curious, I snuck by the door that is leading to the backyard.

I crouched down by the glass door and looked to see Vanitas talking to Alexia. I felt my heart sinking as I am debating whether to listen to their conversation or not.

Killer is right beside me, watching my every move. I looked at him and took a deep breath. I then pressed my ear against the glass door. I know I am going to be very angry with Vanitas after I was done hearing their conversation…

"Vanitas, everyone at the party told me you were ALL over Cagalli! I thought she didn't mean anything to you? I thought she wasn't your type!" I heard Alexia loud and clear from the other side of the door.

"Baby, she doesn't mean anything to me. I was just looking out for her. She drank a lot last night, and she had no one to take care of her. I was only being a good roommate. You know if she were okay, I would've gone home with you last night… I love you, Alexia," Vanitas said gently.

My palms began to sweat and there is a huge lump in my throat. My heart… Is. Breaking. I went to leave to go in my room, but I heard Alexia answer him.

"If you love me so much then break up with Eva." She snorted.

"I will soon…" He answered.

"You have been saying this for months now."

"But, I mean it, I will."

"You tell her you love her too, huh?" Alexia asked.

"Yeah, but I don't mean it!"

"Whatever, Vanitas. I am not speaking to you until you dump Eva and prove to me you don't care for your roommate."

I refused to hear any more from my low life roommate and one of his side chicks! I rushed upstairs and slammed my bedroom door violently.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I forced myself not to cry as I am blowing my hair dry.

I wanted to get out of the house for a couple of days, so I didn't have to see Vanitas for a while. He knew I would've gone home with Kairi last night; he didn't have to stay by my side to take care of me!

It's not like I BEGGED him to stay with me! I felt my blood rushing through my veins. I am furious with him… How dare he! I should kick myself for falling in love with a jerk like him.

I don't know why I am surprised he said that to Alexia, but it still hurts me.

I hurried and packed clothes, my straightener, my makeup, jewelry, and some books so I can get started on some homework that is due early next week. I dialed Kairi's number, praying she is not in class right now.

I was lucky she picked up, "Hello?"

"Kairi!" I yelled out her name. My voice sounded shaky.

"What's wrong?" She asked in concern.

"I'll explain later. Can I stay with you for a couple of days?"

I heard her sigh. "What did Vanitas do _this_ time?"

"I'll explain later, please!"

"You know I never turn you down… Sure, I'll pick you up in ten minutes. I take it you skipped all your classes?!"

"Hush."

Kairi started to giggle. "What am I going to do with you? Alright, I'll see you soon."

"Bye!" I hung up my phone and went into the bathroom to get my necessities to throw in my duffle.

As I am searching for my hair products in the bathroom, I sensed _his_ presence behind me…

"What are you in a rush for?"

"I'm going to Kairi's," I bluntly answer him. I didn't even turn around to look at him.

"Geez, who pissed in your cereal?"

I didn't bother to answer him as I gathered all my necessities in my grasp. I then walked past him without making eye contact.

The low life had the nerve to follow me in my room.

"Do you mind? I kind of want to gather my things without you here!" I snapped at him

"Cagalli, are you mad at me or something?"

"No," I lied.

"Don't lie. You always run to Kairi's for a couple of days when you are mad at me."

"I'm not mad! Just go away!" I shouted. Him being in my room is not helping the situation. If he stays here any longer I might punch him.

"Fine," he mumbled as he left my room.

I felt tears well up as I zipped my duffle bag shut. I thought he cared about me, but it was all just a lie…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I hurried downstairs when I heard Kairi beep her car horn. Vanitas muttered something when I ran passed him, but I ignored him. I am just happy to get away for a couple of days.

I opened Kairi's car door and immediately sat down. Kairi, without hesitation, drove away from my depressing apartment with my nightmare inside.

"So what happened?" She asked as she turned the volume of the radio down.

"I'll tell you later. If I tell you now, I will start to cry and I'm not ready to cry yet…"

"Cagalli…"

"I just can't believe him! I thought he cared about me."

"You say that almost every week..."

"You're right…" I always expect so much of Vanitas, but I always end up disappointed.

"Don't worry, I will get your mind off of him! I always do!"

"That's why I always run to you, Kai." I gave her a small smile.

She just giggled and we changed the subject to try and get my mind off of Vanitas, but I still pictured his face in the back of my mind.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Are you kidding me?!" Sora whined. I told him and Kairi the whole story about Vanitas' and Alexia's conversation this morning.

I lied back on Kairi's bed and let out a deep sigh. "I just can't believe it…"

"I think he's lying, though. He was glued to you ALL night last night! Axel, Seifer, and Riku even said something to Sora and me," Kairi said.

"Kai, you always stick up for him!" Sora scowled at her.

"I just have this feeling he really likes her, Sora." She scowled back at her high school sweetheart.

"Even if he did lie to Alexia, that is still wrong of him, and he told her that he _loves_ her." I tried my best not to tear up in front of my friends.

"He uses the word "love" so loosely, though," Sora muttered.

"He really does!" Kairi agreed.

"I just don't know how much more I can take. I just can't hang out with him anymore, or I'm going to get more attached," I said as I am staring at the ceiling.

"I don't know how you are going to stay away from him… You live with him!" Sora stated.

"I know, it's so hard to live with him because when he leaves me at night; I know he's with one of those girls and it kills me inside," I whispered.

"Well, you can always stay at my place!" Kairi cheered.

"Thanks, Kai." I sat up on the bed and grinned.

"Oh, great!" Sora shouted in annoyance as he stared at his phone.

"What is it?" Kairi asked.

"Vanitas is calling me… Hold on." Sora answered the phone and left Kairi's room to talk to Vanitas privately.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Kairi and I are in deep conversation about the party last night until Sora came back in the room.

"So annoying." Sora rolled his eyes.

"What did he say?!" Kairi asked curiously.

"He asked if Cagalli is mad at him and I told him she is," Sora explained.

"WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!? Now he's going to know I eavesdropped on his conversation!" I moaned in frustration.

"I don't know why you are feeling embarrassed; he's the one who should feel like shit for the way he talked down on you like that!" Sora argued.

"So, what did he say when you said that Cagalli was mad at him?" Kairi raised a brow.

"Nothing… really. All he said was, "shit" and mumbled how he didn't mean it like that," Sora answered.

"He did mean it… He's just saying that because I caught him," I sighed.

"Exactly," Sora agreed.

"Maybe you should talk to him," Kairi suggested.

"NO!" Sora and I both yelled in unison.

"Look, let's just forget about him right now. Let's do something fun!" I am sick of worrying if Vanitas meant what he said to Alexia or not. I just want to hang out with my friends and forget about him for at least the rest of the day.

"Let's play a board game!" Sora grinned from ear to ear.

"Of course you want to play board games because you always win!" Kai whined.

"What game do you want to play?" I asked.

Sora went under Kairi's bed to grab the game, "Sorry".

"Knew it!" I giggled. Sora always wins in "Sorry".

"Let's play! You both are no match for me!" Sora started to set up the game on the floor.

If a board game helps me get over Vanitas, then so be it.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"SORRY!" Sora yelled as he knocked one of my game pieces off the board.

"Damn," I mumbled while I put my piece back to the starting point.

"Wow, you are really good!" Hayner commented.

The game started with just Kai, Sora, and I, but Olette's boyfriend, Hayner came in and demanded to play with us. It is only a four, person game, so Olette just sat next to her boyfriend and observed us.

"Told you!" Sora bragged.

"This is why I hate playing board games with you," Kai said as she rolled the dice.

I looked at my phone and was surprised it is already twelve at night. We seriously played this game all day and all night! Of course, Sora won every time.

"Hayner, how much longer are you going to play? We still have to study for that history test that is tomorrow!" Olette huffed at her boyfriend.

"After this game, we will study, geez!" Hayner snapped.

I felt my phone vibrate and it was Vanitas calling me! "Oh, no!"

"What?" The four of them asked in unison.

"Vanitas is calling me," I whispered.

"ANSWER IT!" Kai cheered.

"NO!" Sora shook his head.

"I'm going to ignore it." I stared at my phone until it stopped ringing.

"Good girl!" Sora praised.

"I would've answered it." Kai hummed.

"No, Sora is right-" I am interrupted by my phone, and it is Vanitas, AGAIN.

"ANSWER IT!" Kairi begged.

I sighed and finally answered it. I am in no mood to play into Vanitas' game. "Hello?"

"Cagalli!" I heard his voice. He sounded drunk and there are a lot of people talking in the background.

"What do you want, Vanitas?" I asked annoyingly.

"Can you pick me up?" He slurred.

I felt anger building up inside me. "WHY DON'T YOU GET ALEXIA TO PICK YOU UP!?"

"I don't want Alexia, I want you," he said coolly.

"Well, I can't!" Before he said anything else, I hung up the phone.

"Why did you hang up!?" Kairi pouted.

"Because he wants me to pick him up at a bar. Like, why don't you get your girlfriend or Alexia to do it since he loves them SO much!" I freaked, making everyone in the room jump.

"Yeah, you did the right thing," Sora said.

"What if he gets hurt? You should pick him up!" Kairi looked at me with pleading eyes.

"With what car? I don't have one, remember?" I sighed deeply. "He'll be fine…"

Before we said anymore, my phone rings again and, of course, it is Vanitas.

I picked up the phone. "What?!"

"Please, Cagalli?! You can drive my car. The keys are on the kitchen counter," Vanitas said.

"I'm at Kai's and I won't be back home for a couple of days." I tried my best not to yell at him.

"Get her to drop you off and then pick me up-"

I interrupted him. "No, either get Eva or Alexia to do it, I'm not leaving Kai's!"

"Fine, I'll just walk home in the rain!" He snapped.

"It's raining?" I looked out the window and it is pouring! I couldn't believe I didn't realize it is raining until he mentioned it. "Van, just call someone else… I just… Can't see you right now."

"I want to explain myself," he whispered.

"What is there to explain? That you play everyone with your sick and twisted games?" I asked sarcastically.

There is silence then I heard him let out a deep sigh. "I feel really bad, Cagalli… I really do."

"Listen, I'll pick you up, but don't talk to me at all the ride back. I want NOTHING to do with you right now! Stay inside the bar until I get there… What bar are you even at?" I felt stupid giving into him.

"I'm at Luigi's," he answered.

"Kay, be there in fifteen!" I hung up the phone and sighed. "Kai?"

She just grinned at me. "Are you going to pick him up?"

"Yeah, but can you drop me off at my apartment? I'm going to drive his car." I explained.

"Yeah, let's go now! He's waiting for you!" I can tell Kairi is happy I am giving into him, but I felt a huge knot in my stomach.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I practically jumped out of Kai's car to run into my apartment. I did not want to get soaked! I had my duffle bag with me because I knew I would be staying at the apartment with _him_ tonight _._

I hurried and grabbed his keys then I put my hood up to rush back outside to go into Vanitas' red sports car.

His car is very well kept; my only complaint is that it reeked of cigarettes. I tried my best to ignore the smell as I turned the key in the ignition and floored it…

According to Vanitas and my friends, I am considered a "bad driver", but I don't think I am… That… Bad.

Anyways, I drove real fast to get my idiot roommate. The drive only took ten minutes, and I texted him twice to hurry and come in the car. I looked out my window and I saw him. He put his hood up as he approached the car. I unlocked it and he came right in.

"Hey, shorty," he greeted. I could smell whiskey off of him.

I didn't answer as I started to drive back to our apartment.

"Don't tell me you are still pissed at me?" He asked.

"Vanitas, I told you I don't want to speak to you right now." I clenched my teeth as I kept my eyes on the road.

Vanitas suddenly put his hand on my upper thigh.

"Get… YOUR HAND OFF MY THIGH!" I yelled.

"Calm down. I'm just resting my hand there. I am not going to do anything to you."

"NOW!" I growled.

He did as I said and removed his hand off of me. "You are so lame…"

"I don't care what you think about me, Van."

"I know that…" He mumbled to himself.

"I'm surprised you didn't stay at the bars until two."

"I was drinking since three in the afternoon, so it got old."

I turned my head to study him. "Why did you drink so early?"

"I felt bad when I found out from Sora that you heard **everything**."

"It just hurts, Vanitas. You didn't have to help me at all last night. Kairi was there for me."

"I didn't hang around you because I thought you needed help," he whispered.

"That's not what you told Alexia."

"I lied…"

"What else is new?" I snorted.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"You lie to everyone…"

"I don't lie to you."

I rolled my eyes at his comment. "See, you are lying now."

"Geez, Cagalli."

"You'll never change," I whispered to myself.

"One day I will."

"Yeah, when pigs fly," I said sarcastically.

There is finally silence for a little while until I almost hit a car in front of me because I am NOT paying attention… I need to focus more when I am driving…

"Swear, you can't drive to save your own life," Vanitas chuckled.

"Then why did you call me to pick you up?" I glared at him.

"Because I wanted to see you."

"Whatever,"

He said one day he would change. I wish I could believe him, I really do.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

We are finally home, and without waiting up for Vanitas, I went into the house to go to my room. I am done talking to him for tonight, well, so I thought…

"Hey!" He entered my room and gave me a cold glare.

"I'm going to bed, goodbye."

"No, you are not… I want you to stay up with me."

"I'll pass."

He lied on my bed and stared at the ceiling. "Fine, I guess I will go to sleep too."

"Not in my room, you are not!" I can't believe he is teasing me right now. Hasn't he pissed me off enough?

"Cagalli, lay with me…" He hummed.

"Please just go in your own room."

He sat up on my bed and gave me a seductive look. "If you don't come in bed with me then I will make you lay with me."

"I'm not playing your games tonight." I turned my back on him to leave the room to go downstairs and sleep on the couch.

As I am leaving, I felt strong arms wrapped around me from behind.

"Stop, Van!" I screeched as he picked me up, effortlessly and threw me on my bed.

"I told you I would make you lay with me." He lied on top of me and pinned my wrists down so I couldn't move.

"I can't believe this…" I mumbled.

"You are staying up with me too."

"What are we going to do then?" I asked. I knew I couldn't keep arguing with him; he ALWAYS gets his way…

"Let's watch a scary movie," he said.

"I'm really not in the mood." I shivered. Vanitas always picks a scary movie with a lot of gore in it, and I naturally have nightmares after I watch them with him.

"You afraid?" He stared deep into my eyes, smirking.

"Not at all," I lied.

"Now who's the one lying?"

"Okay, whatever. Let's watch just one…"

Without a word, Vanitas unpinned me and rushed into his room to get a scary movie. I stayed lying on the bed; I had my hand over my heart because it is beating so fast. I wished he didn't have this much effect on me…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Oh my god!" I freaked, as my eyes widened at the serial killer chopping a young woman in little tiny pieces. I covered my eyes as the victim kept screaming and crying.

"Ha, it's not even that bad." Vanitas mocked as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. We are sitting side by side on my bed watching this awful scary movie.

I usually would have pushed him away, but having his arm wrapped around me made me relax a little.

"You like it when I cuddle with you, huh?" He asked seductively.

I ignored his question as my eyes are glued to the TV screen. I yelped while I watched the serial killer rip the woman's eyes out of her eye sockets.

Vanitas used this opportunity to pull me on his lap, without thinking, I buried my head in his chest and wrapped my arms around his waist.

I can hear Vanitas chuckling in my hair. "You are such a little baby…"

I felt my body tremble as I pictured the young woman getting brutally murdered over and over again.

"Cagalli?"

I looked up at him with widening eyes. "What?"

"You know this is fake right?"

"Well, yeah, but it's so hard to watch stuff like this. People are crazy in this world, it could happen, you know?"

Vanitas just smirked. "I wouldn't let a serial killer go near you…"

"You say that, but I bet if he really came to kill me then you would run away…"

"Maybe with someone else, but with you, I would risk my life for you," he said sincerely.

I felt my face turning red. "You are just saying that because you are drunk…"

"I'm starting to sober up… A little bit," he whispered.

I looked deep into his yellow pupils and they soothed me from being frightened of this movie…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The movie is finally over and I couldn't help but feel relieved. I laid back in my bed and Vanitas laid right next to me.

"Do you want me to be by your side tonight?" He turned his head to study me.

I thought about the scary movie we just watched and sighed deeply. "Yeah…"

"That scary movie got to you, huh? You couldn't keep your hands off me." He chuckled.

"Shut up, Van." I turned to my side away from him, but he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his embrace. He is the big spoon while I am the little spoon.

"Cagalli?" He whispered in my ear.

"Hm?"

"You know I can never live without you. It's funny how much you mean to me. I could never leave your side even if you try and push me out of your life. I will always come for you, Cagalli. You can't get rid of me, no matter what."

Wait, am I dreaming? Did I fall asleep during the movie? Is this déjà vu? I couldn't believe my ears right now. I don't even know what to answer to that. I am too stunned.

"Van?" I finally spoke up as I turned my head, but his eyes are closed and he is breathing slowly… He fell asleep on me while I am wide-awake from his unexpected words.


	4. Chapter 4 - You Feel Like Paradise

**Author Note: If you LOVE song covers please check out Sam Tsui's Youtube videos! They are really, REALLY good! He has a voice of an angel's. Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoy writing it** **J**

Chapter 4

You Feel Like Paradise & I Need A Vacation Tonight

 *** "Hey, you might think that I'm crazy. But you know I'm just your type." - Cover: Sam Tsui (Originally by Britney Spears) –** ** _Hold It Against Me_**

As I am in the shower lavishing my body with soap, the shower curtain is pulled violently opened and there is Vanitas staring at my soaped-up body.

"WHAT THE HELL!" I screeched, trying to cover my body with my hands.

"What time are you leaving to go to your class?" He asked, ignoring my reaction to his sudden outburst.

"Couldn't you wait until after I was done with my shower to ask me that?!" I clenched my teeth.

He just smirked at me, "Nope."

I let out a deep sigh. "I'm walking to go to campus in an hour and a half."

"Alright, I might go to my classes today, but only if you get coffee with me, my treat."

"Wow, I'm surprised you aren't skipping. What's with the sudden change?"

Vanitas just shrugged. "I don't know, I guess I just feel like going, that's all."

"Well, okay…"

"I'll drive so you don't have to walk."

"Are we riding on your street bike?"

"Yep."

"Cool, now get out!" I felt my face burning. He saw me naked plenty of times, but that was a long time ago…

Vanitas started to laugh. "I forgot your boobs aren't as small when you are naked. Hmm, looks can be deceiving."

"OUT!" I pointed at the door.

"Fine, fine," he said before he left me.

I felt my heart was going to explode right then and there.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I threw on a pink casual mini skirt with a black tank top, and black sandals. I then curled my hair and did my makeup. I'm still stunned that Vanitas is going to go to his classes, but I'm very impressed. Maybe, he is somewhat wising up, or MAYBE he is up to something… I better find out what he's up to when we get our coffees!

"Cagalli?" Vanitas came barging in my room.

"Yeah?"

"Ready?" He asked as he is staring at me.

"What?!" I began to freak. I hate it when people stare at me! It makes me feel self-conscious. "Is there something on my face?!"

"No…" He scratched the back of his jet, black hair. "You look… Nice." He blushed a little.

"Why are you blushing?"

"I'm not," he said coldly.

"Okay… So are we leaving now?"

"Yeah, let's go."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"So, what are you doing after your class?" Vanitas asked as he took a big sip of his black coffee; we went to the Starbucks that is close to our campus.

"Ew, how can you just drink your coffee black?" I gagged before I answered his question. "Um, I don't know yet… Kai and I want to go bar hopping, but our fakes didn't come in her mail yet."

"You guys bought fakes?" He raised a brow at me.

"Um, yeah. It was her idea of course! Riku talked her into it," I said while I took a small swig of my caramel latte.

"Didn't Riku have a fake since freshman year?"

"That's what Kairi said… He's VERY mature looking so the bouncers never question him."

"I doubt the bouncers would believe you… You look like you're twelve." Vanitas snorted at me.

"Only without makeup!" I pouted.

"Right…" Vanitas smirked.

"VANITAS!" Eva shouted from across the coffee shop.

 _Oh great._ I thought to myself as she approached our table.

"What's up?" Vanitas asked her casually.

Eva immediately sat on Vanitas' lap, making him grunt. "Nothing, BABY!"

I felt so awkward being here now… She is staring me down like I should leave or something… Well, she won. I slowly got up and gave them a fake smile even though them cuddling is killing me inside.

"I'm going to go to my class. I'll see you two lovebirds later!" I waved and started to walk away.

"It's only twelve, doesn't it start at twelve-fifty?" Vanitas asked.

"Um, yeah, but I got to meet with my professor about something," I lied as I kept walking.

"Well, okay. See you later then," Vanitas muttered.

"Bye!" Eva shouted; her tone of voice sounded very phony.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"CAGALLI, CAGALLI!" I heard Kai's voice from behind me.

"Kai?"

She is holding a vanilla folder. "LOOK WHAT CAME IN THE MAIL!"

I gasped out loud. "NO WAY! THEY CAME?!"

She took out my fake ids and handed them to me. "We each get two!"

I stared at my fakes and gave her a huge grin. "We can go to the bars tonight then!"

"Yes! I already gave Sora and Tidus theirs!"

"Oh, I forgot they were in on this too!"

"Well, it's been so long since we ordered them so I don't blame you for forgetting."

"That's true," I answered.

"SO!"

"SO?"

"How was last night?!" Kairi asked cheerfully.

"Um."

"DON'T TELL ME YOU GUYS SLEPT TOGETHER!" Kairi screamed, causing classmates around us to stop and stare.

"No way!"

"Oh… Well, tell me what all happened then!" Kai linked arms with me and we started to walk to find a more private place to talk about last night.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Awe, he's adorable!" Kai praised as I finished telling her about last night.

"Not really…" I rolled my eyes. "He took me to get coffee today and we had a good conversation until Eva came out of nowhere…"

"Oh." Kai frowned. "I take it you left because of her."

"Yeah…"

"Cagalli, if he really liked her then he would've asked her yesterday to drive him home and not ask you."

"Honestly, Kai, I can't get my hopes up on him. He'll do something sweet one day then be a total jerk the next. I can't figure him out and it's stressing me out. I want to not worry about him right now. I just want to be excited about the bars tonight, okay?"

Kairi nodded. "Yeah, the bars are going to be a new experience! I can't wait…"

"Who's all coming?" I asked curiously.

"Sora told me Riku, Tidus, Wakka, Yuffie, and Zack."

"Who's Zack?"

"Oh, that's right… You never met him. He's a senior here."

"I see."

"He's really cute! Sora has been wanting you to meet him." Kairi sighed.

"Don't tell me your boyfriend asked him to come because of me?!"

"Kind of…"

I just shook my head in disbelieve. "Oh, Sora…"

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am done with my one and only class for today, and I waited for Vanitas under a willow tree.

As I am sitting, I watched all the students going in and out of their classes, trying to figure out who this "Zack" kid was.

Kairi described to me what he looks like. He supposedly has black spiky hair, (sort of like Vanitas') and he has dark blue eyes… Kairi also told me that he is very tall and thin but has arm muscles.

I kept my focus on the students until I sensed someone behind me.

I turned my head to see a student standing there before me.

"Hey," he said kindly.

He looked exactly like the kid Kairi described… Is this truly Zack?

"Um, hi." I greeted back. I'm not going to lie, but he is cute…

"Can I… sit by you?" He asked.

"Sure…"

He sat REALLY close to me on the ground. "So, is your name Cagalli?"

I blinked. "Yeah."

"I heard so much about you." He grinned.

"I take it your Zack then?"

"Yeah!"

"Kairi told me about you. You are hanging out with us tonight, right?"

"Of course. Sora was the one who invited me."

 _Not surprised there._ I thought to myself…

"And you are very beautiful!"

I blushed at his comment. "Not really…"

"Don't deny it, it's true."

Wow, Zack is very open and kind. (Not to mention forward too). He's a lot different from Vanitas, but Zack seems to have a good heart and he is good looking…

Zack looked at his phone and gasped. "Oh, geez! Sorry, I have to go to my class, but I'll see you tonight!" He immediately stood up and gave me a warming smile.

"Okay, it was nice meeting you, Zack."

"Nice meeting you too! Bye!" He waved and rushed to go to his class.

Well, I finally got to meet this Zack kid Kairi was talking about.

I checked my phone and huffed. Where is Vanitas? He was supposed to meet me ten minutes ago! I went to text him, but I heard someone call out his name…

I then saw Vanitas slowly approaching a man with long blue hair with an X-shaped scar between his yellow eyes. Strange…

I watched them carefully and saw Vanitas pull out a brown bag and handed it to the man. The man looked inside and handed Vanitas cash. I wonder what is in the brown bag? This whole situation looks shady…

Vanitas then walked away from the man and came walking towards me.

"Who was that?" I asked in concern.

"A friend," He answered as he leaned his back against the tree.

"I never saw him before…"

"He's a senior just like me."

"What's his name?"

"Not important."

I glared at him. "What was in the bag?"

"Why do you care?!"

"Whatever, Vanitas. Can we go home now?!" I stood up from sitting on the ground.

"Yeah…"

As we are walking, I looked back at the man with the X-shaped scar on his face and he watched us carefully. I felt chills running down my spine… The man kind of freaked me out with his stares, but I really want to know what was in the bag… What is Vanitas up to?

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is quiet between Vanitas and me for the rest of the day until he came in my room while I am getting ready for the bars.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"Well, Kai and I finally got our fakes so we are heading to the bars tonight…" I answered as I am fixing my hair.

"Oh, sounds fun. What bars?"

"We don't know yet…"

"Are you pre-gaming here?" Vanitas asked while he sat on my bed.

"Yeah, it's just going to be Kairi, Sora, and some of their friends. They should be here shortly."

"I see…"

I wanted to keep pestering Vanitas about what happened on campus, but I didn't want him mad at me, and I know he wouldn't tell me anyway…

"I might be going to the bars tonight too…" Vanitas muttered.

"Whom are you going with?"

"Just Axel and Seifer."

"Are you guys going to pregame with us?"

"I don't see why not," he said smoothly.

I stood up from my seat and turned to look at him. "Well, I'm changing, so get."

Without another word, Vanitas slowly stood up and walked out of my room.

 _Vanitas, why are you being shady?_

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I changed into a gray mini skirt, high pink flip-flops, and a white crop top that has holes above my chest to show a little cleavage. I checked myself in the mirror for the last time before I headed downstairs. As I walked down the stairs I heard people talking and I realized that my friends are here.

"CAGALLI!" Kairi cheered. "You look beautiful!"

"Why didn't you guys tell me you were here?" I asked as I hugged Kai.

"We just got here and I knew you would want your privacy while you were getting ready," Kai answered.

"Hey, Cagalli!" Zack greeted me. He looks really good! He has jeans on with a black tee.

"Hey, Zack." I blushed a little while I am checking him out.

"So, are we taking shots or what?" Yuffie asked.

"Of course!" Kairi smiled.

"Yeah, man! Can't wait!" Wakka chuckled.

I led them into the kitchen and we all started to pour shots, and we all chanted before we gulped them down. We then hurried and poured more alcohol in our tiny shot glasses.

"Starting already?" Vanitas entered the kitchen and leaned back against the fridge.

"Yeah, want to join?" I asked.

"Nah, I'm waiting for Axel and Seifer…"

"Suit yourself." I shrugged while I downed my shot.

Zack is standing next to me, and I felt his eyes are glued to me.

"Um?" I turned to look at him and he just blushed.

"I'm sorry… It's just you look really beautiful." He grinned at me.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"Yeah, my roommate always looks good," Vanitas said to Zack coldly.

"Oh, someone's jealous," I heard Kairi say under her breath.

"I didn't know you lived with a boy." Zack gave Sora a dirty look. He's probably mad at Sora for not mentioning that I live with Vanitas…

"They're just friends." Sora countered.

"We are actually really close," Vanitas smirked.

"Oh." Zack frowned.

Why would Vanitas say that?! I mean, we are really close, but he's making out like we are more than friends!

I stared at Zack, but he wouldn't look at me back. Great, he probably thinks Vanitas and I are hooking up or something…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

My friends and I each drank seven shots and decided to head out to the bars. As we are leaving, Vanitas' friends came over and of course, Eva is with them.

Vanitas didn't mention to me that she is going to be with them, but why am I surprised? She IS his girlfriend after all.

I am happy we left before they all started to drink together…

"We should go to a bar with a dance floor!" Kairi shouted as we are all walking on the sidewalk.

"Sora would like that! He can grind on her, huh?" Wakka nudged Sora as Sora's face turned bright red.

"You should let Tidus and Riku know where we are going then!" Yuffie commented.

"I'll text them now." Kairi started to violently text on her phone.

Zack is walking in silence behind us, and I couldn't help but feel bad. I don't want him mad at me; we just met! I turned around and cleared my throat.

"Zack?"

"Yeah?" He looked at me with sadden eyes.

"Can I talk to you in private?" I asked pleadingly.

"Um, sure," he muttered.

I turned my attention to everyone else. "Hey, guys. I want to talk to Zack alone, so can we just meet you there?"

"YEAH, GOOD IDEA!" Sora grinned at the two of us. He REALLY wants Zack and me to get along…

"Um, you sure, Cagalli?" Kairi asked.

"Yeah, we won't be too far behind." I smiled at her.

"Alright, see you!" Kairi waved.

Zack and I waited until we couldn't see them in our sights; I then took a deep breath.

"Hey, about my roommate…"

"It's not a problem. I understand." Zack interrupted me.

"No, you don't," I said sternly. "I'm not going to lie, but I do have a crush on him, it's just he's no good for me. He has a girlfriend and he hooks up with two other girls. We USED to hook up back in high school, but we don't anymore. We are just friends."

Zack rubbed the back of his head. "Is that why Sora is trying to hook us up?"

"Yeah, he thinks his cousin is bad for me, and he is right, you know."

Zack took both of my hands in his. "Listen, you are very gorgeous and you don't need a man like that. You need someone to treat you right and I know we just met, but I want to be the one who takes care of you. When I saw you sitting there by yourself under that tree today; I couldn't help but be smitten by you," he chuckled softly. "You're adorable."

I looked deep into his blue eyes. "Zack…"

"Let's see how this night turns out and we'll take it from there." He grinned.

"Okay, deal." I nodded and we started to walk hand in hand to catch up with our friends.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Wow, this place is nice," I said in amazement.

"Yeah, it's beautiful!" Kairi agreed.

Inside this club are all white walls with beautiful blue, fluorescent lights all around us. It looks like something in a fairytale book!

The club is very majestic looking.

Sora immediately took Kairi's hand to guide her on the dance floor, while Yuffie and Wakka went to talk to Tidus and Riku. Zack and I are the only ones left in the group to figure out what to do.

"Do you dance?" He asked.

"Ugh, not really." I hung my head. I'm not good at dancing at all! I always embarrass myself.

"Okay," he whispered in disappointment. "Well, do you want to get a drink at the bar?"

"Yes, I would like that."

Without hesitation, he took my hand in his and we went to the bar.

"What do you want?" He asked.

"Pineapple vodka."

"Okay, A rum and coke and a pineapple vodka, please," he said to the bartender.

I went to get money out of my clutch, but Zack immediately stopped me.

"My treat." He winked.

"No, I can't…"

"No, I want to," he insisted.

"Okay…"

He handed me my drink and we went to sit in the lounge area. I loved how comfy the white leather couches are. I felt my butt sinking in them.

Zack sat really close to me and he put his arm around my shoulders; I couldn't help but rest my head on his nearest shoulder.

"You're perfect…" He took a sip of his rum and coke.

"Are you drunk already?" I teased.

"Not at all. Just stating a fact." He laughed.

"I'm surprised you don't have a girlfriend…"

"Why's that?"

"I don't know." I sipped my drink. I didn't want to admit to him because he is very good looking; that would be too bold of me.

"I've been single for six months now…" He sighed.

"Would I know her?" I curiously asked.

"Maybe, her name is Aeris."

"No, I don't know her… Is she a student that goes to our school?"

"Yeah, she's a senior," he answered.

"How long have you guys dated?"

"Three years."

I gasped and lifted my head off his shoulder. I then chugged my drink.

Zack looked at me with widened eyes. "It's fine… Trust me, no big deal!"

"Okay…"

Zack finished his drink and grabbed mine out of my hands. "I'll get us another drink."

I watched him walk away and sighed deeply. Great, he's dated a girl for three years and it's only been sixth months since they broke up. I wonder if he still has feelings for her? Oh, come on, Cagalli, of course, he does! Three years is a LONG time!

"Hey,"

I looked up and saw Vanitas staring at me.

"Hi." Why is Vanitas at the same bar as us?

"Where's your boyfriend?" He smirked.

"Getting me a drink," I answered him bluntly. If he wants to be a smartass, then I'll be a smartass back.

Vanitas rolled his eyes. "He's nothing special."

"I don't know… I kind of like him and I just met him." I pondered.

Vanitas eyes widened. "What's so great about him?" He asked harshly.

"He's very kind and gentle…"

Vanitas snorted. "Sounds lame."

"Whatever, Vanitas. Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend instead of pestering me?"

"I rather pester you…"

"I'm back!" Zack approached us and handed me my drink. "Oh, hey." He greeted Vanitas.

Vanitas smirked at him. "See you two later, I guess." He then left us alone.

"Did I interrupt something?" Zack asked while he sat down next to me.

"Not at all." I started to chug my drink because I didn't want to see Vanitas and Eva dancing together on the dance floor.

"Hey, ugh… Maybe you should slow down?" Zack suggested.

"I'm good!" I finished my drink and went to stand up to get another, but Zack pushed me to sit back down.

"I got it… Here hold mine." He sighed as he went back to the bar.

I started to feel embarrassed because Zack just came back and now he's getting me another. Maybe I should pace myself, but I REALLY don't want to see my roommate and his girlfriend together. I want to forget about him and alcohol is the only way…

"Here." Vanitas came out of nowhere and handed me a shot.

"Why are you giving this to me?" I sniffed it then gagged. "It smells like toothpaste!"

"Just take it…"

I did as he says and started to shiver. "Ew, what did you make me take?"

"Rumple Minze."

"It's gross…"

Vanitas smirked. "It'll make you feel good, trust me…"

I rolled my eyes and leaned back on the couch. I am starting to feel a little tipsy.

"You feel good? We should leave and go somewhere else, just the two of us," he leaned in and whispered in my ear.

"No, I'm staying here." I scowled.

"With him?" Vanitas hissed, referring to Zack.

"Yeah."

Vanitas didn't say another word, but he turned and walked away. He is finally going to leave me alone for tonight…

"Cagalli." Zack is finally back, with my drink.

"YAY!" I said cheerfully! My head is starting to pound. I wonder how many proofs that shot Vanitas' gave me was? I handed Zack his drink back while he gave me my new one.

"You sure like to drink huh?" Zack asked.

"Mhm…" I took a big gulp of my drink. "May I sit on your lap?"

"Um, sure…"

I got up from my seat and sat on his lap. Zack then wrapped his arms around my waist, and I crossed my legs so my underwear wasn't exposing.

"Much better!" I turned my head so I am looking at him.

"Are you drunk now?"

"A little bit," I said innocently as I took a sip of my drink. "Are you?"

"Not really…"

"Have you heard of Rumple Minze?"

"Yeah, they're like one hundred proof."

"WHAT!" I freaked. "I… Didn't know that."

"Yeah, I had ten of them one time and I couldn't remember a thing after that night."

"Well, we should do a shot!"

"How about after our drinks?" He suggested.

"Okay!" I said as I started to chug my drink.

"Wow, Cagalli. You are something else." Zack began to bust out laughing.

"Don't make fun of me." I pouted.

"I'm not… It's cute, really."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Zack and I are at the bar taking shots after shots of Rumple Minze. I lost count how many we took together, but I know I am starting to feel really, really drunk. I couldn't stand straight, and I kept leaning into Zack.

"You okay there?" He asked.

"Yeah…"

Zack snickered while he put his hand around my waist so I would stay leaning into him.

"Hey, Cagalli!" Riku approached us and smirked. "Someone's drunk."

"Shut up, Riku!" I slurred.

"Sorry… Hey, Vanitas wants to talk to you."

"I can talk to him later," I answered.

"He says it's important," Riku muttered.

"Um…" I looked at Zack for approval and he just nodded.

"Yeah, go ahead. I'll be waiting for you here, I guess." He gave me a weak smile.

"Okay, I'll be back!"

I started to walk, but I almost fell over! Zack immediately grabbed me, so I wouldn't be on the ground.

"Sorry!" I apologized.

"I got her!" A dark voice said from behind and it was… Vanitas.

"Um, okay," Zack, muttered as Vanitas wrapped his arm around my waist.

"So, what do you want?" I snapped at Vanitas.

"Let's talk more privately…" He whispered as he started to support me while we are walking.

"There's nothing to talk about, Van." I went to get out of his grasp, but his fingers are digging into me. "Van, you are hurting me…"

"Hush!"

He took me into this other room where no one was really in there. It is dark and you couldn't make out who or what is in this room.

"Why are we in here?" I asked a little too loudly.

"Let's sit." He guided me towards a leather couch and he sat down, making me sit on his lap. There is a little light on us, so I can still see his face even though I still couldn't see the other people around us.

"I don't want to sit on your lap," I mumbled.

"But you would sit on Zack's lap," he hissed.

"Yeah."

Vanitas grunted and roughly pulled my face so I am looking at him. "I don't like how you are all over him."

"Why do you care? You have a girlfriend and a couple other girls!"

Vanitas stared deep into my eyes then he leaned in closer to my face.

"Van, what are you doing?!"

He ignored me and pressed his lips against my own. My eyes are widened. I am drunk and confused.

Why was he kissing me?! Why am I kissing him back?! Is it because I am drunk, or did I really want him?

Vanitas is the first to pull back and he stared at me with his yellow pupils. "Cagalli…"

I looked at him with widening eyes. "Why?"

He didn't answer my question, instead, he claimed my lips again, but this time he slid his tongue in my mouth… I couldn't pull back from him even if I wanted to. I needed him too badly.


	5. Chapter 5 - My Words Are Cold

Chapter 5

My Words Are Cold, I Don't Want Them To Hurt You

 *** "All the pain I thought I knew. All the thoughts lead back to you. Back to what was never said; back and forth inside my head." - Avril Lavigne –** ** _Take Me Away_**

"I've been wanting to kiss you for a while now…" Vanitas whispered in between our kisses.

"For how long?" I manage to ask as he kept forcing his tongue in my mouth. "Mph!"

He pulled back from my lips and stared deep into my green eyes. "Since we completely stopped hooking up."

"Oh…" I felt my head spinning and I rested my head on his chest. "I… Don't feel good."

"Are you going to throw up?" He asked gently.

"I don't think so…"

"If I kissed you sober, would you have kissed me back?"

 _That was a random question._ I thought to myself as I looked up at him. "I think… so."

"Do you still have feelings for me?"

I started to sob uncontrollably. "Why would you ask that?" I slurred.

"I just wanted to know…" He began to wipe my big fat tears with his fingertips. "I didn't know it was so personal, sorry."

"I loved you… Vanitas," I whispered.

Vanitas stopped wiping my tears and looked at me with widened eyes. "Cagalli?"

"Don't act so surprised… YOU KNEW! You know I still love you, but… You'll never love me back. I need to forget about you, Van!" I can't believe I'm confessing my love to my roommate! Stupid Rumple Minze!

"I knew you liked me back in high school, and I kind of figured you still have feelings for me, but I'm shocked to hear it from your own mouth."

"I'm drunk!" I blurted out.

"Ha, I know that." He laughed softly. "Why do you need to forget about me? What if I don't want you to?" He asked seductively as he leaned in to kiss me, but someone cleared their throat, making Van and I jump in fright.

"Awe, how cute!" A short-haired, blonde girl said mockingly.

"What do you want, Larxene?" Vanitas clenched his teeth.

"Your GIRLFRIEND wants to see you." She laughed obnoxiously.

"I'll see her later," he mumbled.

I felt anger well up in me. I don't know if it was because this Larxene chick mentioned Eva, or because the alcohol is taking over my body and emotions.

"She wouldn't be too pleased when she hears that you're making out with another woman." Larxene hummed.

"I got to go." I pushed myself off of Vanitas' embrace, fixed my skirt and left him. I heard Vanitas call out my name over and over again, but I refuse to turn around to look at him.

His kisses put me in a trance, but after hearing about Eva, it made me realize that I cannot be intimate with him anymore. I felt my heart beating inside me; I told Vanitas my true feelings… How stupid!

I went to find Zack or one of my friends, but someone pulled my arm from behind and pushed me against the wall.

"What?!" I went to scream, but Larxene put her hand over my mouth.

"Sh!"

I looked at her with widening eyes.

"You should stay away from a boy like him…" She purred as she removed her hand from my mouth.

"He's not a bad person…"

"How do you know?" She questioned.

"He's my roommate… I knew him for a very long time."

"Well, do you know what he's been doing?"

"What do you mean?" I felt my heart thumping slowly.

"LARXENE!" A voice shouted from behind us, it was the man that gave money to Vanitas in exchange for the brown bag!

"What, Saix?" She turned around and glared at him.

"Leave her be," he ordered.

"I was just talking to her," she said innocently.

"I said leave her be!" Saix shouted making Larxene and I jump.

I wanted to ask him how he knows Vanitas and what was in the brown bag, but they both are freaking me out. I felt a lot of tension between us and I decided to walk away from the scene.

As I am walking, I bumped into Kai.

"Cagalli!" Kairi gave me a huge hug. I can tell she is drunk because she is slurring her words.

"Hey," I whispered to her.

"Wow, you look drunk!"

"So do you," I smirked at my best friend.

"Oh, your boy is coming, I'll leave you two alone!" Kai walked away from me as I slowly turned around. I thought Zack would be the one behind me, but it is Vanitas instead.

"Hey, you want to go home now?" Van asked as he pulled me into his embrace.

"Um." I didn't know what to do. If I went home with him, would he try to sleep with me? I'm afraid I would give into him tonight, and regret it tomorrow morning…

"I won't try anything, I promise," he whispered. It's like he read my mind…

"Alright. I want to say bye to everyone, though!" I went to find everyone, but I tripped!

"Hey!" Vanitas grabbed my arm tightly and pulled me into him. "Geez, clumsy girl… Let's just go home. I think they'll understand why you left without saying goodbye."

"Alright." I slurred.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas helped me into his red sports car and he immediately got in the driver's side to take us home. He went over the speed limit as he is passing every car on the road. I felt my stomach forming into a knot. He is going way too fast for my liking!

"Van…"

"Yeah?"

"Slow… Down."

"Are you going to throw up?" He asked.

"No, I just don't want you to get a DUI."

"You worry too much, Cagalli." He lightly chuckled. He then put his hand on my upper thigh. My mind screamed for me to push it away, but I didn't want to.

I felt my body growing hot from his touch. I slowly put my hand on top of his, so he didn't let go of my thigh.

"Can you sleep with me tonight?" I asked innocently.

"Man, I have been in your bed almost every day now… Sure." He smirked at me.

"Thanks."

We stopped at a red light and Vanitas leaned closer to my face. I got the hint and did the same and our lips crashed with each other. We began to battle with our tongues for dominance as we both are groaning in between our kisses. We didn't want to break our kiss, but we are forced, thanks to the guy who laid on his horn from behind us.

Vanitas pulled away from my face and floored it. "Damn, someone always has to ruin it for us," he mumbled.

I touched my lips with my fingertips. "That was intense. Was it always like this?"

"You mean us kissing? I mean, it was crazy before, but I think since we both craved each other…"

"It got intense and more passionate." I interrupted.

"Yeah."

"Van?"

"Hm?"

"Would things get weird if we continued to kiss each other like this?"

Vanitas started to laugh. "It will only be weird if you make it that way, Cagalli."

"Okay…"

"Don't tell me you feel guilty about us kissing?" Vanitas asked.

"No, I don't feel guilty. Should I?"

"Hell no!"

I leaned back against the car seat and closed my eyes; we are almost home.

I prayed in my head that I would not give in to him. I cannot afford to be broken and used… I refuse to go back to being that depressing high school girl who cried every day because of _him_.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas parked his car in front of our apartment, and he rushed to open the door for me to get out. I slowly stood up and Vanitas wrapped his arm around my waist, so I wouldn't fall on the concrete. I glanced at our living room window while Vanitas is fiddling with the house keys and I couldn't help but gasp out loud.

"What is it?" Vanitas looked at me with concern in his eyes.

My mouth hung open as my eyes widened at the broken window. There is glass EVERYWHERE on our porch!

"Are you kidding me?! Vanitas yelled out as he turned the key in the lock and ran inside, dragging me behind him.

"Did someone break in?" I managed to ask while I saw more broken glass all over the living room floor.

Vanitas ignored my question and pushed me lightly on the couch. "Stay here! I'll be right back!"

"Wait, Van!" I didn't want him to leave me! What if the robber is still here?!

I kicked my shoes off and pulled my legs up to my chest. My arms are shaking while I wrapped them around my legs; I began to rock back and forth in a small little ball.

I then scanned the room and saw our flat screen T.V. broken and on the ground. A couple chairs lying upside down, and pictures I hung up all ripped and broken. Killer came limping in the living room as I kept myself wrapped up in a ball.

"KILLER!" I freaked as he slowly approached me. He has a dark blue material hanging from his mouth. He slowly set it down next to me.

I hesitated, but I grabbed the cotton material and stared at it. It looks like someone's T-shirt that got ripped off by Killer. It has a book imprinted on the shirt. Whoever broke in here, must somewhat like books…

"SHIT!" I heard Vanitas screaming from upstairs.

"Van?" I rushed upstairs to see a huge hole in the wall from his fist. Like the living room, the hallway is a mess too. Broken picture frames and pictures are lying everywhere.

"They took it…" He muttered to himself.

"Took what? Van, we should call the police!"

"NO!" He shouted as he punched the wall again, making the hole deeper.

"Stop!" I pleaded! I didn't hesitate to wrap my arms around his waist.

"Cagalli…" His voice is shaking. I can tell he is forcing himself to calm down for my sake.

"I'm scared…" I started to sob.

"Sh, it's okay. I'll check all the rooms to make sure they are gone."

"NO!" I freaked. "Let's call the cops and have them do it!"

"I don't want the cops here!"

"Why not?!" I slurred as I felt my head pounding from the alcohol.

"I just don't want them involved. Please, let me just look, and you wait in the living room with Killer…"

"Let me at least come with you!" I begged. "I don't want you to leave me all alone!"

Vanitas wiped tears away from my face and nodded. "Alright, just stay behind me…"

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas already checked his room before I came upstairs so we didn't have to look in there… We just checked our bathroom, my room, the dining room, and kitchen. The only room that is unharmed was mine, and nothing got stolen besides something that was in Vanitas' room.

I kept asking him over and over what that "something" was, but he wouldn't tell me! I wonder why they didn't trash my room? I mean I am happy they didn't, but it just didn't make any sense.

I told Vanitas about the ripped shirt Killer had, and Vanitas seems to know who it could've been, but of course, he didn't tell me who it was!

I treated Killer's wounded paw as I kept shaking in fear about the robbers. Were they still lingering in our home? Vanitas doubled checked each room for me while I waited in my room.

After I treated Killer's wound, I sat on the floor with my back against the wall. I couldn't stop sobbing after witnessing our apartment getting invaded like that…

"Cagalli?" Vanitas came in the room and frowned.

"Where's Killer?" I asked.

"He's sleeping on the couch. Why are you on the floor? Get in bed."

"I don't think I can," I said as I am violently whipping tears off my face.

"I checked everywhere. No one is here, and I'll stay with you all night. I won't even go to sleep just in case."

"Van, you sure we can't call the cops?"

"We don't need them." Vanitas slowly sat down by me.

"But…"

"Sh, you only need me; no one else, got it?"

I just shook my head "yes".

"Well, I'm going to change into something comfortable. I'll be right back. You should change too."

"Kay."

Vanitas rose up and left my room to change. I tried to force myself to get up, but my mind told me to stay sitting on the floor. My body couldn't stop shaking, and tears kept running down my cheeks.

This was not the night to get drunk; that is for sure…

Vanitas came back in my room wearing gray baggy sweats with no shirt on. He folded his arms across his chest as he is staring down at me. "Cagalli? Why didn't you change?"

"I'm too numb to move. Just let me stay here all night. I don't think I can sleep."

Vanitas huffed in frustration and sat on the floor next to me, he then patted his lap. "Sit on me."

"No…"

"Cagalli, just do it." He rolled his eyes.

I gulped as I clumsily sat on his lap. I rested my head on his beating heart and looked up at him.

"Are you comfortable?"

"Yeah," I whispered. My side of my face is hot from the touch of his bare chest.

"I'm sorry… Cagalli." Vanitas started to stroke my hair. "You are so scared… And…"

"It's not your fault we got robbed." I interrupted him.

Vanitas is silent, but he kept stroking my hair.

"Van?"

"Yeah?"

"You PROMISE you won't leave me tonight?"

"Yes, I promise. Don't worry." He looked at me and gently smiled.

I returned his smile as I felt warmth in my heart. "Thanks."

"Cagalli?"

"Yeah?"

He looked deep into my eyes and sighed. "I know what will take your mind off of tonight…"

"What?"

Vanitas leaned in and claimed my lips with his own. I didn't hesitate to slide my tongue in his mouth. We both moaned as our tongues kept intertwining with each other.

He is right, I did forget about the robbers and our apartment getting trashed. It's strange how something so tragic can be forgotten just by one kiss…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I woke up and realized I am in the same position as last night. I looked up at Vanitas and he is staring down at me. Did he seriously stay up all night? I wonder if his legs are numb from me being on his lap the whole night…

"You're awake," he whispered.

"Didn't you sleep?"

"Nah, I told you I would stay up to protect you…"

"Thanks, Van." I slowly got up from his lap and stretched.

Van stood up from the ground and pulled me into his embrace. "What are you doing today? We should get breakfast or something," he suggested.

I don't know if I can eat after witnessing our apartment being robbed, but it would be nice to get out of the house for a little bit with my roommate. "Um, okay. Sure!"

"Alright. Let's go."

"Wait, I need a shower first! I bet I look like a hot mess." I sniffed my armpits to see if I smelled.

"You look fine." He laughed.

"No, I need a shower. Please?"

"Okay, I'll change and wait for you downstairs…"

I tilted my head to the side. "Aren't you going to get a shower?"

"Are you saying I smell, or are you inviting me to join you?"

My face is starting to heat up. "Neither, I just thought you would shower…"

"I'll shower after we have breakfast. I'm starving so hurry up." He ruffled my hair before he walked out of my room.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I surprisingly enjoyed my hot shower! I felt relieved and stress-free all thanks to Vanitas.

I slowly got out of the shower and dried myself off, but something caught my attention. I heard muffled voices from downstairs.

I hurried and dried myself as best as I could, and threw on some light blue sweat pants and a hoodie that matched it. I then crept down the stairs to see whom Vanitas is talking to.

I sighed in frustration when I realized it was Eva.

I went to go back upstairs to leave them be, but the name "Saix" came in their conversation, making me stop in my tracks.

Why are they talking about that Saix guy? Was he involved with the robbing of our house?

Curious, I snuck in the dining room and leaned against the wall. I am next to the kitchen where Eva and Vanitas are talking, so I can hear them clearly.

"I told you to watch who you sell to, Van. I bet Saix was the one who robbed your apartment!" Eva spat.

"Sh, my roommate might hear you!" Van spat back.

What was Van selling, and why didn't I know anything about this? I felt my blood boil as I continued to listen in on their conversation.

"It's just strange how after you sold Saix coke and weed that you get robbed the same day!" Eva groaned.

"Saix was in the club, though…" He whispered

"Yeah, but he might have gotten someone else to do the dirty work for him."

"Cagalli found a ripped up t-shirt and I think it is Zexion's."

"Then Saix hired Zexion to steal your drugs…"

I felt my heart sinking. We got robbed because of Vanitas?! How could he do this to me? I should have known he was acting sketchy!

I began to think of all the shady things he did yesterday… One: He gave that brown paper bag to Saix. Two: Larxene told me he's no good. Three: He did not tell me what the robbers have stolen from him. And finally, four: He did not want me to call the police to search our apartment.

I wanted to rush upstairs to call Kairi, but then I thought, why should I? Van is the one who put ME in danger if anything I should flip out on him! I didn't care if I got caught eavesdropping on their conversation; he should care if HE got caught for what he did.

I slowly walked in the kitchen and folded my arms over my chest.

"Cagalli?!" Vanitas' eyes widened.

"How could you?" I tried my best to keep my voice firm, but it cracked instead.

"I…" Vanitas went to explain, but I cut him off.

"You put me in danger!" I screamed.

"They didn't even go in your room, though…" Vanitas countered.

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT! What if I didn't go out last night and I was home?! What would the robbers have done to me?!" I felt my whole body starting to tremble.

He put me through all this trouble. He didn't even care if I would be the one suffering the consequences of his actions…

"Stay out of this, Cagalli!" Eva hissed.

"No, this has to do with me since Vanitas got me involved too!" I hissed back at her.

Eva walked up to me and pushed me hard. "Don't yell at my boyfriend!"

"I can do whatever the hell I want, Eva!" I pushed her back.

"Both of you stop!" Vanitas shouted at us, but we both ignored him.

"You are just jealous because you WANT my boyfriend!" Eva smirked at me.

"Why would I want a boy who sells drugs?!" I snorted.

"Cagalli…" Van whispered.

"No, I'm sick of this, Van! I don't think I can live here anymore. I don't feel safe in my own home." Tears started to form in my eyes.

"CAGALLI!" Kairi came rushing in.

"Kai?" I whipped some of my tears away from my face.

"I have to tell you something!" She gave Vanitas a dirty look. "It's about him!"

"If it's about him selling drugs, I already know," I said in sorrow.

Riku, Sora, Zack, and Yuffie came in the kitchen out of nowhere and they all glared at Vanitas.

"How could you do this to her?" Sora asked Vanitas harshly.

"Why are you all in here?!" Vanitas gritted his teeth, ignoring Sora's question.

"To get Cagalli out of this mess that you put her in," Riku answered.

"She should move out, so I can be with my boyfriend," Eva chimed in.

"That's fine because I am moving out of here!" I would be having sleepless nights if I stayed here… This apartment isn't safe for me anymore.

"Good! Pack your shit and leave," Eva said as she leaned in close to my face.

"Don't get so close to me!" I pushed her away.

"Don't touch me!" She pushed me back.

"I think Cagalli needs to go somewhere to cool off," Yuffie whispered to Kai.

"Yeah," Kai agreed. "Cagalli, let's go back to my place. You can stay for a long while."

Eva began to laugh. "You are such a little wimp."

"SHUT UP!" I unexpectedly slapped her across the face. The slap is so loud that it echoed throughout the kitchen, and everyone grew silent.

"You… Slapped me." Eva touched her cheek.

"Cagalli, what the hell has gotten into you?" Vanitas asked.

"What has gotten into me!?" I laugh hysterically. "What HAS gotten into me is that you are a shitty friend and a shitty roommate. You are a lowlife who only thinks about your damn self! You will NEVER amount to anything in your life because you never try. You rather just sit here and sell drugs and get drunk every night. Have a good life with your stupid girlfriend and the two other girls you mess with because I am done being your best friend. I am moving out and I hope I never, ever see you again!"

"You can't leave," Vanitas said sternly.

"I can and I will!" I shouted.

"That means you can finally ask her on a date," Sora whispered to Zack.

I turned around to face Zack. "If you don't think I am crazy then I would love to go on a date with you."

"Um, yeah. I would love for you to go on a date with me…" Zack stuttered as his cheeks began to get rosy.

"Why would you go on a date with him?" Vanitas snorted.

"Why wouldn't I?" I asked.

"Well, you don't like him like that… You went home with me last night." Vanitas folded his arms.

"Well, I regret it," I said.

"Did you do anything with Cagalli?!" Eva interrupted.

Vanitas ignored his girlfriend. "Cagalli, can we talk in private?"

"What? And talk about how shady you are?! No thanks." I rolled my eyes. "I'm just sick of you hiding things from me and lying to me. I just really wish I never met you."

"You don't mean that…" Vanitas mumbled.

I didn't bother to answer him; instead, I turned my back on Van and began to walk out of the room to gather clothes to go to Kai's.

Maybe Vanitas is right and I don't mean that, but on the other hand, maybe I do. Vanitas put me through hell and he didn't even apologize.

He didn't even tell me the truth; I had to find out on my own! My friends would NEVER do that to me, and I wasn't even friends with them longer than I was with Vanitas.

Was he only pretending to care about me?! Does he really think so little of me? I think I should move on and find a new place to live. I can't keep letting my heart get broken every other day. I have to get him out of my life; he is just no good for me.


	6. Chapter 6 - I'm Not Bullet Proof

Chapter 6

I'm Not Bullet Proof When It Comes To You

 *** Maybe I'll crash into you. Maybe we would open up these wounds. We're only alive if we bruise. So, I lay down this armor. I will surrender tonight. Before we both lose this fight. Take my defenses, all my defenses. I lay down this armor for you. – Landon Austin -** ** _Armor_**

"Cagalli?"

I snapped out of my train of thought. "Ugh, what? Sorry…"

"Look, maybe we should've done this another time…" Zack said as he took a small sip of his coffee.

"No, no! I'm happy we went on this date! I just have been SO tired, you know?" I nervously laughed.

"Are you thinking about Vanitas?" Zack asked in a small voice.

"Of course not…" I lied.

A couple days have passed and Vanitas has been invading my mind ever since the last time I saw him. I refuse to go back to the apartment because I am still pissed at him, but I know sooner or later I will end up forgiving him.

"You don't have to lie to me. Kai and Sora told me you haven't been yourself ever since you fought with Vanitas about him selling," Zack sighed.

"It's just hard. I trusted him. I thought he was protecting me, but all he was doing was protecting himself… I thought… He. Cared." My voice trailed off.

"I don't know why you let yourself keep getting hurt by him. He's no good for you, Cagalli."

"I know that. I will forget about him soon. Will you be patient with me?" I looked at him with pleading eyes. I don't know if I will ever get over Vanitas, but I at least got to try.

"I usually would say no if a girl asked me that, but you are worth it… I will wait for you." He gently smiled at me.

I grinned at his answer. "Thank you! Let's not talk about him anymore… So what are you doing for the rest of today?"

"Um, nothing really. I think I'm just chilling with Cloud and Tifa."

"Cloud and Tifa are your roommates, right?" I asked.

"Yeah, I think Tifa is really in love with Cloud, but I can't tell if he likes her back…" Zack scratched the back of his head. "It's an awkward situation."

I felt a huge tug at my heart. I guess that "Tifa" chick and I are in the same damn boat. I tried my best not to react to his roommate's situation, but I think he can tell I am putting myself in Tifa's shoes.

"Do you like your two roommates?" I cleared my throat.

"Yeah, I love them both, a lot! I want you to meet them soon!"

"I would like that, Zack."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After Zack's and I's little date, Zack dropped me off at Kai's. The first thing I saw when I walked through the door is Sora and Kairi snuggling on the couch; I couldn't help but smile at the two. They're just so adorable.

"Oh, hey! How was your date?!" Kai asked.

"It was chill…" I sat on her incline chair. "What's new?"

Sora and Kairi sat up straight and ignored my question.

"Nothing new then?" I raised a brow at them.

"Well…" Kairi looked at me dead in the eyes.

"What happened now?!" I threw my arms in the air. I swear if it's about Vanitas, I am going to flip out!

"Riku found out from Larxene and Axel that Vanitas is also selling heroin." Kai frowned.

I felt my heart sinking. "But, Eva said in the kitchen about him selling weed and coke, that's it!"

"But, he also sells heroin, Cagalli," Sora muttered.

"I can't believe this!" I shouted as tears are streaming down my face. My best friend that I knew for years and years sells heroin. I thought I knew him so well, but I guess I don't.

"Do you know how long he's been selling?" I managed to ask them.

"No," they said in unison.

We all sat there in silence. The news I just heard broke my heart into a billion pieces. Vanitas is better than that! Why would he get involved in that type of situation?

Kairi cleared her throat. "We should go out."

"On a Monday? Look, I get you are trying to get my mind off of this situation, but I don't think drinking is a very good idea for me," I muttered.

"Ah, come on! We'll invite Zack!" Sora chimed in.

"No, you guys can go. I'll just stay here." Partying was the last thing I wanted to do right now.

"But, it will be fun with all of us together…" Kai whined.

"Please just go without me," I whispered.

"You sure?" Sora asked.

"Positive." I gave them both a weak smile.

The couple just nodded and we changed the subject about Vanitas selling drugs, but while they are talking; I tuned them out to try to figure out my stupid crush.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"You sure you don't want to come with us?" Kai asked as she is checking herself out in front of the mirror. She is wearing a pink mini skirt and a white long sleeve crop top.

"Yes, yes! You just enjoy yourself and don't worry about me. I need to binge on television and junk food." I giggled.

"Okay. If you need anything, don't be afraid to call Sora or me!"

"Sounds good… NOW GET!" I pointed at her bedroom door. "You are interrupting my T.V. time!" I said jokingly.

"Fine, fine!" Kai rolled her eyes. "SORA, LET'S GO!" She called out to her boyfriend who is drinking in the kitchen with Riku and Tidus.

"OKAY!" Sora hollered back.

Kairi and I walked into the living room to meet up with the boys. I said my goodbyes to everyone as they each gave me a huge hug. They then all left me to enjoy their night.

I kind of wished I went out with everyone, but after lying on Kai's comfy couch; I realized that staying in is the best option for me.

I didn't hesitate to go on Kai's Netflix account to watch a movie. It is hard for me to choose which movie to watch because there are way too many romance movies and trust me, that's the last thing I would want to watch with the mood I am in.

I finally found a scary movie, but I thought of Vanitas as I read the summary, especially when the information said "gore" three times! I rolled my eyes as I clicked play because I didn't want to keep searching for another movie.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"OH MY GOD!" I screamed out loud as I wrapped blankets around me to secure my body. This was a BAD idea to watch this movie by myself! WHAT WAS I THINKING?!

I covered my eyes at this really gory part where a man is getting sawed in half. It doesn't sound scary, but hearing him yell and cry in horror made the situation a lot worse!

"Man, I'm shocked you are watching this by yourself." A voice said from behind me.

My eyes widened and I froze in place. "Who… Who's here?"

"It's me, Cagalli…" That voice…

I turned around and glared at Vanitas. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

"I figured you weren't going out, so I came to see you."

"How did you get in here?" I can't believe he is standing here before me in Kai's living room!

"Kai's window." He shrugged.

"The reason why I am staying over Kai's is to get away from you," I muttered.

"We need to talk."

"There's nothing to talk about!" I shouted. "YOU SELL HEROIN!"

Vanitas inhaled and exhaled deeply. "Yeah…"

I felt the wind knocked out of me. My ribs are aching from his four-letter word. "So, it's true… It's not a rumor?!"

"No."

"Why? Who are you?! My best friend in the whole wide world would NEVER do that!"

"Cagalli, let me explain, please."

I shook my head. "No, there's nothing to explain. You sell drugs. I don't hang out with drug dealers!"

"I do it because I am broke!" He shouted. "If I don't sell then I can't afford the rent for our apartment!"

I gulped at his reasoning. "Van, if you need help with the rent then I can pay more of it. We don't have to split it equally."

"No, I won't do that."

"I rather do that than have you sell and put us in danger!" I argued. "Look, you know my mother pays my rent, I'll just ask her to pay a little more. It's no big deal. She'll understand."

"I said NO!" He yelled violently.

Tears started to roll down my cheeks. He is selling drugs because of money trouble…

"Cagalli…" He whispered as he slowly walked towards me.

I slowly sat up on the couch and stared at him with tears in my eyes. "Are you doing it?"

"What?"

"Are you taking the drugs too?"

Vanitas huffed and rolled his eyes. "No, Cagalli. I am just selling it!"

"I want you to stop. Let me at least get a job and help out with the rent. It's our apartment; let me help you out…"

"This is why I didn't want to tell you!" Vanitas snapped.

"It was a mistake that you didn't tell me!" I snapped back.

Vanitas sighed while he sat next to me on the couch. "Cagalli, please move back in with me."

"I'll only move in if you stop selling."

"I can't do that!"

"I thought you were making decent money at your construction job?"

"They are laying me off…" He frowned as he studied me with his golden orbs.

"BUT YOU HAVE BEEN WORKING THERE FOR YEARS AND YEARS!" I gasped. Vanitas always worked full time at his construction job. He is one of their best workers; I'm shocked they are laying him off.

"It doesn't matter. They laid off a bunch of people."

"Why don't you get another job?" I asked.

"Because nothing pays as good as my old job! Look, I don't want to talk about it anymore. I just want you to come home. I miss you and so does Killer." He sounded so sincere.

"I miss you both too," I whispered.

"Come home, please?" He pleaded coolly.

I bit my lip and sighed. "I don't know…"

"At least think about it?"

"Fine, but I might be thinking for awhile. This news really hurt me, Van."

"I understand."

"Good."

Vanitas put his arm around my shoulders and pulled my body into his. I felt the warmth of his body heat, as I smelled whiskey off of him like it was his cologne.

"Were you drinking?"

"I've been drinking since you left," he muttered.

I didn't say a word as I nuzzled into his body. In response, he pulled me on his lap. We cuddled in silence, and we turned our attention to the scary movie that is still playing on the T.V.

I would jump a little when a gross part is happening in the movie, and Vanitas would rub my back to soothe me.

I am not going to lie, but having Vanitas here with me is way better than being by myself.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"I can't believe them…" I heard Sora whispering.

"I told you he cares about her!" Kai said cheerfully.

"Yeah, that's why he's putting her in danger," Sora mumbled.

I opened my eyes and was confused on where I was. I then freaked when I realized I fell asleep on the couch and Vanitas is spooning me from behind! He has his arms tightly secure around my waist. I couldn't even breathe, to be honest.

"She's up!" Kairi grinned at me.

Sora and Kairi are standing before me, staring down at Van and me.

"Um, hi." I blushed. This is an awkward situation.

"What's he doing here?" Sora raised a brow at me and folded his arms over his chest.

"He snuck through Kai's window. I am just as shocked as you are," I answered.

"Yeah, that's why you two are cuddling!" Kairi whistled.

"We were watching a scary movie and I fell asleep with him here, that's all," I sighed.

"Mhm." Kai winked.

"Whatever, what time is it? How were the bars?" I asked curiously as I am trying to struggle out of Van's embrace.

"It was okay. It would have been better if you were with us. Oh, it's only four thirty in the morning." Kai stretched.

"Don't tell me you are moving back in with him?" Sora asked.

"I don't know yet…" I whispered.

"Please, at least think about it. We worry about you, Cagalli," Sora said.

"Don't worry, I am going to think this through. Thank you." I gently smiled.

"Well, we'll let you two cuties get some sleep," Kai joked as she left the living room, dragging Sora with her.

I wanted out of Van's embrace so I started to struggle more and more for him to unwrap his arms, but it was no use. He has a tight grip on me…

"Why are you trying to escape me?" Vanitas whispered seductively in my ear.

"You're up…"

"Your talking woke me up," Van said as he pulled me on top of him. I squealed and he playfully laughed at me while our foreheads are touching. We both are looking deep into each other's eyes; I fell in love with him all over again.

"Cagalli…"

I didn't answer as I continued to stare into his golden orbs.

"Please, move back in with me. I need you."

"I'm scared." My voice is shaky. I am afraid of getting robbed again, and I am afraid of those people he's been hanging with…

"I will protect you, Cagalli. I will make sure we never get robbed again, I promise." He wrapped one arm around me to make sure my body stayed pressing against his chest.

"No, we will get robbed again if you keep selling, Van. It's only obvious."

"Just trust me."

"I can't."

Van inhaled then exhaled quickly. "How about this. I will look for another job even if it doesn't pay as good as my old job then I will quit selling."

I felt joy well up inside me. "You mean it?!"

"Yes." He stroked my hair with his free hand.

"Thank you, Thank you!" I praised.

"So, will you move back in with me?"

I felt my heart beating slowly. "…Yes."

Vanitas grinned at me before he kissed me sweetly. "Thanks, Cagalli."

I returned his kiss. I can never stay mad at Vanitas even if I wanted to… I want to help him; I want to make sure he is going the right path. Vanitas is a good person deep down; he just needs a little guidance from me.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Cagalli, get up." Vanitas' voice rang in my ear.

"Ugh, five more minutes," I mumbled.

"No, we have to leave now, silly."

I opened my eyes and Vanitas' face is only inches apart from my own. I felt my cheeks getting slightly hot.

"Awe, you're blushing," he said teasingly.

"Stop teasing me… What time is it?" I yawned.

"Nine in the morning."

"That's it?!" I groaned.

"Well, I want to get breakfast, so let's go!" He shook me violently, so I wouldn't go back to sleep.

"Okay, okay. Cut it out!" I whined.

Vanitas chuckled as he slowly rose up from the couch, pulling me up with him. I left him in the living room to gather my things and to change into something decent since we are going out for breakfast.

I just threw on black leggings and a dark gray zip-up hoodie. Kairi and Sora are sound asleep in the bedroom, so I didn't bother to say goodbye to them, as I made sure I grabbed everything out of Kai's room. I closed her bedroom door shut and Van and I left her apartment in silence.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Van and I are in his red sports car to drive to IHOP since we are both craving chocolate chip pancakes.

There is no tension between the two of us as we are fooling around and singing songs from the radio. That's how it is with us, though. After every fight we have, things just go back to the way it used to be like our fights were nonexistent.

"Hey, remember when we tried to make homemade chocolate chip pancakes when I moved in with you and we made a mess and almost burnt the house down!" I nudged him as I started to reminisce about our past together.

"I told you, you put way too much flour in it." Vanitas chuckled.

"That was you, not me!" I argued as we both continued to laugh out loud.

It didn't take long until we finally reached IHOP. I am so happy we are here because my stomach is growling violently, making me blush. Van, on the other hand, is making fun of my stomach, calling me "Ms. Piggy".

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"FINALLY!" I shouted in excitement as our waitress put our food on the table in front of us.

"I hope you enjoy them!" The waitress grinned at us before leaving.

I am not shy on digging into my chocolate chip pancakes. I took a huge bite; letting the chocolate melt into my mouth. "Mhm." This is the best pancake I have ever tasted.

"Geez, you act like you are about to have an orgasm," Van smirked as he took a small bite out of his pancake.

"Shut up, they are really good!" I said with my mouthful.

"Your cheeks are so full right now." He chuckled.

I scowled at him as I violently chewed my food. It is very hard to get it all down my throat because I stuffed my face too much.

"Take your time, we have all day."

"I have to go to my one and only class today," I whined.

"You and I both know you are going to skip…"

"I can't skip. I already missed so many classes." I pouted.

"What's wrong with just missing one more?" He raised a brow.

"Ugh, I guess. What are we going to do today then?"

"We should drink," Van suggested.

"Where?" I asked as I took another huge bite of my orgasmic pancake.

"At home. It will just be the two of us."

"I don't think that's a good idea." Van and I just drinking in our apartment sounded like a situation I couldn't handle. I know I would get too drunk and he would take advantage of me!

"Awe, come on. It will be fun!" Van grinned.

I deeply sighed. "What are we going to drink?"

"Fireball."

"I don't know…"

"What? Are you afraid that I will take advantage of you?" He asked seductively.

I felt my face growing rosy. "N-No!"

"I promise you I won't even touch you inappropriately."

"Okay. Fine." I rolled my eyes. "And no more kissing!"

Van's eyes widened. "What, Why?"

I reached out and pressed my pointer finger on his lips. "No more kissing," I repeated.

"Alright." He groaned.

"When are we going to start drinking?"

"After we are done here," he answered.

"We can't drink! It's still morning!" I gasped.

"We used to do it in high school." Van shrugged.

"Ugh, fine. I take it we are drinking all day then…"

He just gave me a sheepish grin. "Of course."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Van bought a handle of Fireball and we are back at our apartment in no time. I trailed behind him as he fiddled with the house keys. I'm not going to lie, but I am excited to drink with Vanitas all day. We used to drink all the time back in high school; just the two of us, and it was never a dull moment.

Van opened the door and motioned me to walk in first. I giggled as I walked passed and sighed deeply. _I'm home._

"Miss our place?" Van asked.

"It's only been a couple days…"

"And?"

"Yeah, I missed it," I whispered.

"Ha. Good. Now let us drink!" He said while he walked into the kitchen to prepare our drinks.

I followed behind him and watched him carefully as he poured our drinks in cups. I wanted to make sure he didn't make mine strong.

"I'm making it really strong, just so you know," Van smirked.

"Please, don't!" I argued.

He ignored me as he put a lot of alcohol in mine. He then poured Dr. Pepper in it. I wished he AT LEAST did half alcohol and half pop, but no, he has to get me drunk on the first drink.

Van handed me my drink and poured Fireball in his glass, of course, he didn't add any chasers.

I sniffed my drink and gagged. "I'm making my own drink next time."

Van just rolled his eyes at me. "You would only put in half a shot if I let you do that."

"Would not!"

"Yeah, okay." He started to gulp his drink down.

I did the same, but I almost spit it out. I am still truly amazed how good of a drinker Van is…

"Keep drinking," Van said after he downed the rest of his drink.

"Ugh, fine." I started to chug my drink, but it is no use, so I just kept drinking big sips until it was all gone.

"Here, I'll make us another drink…" He grabbed my glass out of my hand.

"No, you'll make it too strong again!" I whined.

"Stop complaining. You love it when I get you drunk." Van smirked.

I scowled at him as I watched him make my drink strong yet again. He handed me my glass and filled his empty glass with straight up Fireball.

"Let's go in your room and watch a movie," Van said while he drank his drink.

"Let me guess, another scary movie?"

"You know me too well." He winked.

I just shook my head as we headed upstairs. Van made sure to grab the bottle of Fireball and the pop for us. I know for a fact that Van and I will finish that whole bottle before dinner. We ALWAYS finish a bottle when we drink together; it's like our little tradition.

"Go in the room and I'll grab a movie for us," Van ordered while he handed me the bottle and pop.

"Kay." Without hesitation, I went to my room and set the bottle and pop on my nightstand. I then sat on my bed, waiting patiently for him to come in.

"Got one." Van came barging in my room and started to set up the movie for us.

"Is it worse than the one we watched at Kai's?" I asked as I took swigs of my drink.

"A lot worse."

"Oh, geez… I really need to get drunk then," I mumbled.

"Baby girl, I'm getting you drunk no matter what," he said seductively as he played the movie. He then sat really close to me on my bed.

I chugged my drink and went to make a new one, but Van grabbed the bottle and my glass, so he could make it instead. I huffed as he mixing my drink.

"If you get scared you know what to do." He handed me my glass full of poison.

"What?" I played dumb as I took small sips. I knew he meant to cuddle with him when I get scared.

"You know what."

"No, I don't," I said innocently.

He just shook his head and started to pay attention to the movie. The first part of the movie showed a half-naked woman running in the woods at night and a masked man is chasing after her.

"I swear all scary movies begin with this," I said.

"Yep," Van answered while he gulped the rest of his drink down.

Without asking, I handed him the bottle and he immediately poured himself another glass full.

I studied Vanitas as he had his eyes glued to the T.V. screen. How can someone be so sexy without even trying?

My head is starting to feel fuzzy. Am I drunk already? Oh, no, that's not good; I only drank a couple drinks!

"You scared yet?" He turned his head to look at me.

Without thinking, I rested my head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around me.

"I feel drunk already," I admitted.

"But you aren't drunk enough," he whispered.

I finished the rest of my drink and Van immediately let go of me to make me another drink.

"Please, don't. I am already tipsy." I begged.

"I want you trashed." He laughed while he finished mixing my drink.

I took my glass and glared at it. "This is not a good idea."

"Just drink. I told you I'm not going to do anything to you." Van lifted me up so I am sitting on his lap.

"I don't want to sit on your lap." I frowned.

"Yes you do," he whispered in my ear.

I just gave into cuddling with him. I mean; that's all we are doing, right?

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The movie was over and Vanitas and I finished the whole bottle of Fireball. Of course, Van drank most of it but we are both drunk as hell.

"That movie was scary!" I groaned as I wrapped my arms around Van's waist. We are both lying down on my bed.

Vanitas only laughed as he pulled me on top of him. His heartbeat is beating so fast from the alcohol.

"You feel good?" He asked.

"I feel great." I giggled.

"Ha, me too."

My phone started to vibrate and I got off of Van to see who would be calling me. I thought it would be Kairi, but it was Zack.

Without thinking, I answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, what are you doing?" He asked.

"Oh, just drinking…"

"You are drinking late afternoon?" His tone of voice sounded disappointed.

"Yeah, I usually don't do this, but I figured why not!" I nervously laughed.

"Who is that?" Vanitas asked as he is still lying there.

I mouthed "Zack" to him.

Van just grunted and rolled his eyes.

"Well, I was going to ask you if you wanted to see a movie, but I guess you are busy." Zack's voice trailed off.

"Awe that would've been fun!" I whined. I haven't really been to the movies in such a long time especially with a guy.

"Maybe this weekend coming up?" He asked.

"Yeah, that would be cool," I answered.

Van sat up on my bed and pulled me into his embrace. "Get off the phone," he whispered in my ear.

I glared at him then sighed. "I'll talk to you later, but can't wait for this weekend!"

"Okay, we'll get dinner beforehand too!" Zack said.

"Sounds good." Dinner and a movie is a perfect date. Wow, he is such a nice guy…

"All right goodbye, Cagalli," Zack whispered.

"Bye, Zack!" I hung up the phone and grinned.

"What are you doing this weekend?" Van asked suspiciously.

"Going to get dinner and go to the movies with Zack," I answered.

"Why?" Van snorted.

"Why not? I haven't been to the movies in a very long time. It would be nice to go on a little date."

Vanitas didn't answer as he tightened his grip on my waist.

"Why are you holding me so tight?" I gasped.

"Because I like to hold you." He lied back down on the bed, pulling me with him. As usual, I am lying on top of him.

"What do you want to do now?" I asked. I love cuddling with him, but since I am drunk, I am full of energy.

"I just want to lay with you," he muttered.

"Ugh, okay, but I need to pee so I'll be right back!" I got out of his embrace and ran to the bathroom.

While I was preoccupied, I notice a small dirt mark on my foot. I wonder how that got there? Without putting much thought into it, I stumbled in the shower and turned the knob for cold water to wash the mark off, but the water blasted me and it is freezing!

I clumsily fell in the shower with a loud thump.

"Cagalli?" I heard Vanitas' voice outside the door.

I didn't answer him as I tried to stand up, but I kept falling down, the cold water is drenching me.

Vanitas opened the bathroom door and started to bust out laughing. "Why are you in the shower with your clothes on?"

"I tried to get this dirt mark off my foot and I kind of fell…" I slurred.

Vanitas walked up to the tub and tried to pull me up, but I playfully pulled him in the tub with me so he would get soaked too.

"Hey!" Vanitas shouted out as he fell on top of me.

We both stared at each other and began to laugh together. I felt goose bumps forming on my skin, but I didn't mind.

"We're drenched." I giggled.

"Yeah, thanks to you."

I stared deep into his golden eyes and he stared back at me. We are both lost for words and before I knew it, his lips are firmly on mine. I didn't pull away; I couldn't pull away, could I?

I wanted him too badly. We kept kissing as the showerhead kept drenching us, our lips are smacking and they echoed throughout the whole bathroom. I felt his metal tongue ring as I played with his tongue with my own.

"Cagalli…" He moaned as he kissed me back.

I moaned in return as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

He broke the kiss and studied me. "Let's continue this in your room."

I just nodded and we both got out. I turned off the shower and he took my hand in his.

He led me to the room, pushing me down on my bed. I panted as he took off his wet clothes. He is left with just his boxers.

"Damn, even my boxers are wet…" Vanitas muttered.

I stared at his tone body and sighed deeply. He looked down at me and smirked.

"Aren't you going to take your clothes off too?" He asked as he leaned into me.

"I… Um…"

Without saying another word, he grabbed my zipper on the hoodie with his teeth and slowly opened my hoodie. I felt myself getting hot as I watched him. He undid the zipper and let my bra and stomach be exposed to his lustful eyes.

"Vanitas…" I whispered.

He didn't answer as he pulled my leggings off my body in one tug.

"We can't." I covered my exposed body with my arms.

"We won't have sex. I just want to make you feel good for a second," he said.

"I don't know…"

"Take the hoodie off," he ordered.

I quickly obeyed; I took my arms out of the sleeves and threw it on the floor. I had on a mint bra and underwear that matched them perfectly. I looked at Van with pleading eyes as he stared back at me.

"Victoria's secret, huh?" He asked, claiming my lips with his own.

We began to kiss hungrily as we both explored each other's bodies with our hands. I felt his smooth skin and moaned into our kisses. He started to trail hot, steamy kisses down my jawline, to my neck. He began to suck and lick hard on my neck, making me arch my back.

"Vanitas…"

"Does it feel good?" He kept licking and sucking my neck roughly. I felt myself growing wet from his kisses.

"Yes." I moaned out.

I can sense Vanitas smirking in my skin as he licked down my body. He stopped above my panty line and began to suck above it. I thrust my hips, not caring if he is leaving hickeys all over me.

"I love how you react to me…" Vanitas laughed lightly and continued to suck and lick me.

"Mhm…" I am in heaven. This felt amazing; I couldn't get enough.

His phone out of nowhere; began to ring, killing the mood.

"Aren't you going to get that?" I asked.

"Nah."

I looked over and saw Eva's name on the front screen. "It's your girlfriend, answer it." I pushed him off of me and frowned.

"We can ignore it…" Vanitas leaned in to kiss me, but I covered his mouth with my right hand.

"Just answer it!" I shouted.

Vanitas sighed in annoyance and grabbed his phone. "Hello?"

There is a long pause before Vanitas answered her.

"No, I'm just chilling at the apartment. I want to be alone, though. I'll talk to you later," he muttered.

I couldn't hear what Eva answered, but it made Vanitas roll his eyes.

"No, Cagalli isn't here…"

I felt my heart sinking. He's lying to her and here I am letting myself get used. I just got in the moment with him, but his phone call brought me back to reality.

"Alright, I'll talk to you later, bye." Vanitas hung up the phone and frowned.

"I think you should leave," I whispered without looking at him.

"Cagalli…"

"LEAVE!" I shouted.

I heard Vanitas sigh as he gathered all his clothes and slowly walked out of my room, closing the door behind him. I almost gave into him. I'm actually grateful Eva called him because if she didn't, I would've had sex with him and regret it later.

Why do I put myself in these types of situations? I placed my right hand above my heart as tears started to fall down my face.


	7. Chapter 7 - I'm Gonna Make You My Enemy

Chapter 7

I'm Gonna Make You My Enemy

 *** Listen you're worthless, let me make this clear; I'm done with betrayal, I'm done with the fear. – I Prevail** ** _– The Enemy_**

I took a deep breath as I fixed myself in the mirror. I am wearing a cream sweater dress with matching leg warmers and brown boots that are knee length. I took my time to get ready because I wasn't prepared to face Vanitas. I haven't talked nor seen him since I yelled at him to leave my room yesterday, but I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, so I decided to head downstairs.

My feet felt heavy with every step I took down the steps. I am scared to even make eye contact with him.

"Cagalli?" I heard his voice from the kitchen, but I refuse to turn around and see him.

"I don't want to talk to you right now," I said as I crept by the front door to escape him.

"Don't tell me you are going to Kairi's after class?" He mumbled.

"I don't know yet."

"Please don't. I want to talk after class…"

"Vanitas, I at least need a couple more days before I can talk to you again." Before he answered me, I walked out the door. My heart is racing from just hearing his voice.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"So, Demyx is having a party tonight," Kairi said as she took a huge bite out of her bagel. She and I decided to get breakfast together before going to our classes.

"Isn't that Axel's friend?" I asked.

"Yeah, he throws killer house parties! It will get your mind off of what happened between you and Van yesterday."

"That's true…" My voice trailed.

"Awe, don't be down! Sora invited Zack!"

"Oh boy."

"Don't get sarcastic with me!" Kai frowned.

"I am NOT going if Van is going!" I took a big gulp of my morning coffee.

"I don't think Van will be there, but I know for a fact Axel and Seifer will be attending. Also, Sora, Tidus, Zack, and Selphie will be going with us."

"How do you know Van isn't going? His friends are going to be there…"

"Trust me, Cagalli, he won't go. He isn't too fond of house parties." Kai hummed.

"Oh, alright." I rolled my eyes.

"We are pregaming at Axel's so I'll pick you up around nine?"

"Kay."

Kairi started to gossip about all the people that are going to Demyx's party, but I am half listening to her because my stomach felt sick. Every time my stomach acts up, something bad is going to happen. It's just a house party, though. What possibly could go wrong?

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

For once in my life, I wanted my classes to last forever. I am back at the apartment and the first thing I saw is Van. I guess he was waiting for me, but I still didn't want to talk to him so I rushed upstairs and ignored him as he kept calling my name over and over again.

I am finally in my safe bubble also known as my room. It is still early, but I wanted to find a cute outfit to wear to this stupid party.

Everyone on campus is going to be there, so I at least got to look decent!

I started to raid my closet by throwing clothes all over the place, but something caught my eye right away! I found one of my favorite dresses. The length is very short on me plus it is VERY form fitting. The color of the dress is mint green and it is strapless. I always felt confident every time I wore this dress and tonight would be the perfect night for it!

"Cagalli?" I heard Van's voice from outside my door.

"What Van?" Why can't he just take a hint?

"Can I come in?"

"I told you this morning I need at least a couple of days before I can speak with you again," I said annoyingly.

I heard Van take a deep breath. "Just hear me out, okay?"

I knew he's not going to leave me alone, so I gave up. "Fine, come in."

Van slowly opened the door and casually walked in. "Hey."

"So, what do you want to say?" I asked as I scowled at him.

"I wanted to apologize," he whispered while he rubbed the back of his head.

I tilted my head to the side. "Oh?"

"I'm sorry about yesterday. I took advantage of you, and I shouldn't have touched you like that, but I can't help it, you know? Every time I'm around you, I get these urges no matter where we are. I do care about you, Cagalli… I just… I don't know…" Van paused and studied me, but I didn't dare give him a reaction even though I am shocked by his words… _He cares about me._ "I shouldn't treat you like how I treat my girlfriend and those other girls because you are better than them. You deserve the world, and I guess what I am trying to say is… Please wait for me."

"Wait for you?" I raised a brow. What does he mean to wait for him? I am so confused and started to question if he has been drinking or not because he wasn't making any sense.

"Wait until I can treat you the way you deserve to be treated," he said.

I couldn't help but snort at him. "Yeah, that will take AGES! You only care about yourself, Van."

"Have faith in me, Cagalli…"

It is rare for Van to even apologize, so I shouldn't be too hard on him, BUT I will not be in the same position like I was yesterday. I won't let him have his way with me…

I decided to play the "nice" card. What was the saying again; "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer"? Yeah, that's it… 

"Cagalli?"

"Whatever you say, Van. I guess I'll forgive you this time," I smirked at him.

He smirked back as he is eying my dress that is still in my hands. "You going out tonight?"

Damn, I don't want him to know where I am going! "Um, yeah."

"Where are you going?"

"I don't know. Kairi is picking me up and taking me to some random house party." I am NOT letting him know where the party is located!

Vanitas just nodded. "I see… I was going to ask if you wanted to get a couple of drinks at a local bar, but since you already have plans I guess we can do it some other time…"

"We shouldn't drink with just the two of us… Remember yesterday?"

He just sighed at my comment. "Yeah, you're right… Well, I'll leave you alone." Van's voice trailed.

"What are you going to do tonight?" I curiously asked. I didn't want him to leave me just yet…

"I'll probably stay in." Vanitas shrugged.

"You NEVER stay in."

"I just don't feel like going out, I don't know." He gently smiled before leaving my room.

 _Vanitas is staying in, since when?_

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is nine on the dot and Kairi is outside my apartment, honking her horn repeatedly to rush me. Thanks to her I almost tripped down the stairs!

I shouted my goodbyes to Killer and Vanitas before slamming the front door shut. Kairi kept honking her horn jokingly until I went inside her car.

"Finally!" She teased. "Oh, you look beautiful!"

"So do you, Kai." I playfully flicked her forehead.

"Thanks! Oh, Sora and the others are meeting us at Axel's for your information!"

"Is there going to be a lot of people pregaming at Axel's?"

"Yeah…" Kairi giggled. "I'm so excited!"

"I am too." I agreed as I started to mess with her radio. I hope I will not be thinking about Vanitas all night…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"KAIRI, YOU ARE GOING TO HIT THAT CAR!" I screeched at my best friend who is trying to parallel park.

"Sh, I can't concentrate if you keep screaming at me!" Kai whined.

We both kept arguing, not realizing Sora is standing on the sidewalk. He began to knock on the window to get our attention.

Kairi rolled down her window and grinned. "Hey…"

"I'll park it for you." Sora grinned back at his high school sweetheart.

"Thank you!" Kairi said innocently.

We both got out of the car, so Sora can concentrate, and it took him two minutes to park the car perfectly! Kairi scowled as Sora locked the car doors and twirled her car keys with his fingertips.

"Show off!" Kairi stuck her tongue out at him.

Sora wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "What would you do without me?"

"I honestly don't know…" Kai blushed.

"Okay, before you two get any more lovey-dovey; we should head inside," I said jokingly.

They both laughed and nodded. We then went inside the noisy apartment. To tell you the truth, Axel should have just had the party here. There are a lot of people around, and EVERYONE is wasted… The smell of alcohol and weed lingered throughout the whole apartment.

"Hey, guys!" Axel greeted Sora, Kai, and I. He couldn't stand straight; he is obviously wasted.

"Hey, Axel. Drunk already, I see." I chuckled at him.

"Man, you need to be on my level so you don't judge me," Axel said as he grabbed me by the arm and dragged me into the kitchen. I tried to protest because I didn't want to leave Sora and Kai, but it is no use.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I folded my arms across my chest as I studied Axel who is going through the fridge to look for something. He finally pulled out a bottle that is green and shiny. The bottle kind of looked like a mermaid's scale. It definitely caught my attention.

"What is that?" I asked.

"It's Smirnoff green apple! You will love it!" Axel grinned at me and poured me a glass full in a red cup.

"I can't drink that straight!" I whined.

"Sure you can! It really isn't that strong."

I sniffed it before taking a small sip. "Mhm!" He's right! It's not that strong at all! It just tastes like green apple. I began to gulp it down.

"I told you!" Axel cheered.

"Yeah, it's not bad…" I downed the rest of my drink until there was nothing left.

"Careful, though! It can creep up on you!" Axel warned.

"What do you mean?" I asked as I poured myself another glass full.

"I mean, if you keep drinking them like that you will surprisingly get too drunk and you won't be able to handle yourself," he explained.

"I'm sure I will be fine, but thanks for the warning." I rolled my eyes and downed the second drink.

"Just be careful, okay?"

"Yes, Axel. I will." I grinned. "So, why didn't you just throw a party here? There are a lot of people around."

Axel shrugged. "I should've, but I didn't know these many people would show up to pregame."

"Is that right…"

Axel poured me another glass full of that green apple stuff… Didn't he just warn me about pacing myself? A lot of people here are faded, so drinking until I'm tipsy shouldn't be a crime…

"So, I heard about you and Vanitas yesterday…" Axel smirked.

My eyes widened as I spit a mouthful of my drink back in my cup. "Who told you?!"

"It was only you two so obviously he did if you didn't."

"Why would he tell you!?" I felt my blood boiling.

"Calm, down kitty cat, it's really not a big deal. He needed advice and I gave it to him."

"Advice for what?" I raised a brow.

"I gave him advice about you. He was worried that you were still mad at him, so I told him to apologize. Did he do it?"

"Yeah…"

Axel's tilted his head. "Man, I'm shocked. He never admits that he's wrong, but I'm glad he listened to me."

"I guess…" I mumbled and took big swigs of my drink, not caring that I just backwash.

"I never saw him worry about someone else's feelings before," Axel muttered as he poured himself a glass full of Smirnoff.

I felt my heart skip small little beats. Is it true Vanitas cares about my feelings? He never cared about them before…

"Hey, guys!" Seifer approached us. He is slurring his words and just like Axel, he is belligerently drunk.

"What's up?!" Axel smiled at his best friend.

"Drinking and smoking! Hey, is Van going to Demyx's too?" Seifer asked.

I felt my heart drop. Van might be at this party too?! But, he told me he was staying in…

"I don't know. You know how he is; he never gives a straight answer." Axel shrugged.

"That's true," Seifer and I said in unison.

"CAGALLI!" Zack came out of nowhere and hugged me from behind.

"Oh, Zack!" I turned around to face him.

"Your face is all rosy," he commented.

"Huh?" I touched my face with my fingertips. My cheeks did feel hot… Maybe, I am starting to get drunk without realizing it.

"I told you it would creep up on you!" Axel tapped my head a couple of times.

"Yeah, I am starting to feel a little lightheaded," I deeply sighed.

"Well, it's good that you will be on our level!" Seifer chimed in.

I just giggled at the comment. I hope I won't get myself into any more trouble; I should at least find Sora and Kairi just in case I get myself into a bad situation.

"Hey, Zack?" I raised my voice.

"Yeah?"

"Let's see where Sora and Kairi are at, okay?"

"Sure!" Without hesitation, Zack linked arms with me and we headed to the living room to find my friends.

I scanned all over the room to find them, but it is very hard because there are a lot of people here! I easily spotted Kai's roommate, Olette, and Hayner.

There is also a heavy-set boy with black hair with them, I remember him being at Kai's place… I am pretty sure his name is Pence…

"See them yet?" Zack questioned.

"No…" I frowned as I kept looking around.

I see everyone and their mothers, but no sign of Sora and Kairi. I was about to give up and go back to the kitchen to hang out with Axel and Seifer, but then I heard Kai's loud mouth from across the room. She is talking to her good friend, Selphie. I grabbed Zack's wrist and dragged him to where they are.

"There you are!" Kairi smiled at us. "I'm tipsy, thanks to Tidus' mixed drinks he gave us!"

"I'm feeling it too!" I rubbed the back of my head.

"Where's your boyfriend?" Zack asked.

"With Tidus and Wakka… He'll be back, though!" Kai answered.

"Alright. I brought a bottle of Banker's Club. Would you guys like some?" Zack suggested.

"YES!" Kai, Selphie, and I screamed altogether.

"Okay, be right back." He winked before leaving us.

I started to feel even more lightheaded from Axel's sneaky drinks. I shouldn't drink anymore, but I didn't have the conscience to stop myself even if I wanted to.

Vanitas kept invading my mind ever since Axel and I talked about him. I wanted to text him, but what if he was with his girlfriend? I really do miss him, though…

Without putting too much thought into it, I took out my phone and began to text…

 **Me: I NEEDDDD You!**

My eyes began to get blurry as I tried my best to text my roommate. Am I really that drunk?

 **Vanitas: Where are you?**

 **Me: Axel's, we're going to… Demyx's!**

 **Vanitas: Oh, I see. I'll meet you at Demyx's then.**

 **Me: REALLYYYY?!**

 **Vanitas: Ha, yeah. Just give me a couple minutes.**

 **Me: Text me when you are there!**

 **Vanitas: Okay, drunkie.**

 **Me: I am not that drunk!**

 **Vanitas: Sure… ;)**

Wait, did I just make a bold move on Vanitas?! I NEVER make the first move with him, ever! Oh, man, this is embarrassing! He probably thinks I am being desperate…

"Here you guys are!" Zack came up to us and handed us each a red cup. He then poured himself vodka and passed down the bottle to share with us.

After begging my roommate to hang out with me, I shouldn't be drinking anymore, but staring at the bottle and watching my friends drinking, tempted me to have just one more.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Axel, Seifer, Kairi, Sora, Zack, Tidus, Wakka, Selphie, and I started to walk to Demyx's.

Demyx is only a couple houses down from Axel's so it is VERY convenient.

My legs felt like jelly and they are also very numb. I couldn't see straight either…

"You okay, there?" Zack asked as he wrapped his arm around my body to help me walk.

"Yeah…" I mumbled.

"I'll hold your hair when you have to throw up!" Kai hummed.

"I won't throw up!" I whined.

"Sure…" Kai giggled.

"Yo, so Van is coming to Dem's for sure!" Seifer said, as he is texting on his phone.

"Alright!" Axel cheered. "No party is fun without Vanitas!"

I felt my face getting flustered.

"That's strange, he told me he was going to stay in." Sora raised his voice.

"Guess he changed his mind." Wakka shrugged.

We all continued to walk in silence until we got there. Dem's porch is all crowded with smokers sitting on his stoop, talking amongst themselves.

I glanced at the windows and Strobe lights are violently flashing very brightly inside.

"He sure overdid it this time," Tidus said.

"Yeah, this might be the party of the year…" Selphie praised.

"What are we waiting for? Let's go!" Kairi grabbed Sora by the wrist and dragged him inside the house. Everyone else followed besides Zack and me.

"Want to follow them or?" Zack questioned.

"I'm going to stay out here for a little bit. I need fresh air, but I'll meet you inside!" I gently smiled at him.

"Um, okay. See you inside." Zack hesitated, but he left me alone to enjoy the fall breeze.

I sat down on the stoop, ignoring all the people crowded around by me. I am in my own little world waiting for Vanitas to get here…

"Cagalli?"

I turned my head to the side to see Vanitas slowly approaching me.

"There you are!" My voice rose without meaning to.

"What's up, Shorty?" He immediately sat really close to me on the stoop.

Without thinking, I rested my head on his shoulder. I can smell whiskey and weed off of his clothes.

"Wow, you are really drunk, huh?" He asked teasingly.

"Not at all," I said innocently.

Van took out a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. He offered me one, but I refused it; he shrugged and then lit his cigarette with his lighter.

"So, were you seriously going to just stay home all night?"

Van inhaled then exhaled smoke from his cig. "Yeah, why? Did you miss me?"

I felt my face getting rosy. "No!"

"Don't lie. You can't live without me," he smirked as he kept puffing on his cigarette.

"Whatever…" I muttered.

"So, what did you all drink?"

"That Smirnoff green apple Axel gave me, and Banker's Club that Zack offered me," I answered.

"Those are weak drinks…" He mocked.

"Okay, smart ass, what did you drink?"

"A whole bottle of Jack Daniel's."

"A fifth of it?!" I shockingly asked.

"Why are you so shocked?" Van finished his cig and tossed it down on the ground; he then casually stomped on it.

"I'm not but why aren't you tipsy?"

"I'm offended that you think I can't handle my alcohol…" He rolled his eyes.

"I didn't say that… It's only natural for a human being to get drunk by drinking a whole fifth!"

"Well, I'm fine. Want to head inside?" He offered.

"Sure."

We both went to go inside until someone screamed…

"VANITAS!"

We both turned around to see the third girl he's been messing with. Her name is Shiki. She's my age and has dark red hair. She is very tall and slender in stature. I never really liked her because she is very outspoken and obnoxious.

"Hey, Shiki." Van greeted coolly.

"I'll leave you too alone," I whispered as I turned my back on the two, but Vanitas grabbed my wrist tightly.

"You texted me that you need me and now you want to go off on your own?" He glared at me as he tightened his grip.

"That was before I knew that one of your bitches would be here." I snapped and pulled my arm away from his grasp.

"Did she call me a bitch?! That was rude!" Shiki huffed.

I ignored her as I pushed my way through the crowd to go inside. The house is a lot crowded than Axel's. I felt my anxiety getting the best of me as I kept pushing my way through. I hardly recognized anyone…

 _Where are my friends?!_

I finally see Zack, but he's talking to someone… A girl… I slowly crept by them to see whom he is talking too…

"It's so great to see you, Aeris!" Zack grinned at her.

Aeris? That name sounds so familiar… OH, YEAH! That's the girl he mentioned at the bar! She's his ex-girlfriend…

I guess they still talk here and there. He must not be over her. I couldn't help but be happy for him because she is very beautiful!

Her hair is very long and brown; she also has amazing bright green eyes.

Before I got caught snooping, I hurried and left the two alone. I couldn't be mad at Zack. I liked him a lot and I always thought he is a nice guy, but I know deep down inside me, I would always choose Van over him. It sucks, though, I'm all, alone with a whole house full of crowded people.

"Cagalli?"

Wait, someone is calling my name? I turned around to see Yuffie.

"Hey, Yuffie!" I gave her a weak smile.

"You look stressed!"

I deeply sighed. "I just hate crowded parties…"

"Well, my friends and I are in the basement and it's not as crowded there, so you should hang out with us…" She offered.

"I would like that, thanks!"

Yuffie flashed me a cheesy grin. "Okay, follow me!"

She grabbed my wrist and guided me through the crazy crowd of students. I definitely feel bad for Demyx who has to clean up this whole apartment tomorrow…

"Watch your step!" Yuffie shouted as we headed down to the large basement. I listened to the shorthaired girl as I took my time down the stairs. There are plenty more strobe lights blinding us in the basement.

Yuffie dragged me to where her friends are sitting. I, of course, didn't know any of them.

Yuffie cleared her throat. "Hey, guys! This is one of my friend's, Cagalli!"

Her two friends gave me a small smile. A man who has long brown hair held his hand out for me. "I'm Squall, but people just call me Leon."

I accepted his handshake. "Nice to meet you."

The raven-haired girl next to him stood up and gave me a friendly hug. "I'm Rinoa! Leon's girlfriend!"

"Nice to meet you." I gently returned her hug.

"Girlfriend?" Leon's face got bright red.

"You guys are practically dating, hush!" Yuffie commented.

Rinoa giggled as Leon closed his eyes and sighed. I can tell they are both seniors because they both looked very mature.

"YUFFIE!" A voice yelled out to her.

"Oh, hey Demyx!" Yuffie greeted.

"Is this Vanitas' roommate?" He asked as he eyed me from head to toe.

"Um, yeah. How do you know me?" I managed to ask.

"Axel and Seifer told me about you!" Demyx roughly patted me on the back.

"I see…" I clenched my teeth as he kept hitting me on the back.

"Where is Vanitas anyways?" Demyx muttered.

"Here." Vanitas slowly walked up to us and folded his arms over his chest. "Cagalli left me alone, so I had to find her."

"So you play hard to get?" Dem raised a brow at me. "I like that!"

Vanitas grabbed my arm and pulled me to his side. "Don't leave my side anymore, clear?"

"Why do you care where I go? You were talking to that Shiki chick." I slurred as I leaned against him.

"Because you called me and I am not making a trip here for nothing," he said as he dragged me away from Yuffie and her friends.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Out in the backyard. It's too crowded in this house." He replied.

I couldn't argue with him on that one. I was over this party. There are too many people here and I am too drunk to handle this situation. I thought I would be able to sober up by now, but I guess not. I actually feel a little worse…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I leaned side by side against the back door. There are people out in the backyard but it isn't as crowded as inside the house, so we are both satisfied.

"Want to ditch this party soon?" Van asked.

"Yeah, I'm over it…" I just want to go to bed.

"Awe, you can't leave… Things are just heating up!" A voice mocked from the side of the house.

"Who is that?" I asked Van.

"Larxene," Vanitas grunted.

"That's right…" She walked up to us and smirked.

"What do you want?" Van snapped at her.

"I heard you know who broke into your house, and I was ordered to do something about it." She chuckled.

"What are you going to do?" I panicked. Is she going to attack us?

"Vanitas!" Axel and Seifer rushed over to us. "Zexion is here!"

"Zexion?" I raised a brow at the two.

He was the one Vanitas and Eva thought broke into our apartment, right?

Before they could answer my question we all heard screaming coming from inside the house. Axel, Seifer, and Vanitas all rushed inside leaving me to trail behind them.

"Why is everyone screaming?" Dem asked as people in the living room all backed up against the wall. A boy with short blue hair is standing in the middle of the room.

"Cagalli, stand back!" Vanitas pushed me against the wall with the others.

"Wait, why?!"

"Vanitas," the blue haired boy said coldly.

"Zexion…" Vanitas mumbled.

So, this is the boy who broke into our house… What is he doing here?!

Vanitas didn't hesitate to charge at Zexion, but Zexion hurried and pulled out a gun and aimed it at Van.

"Van, no!" I shouted out while I ran up to Van.

"Oh, is this the girl you care for?" Zexion laughed humorously as he now is pointing the gun at me! "Then I guess I'll take her life instead of yours."

I felt my knees giving out on me while I stood there with widened eyes.

My life is going to be taken away from a stranger I do not know. Is this how my life is going to end?

I closed my eyes and heard the gun go off, but I didn't feel pain… All I felt is pressure and in a blink of an eye, I am on the cold ground.

 _Did someone push me?_

I slowly opened my eyes and gasped out loud. Vanitas is on top of me and I felt warm liquid on my bare legs. Is that his blood?

"Van? Van?!" I slowly sat up on the ground, and Van loosened his grip on me… He isn't answering me and his eyes are closed. I began to sob uncontrollably as I screamed in horror…

The love of my life lied lifelessly on my lap. "VANITAS!"


	8. Chapter 8 - But Baby I Surrender, It All

Chapter 8

But Baby I Surrender, It All

 *** I feel your lips move in and they take me under. You know just what to do, how to make me want you, and I know I'll be broken when it's over. Oh, but I can't help but pull you closer – Bea Miller – Force Of Nature**

I felt as if my world is crumbling down, and time just stopped. Everyone's screams and shouts are faint. My only focus is on Vanitas who is lying lifeless on my lap. I saw more blood all over my body. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even call out his name because I couldn't speak… There is a huge lump in my throat.

I wish I were the one who got shot and not him… But, something shocked me; his heart is beating slowly…

 _Is he still alive?_

I studied him as he slowly opened his eyes.

"Cagalli… Run." He ordered weakly.

I felt tears running down my face. "Are you crazy?! I'm not leaving you; I can't lose you, Vanitas!"

"Just go!" He gritted his teeth and began to rise up from my lap, but I wrapped my arms around him, so he wouldn't stand up.

"No, you'll die and I can't live without you…" I squeezed him tight.

"Axel, get her out of here!" He yelled out to his best friend.

Axel didn't say a word, but he hurried and pulled me off the ground, making me let go of Van.

"Stop, let go of me!" I shouted in anger, but Axel is way too strong. I couldn't break out of his grasp.

I looked over at Zexion and he had his gun pointing at Axel and me, but before he had time to shoot, Leon, tackled him on the ground, causing the gun to slide across the floor.

"Let's get out of here. Trust me, Vanitas will be alright. He has people to protect him, Cagalli," Axel told me softly.

"But, I don't want to leave him here…" I slurred. I felt my pulse beating fast inside me, and of course, I am still belligerently drunk.

Axel ignored me and repositioned me in his arms. He is now carrying me in a bridal style.

As Axel is fleeing from the scene, I looked behind us and saw everyone jumping Zexion for his foolish actions. I tried to look for Vanitas, but I couldn't spot him.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Axel and I are back at my apartment. We both haven't spoken to each other since we left the party, but he is taking good care of me. He made me coffee from the Keurig, wrapped a warm blanket around me, and now he is in my room finding me a change of clothes since I had Vanitas' blood all over my mint dress.

I should get a shower because his blood is also on my body, but I couldn't move from the couch. I felt like I am paralyzed.

"Cagalli…" Axel returned and laid plaid sleep shorts plus a black long sleeve thermal on my lap.

"Thanks, Axel," I muttered.

"He'll be fine," Axel whispered while he sat next to me on the couch. "He's a lot stronger than you think."

"I know, but I just can't believe he got hurt because of me." My voice trailed.

"Don't blame yourself. I knew he would risk his own life to protect you. You are the only person who he would save. He isn't as selfish as you think, you know."

"Yeah, but I kind of wish he was selfish tonight…" I sighed. "I'm so weak, Axel…"

"Cagalli, there was no way you could've protected him from Zexion. He had a gun, for heaven sakes!"

"I guess…" I reached out to grab my coffee from the coffee table. I then began to take small sips…

Axel and I sat in silence until the doorbell rang. He immediately got up to see who it was. I wanted to trail behind him, but he made me stay sitting on the couch.

"CAGALLI!" Kairi came rushing in the living room.

"Hey, Kai." I gave her a weak smile.

"Rinoa texted me about the party! I am so sorry I wasn't there for you; Sora and I left early because it was too crowded," Kairi explained.

"No, it's fine. I just wished Van and I left sooner too," I whispered.

"Where's Sora?" Axel asked.

"He's on his way with Riku. How about Vanitas?" Kairi sat next to me on the couch and wrapped her arm around my shoulder.

"Seifer should be here any minute with him. I'm going to call Seifer to make sure everything is alright. Be right back." Axel left the room to talk to his friend in private.

"Thanks for coming over, Kai." I rested my head on her shoulder.

"Of course! I am your best friend in the world, you know!" She gently smiled at me.

"Is it sad that I'm still drunk?" I felt guilty for getting this drunk. I should've known! I did have a bad feeling something was going to happen tonight!

"No, not at all."

Kai and I both heard soft knocks at the door and we both went to see whom it was. I was praying it was Seifer with Vanitas, but it was Riku and Sora instead.

"Hey, Cagalli." Riku examined me. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, thanks to Van," I sighed.

"You sure?" Sora questioned.

"Yes, please make yourselves at home. Do you guys want coffee? I can make you some." I offered.

"We'll make it ourselves, but maybe you should get a shower. I can help you clean up if you want?" Kai asked.

"No, I can do it myself. Thank you, though." I went back in the living room to grab my Pajamas that Axel picked out for me and headed upstairs to take my shower.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I watched his blood go down the drain as I lavished my hair with shampoo. Usually taking a shower when I'm drunk was the best thing to do, but after what all happened tonight, I couldn't enjoy it, and seeing Vanitas' blood slowly getting off my body is not helping.

I hope he's okay. I wonder if Axel got a hold of Seifer?

"Here he is!" I heard Axel's voice from downstairs.

I felt my heart flutter and I hurried and washed the rest of his blood off of me.

It has to be Vanitas that Axel's talking about, right?

After, I was done with my shower; I threw on my PJ's and rushed downstairs to see Seifer and Vanitas on the couch while Riku, Sora, Kairi, and Axel are hovering over them.

"We should tend to his wounds," Kai suggested.

Everyone is softly talking amongst themselves, besides Vanitas. Van is staring right at me; he didn't even blink, but I couldn't tell if he is in pain, angry, or upset because he just had a blank expression on his face.

"Van?" I slowly walked up to him.

He rose up from the couch, even though he is struggling, but he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his embrace.

His head rested on my shoulders and I felt his teeth clenching from holding back the pain.

"Van, maybe you should sit back down," I muttered.

"No, I want to hold you for a little bit," he said.

"But you are in pain…"

"I'm fine," he grunted.

"Vanitas, sit down so we can bandage your wound better," Seifer ordered.

Vanitas huffed and slowly lied down on the couch. He is struggling to take his top off, but I rushed to help him pull it over his head.

There are bandages wrapped around him, but his blood is seeping through. Seifer got scissors and cut the used bandages off of his body.

"Yuffie and Selphie already took the bullet out of him," Seifer explained to us.

"Well, that's good," Axel, said as he studied Van's body.

Vanitas looked up at me and gave me a gentle smile. I think he can tell I am going to break down and cry.

There is so much blood. The bullet wound is in his rib cage on his right side.

"I'm fine Cagalli," he whispered, but his soothing words did not help. I began to bawl my eyes out.

"It's all my fault! I'm so weak, Van!" I felt my body trembling.

"Cagalli, you aren't weak…" He tried to sit up, but Seifer forced him to stay lying down.

"I have to change the bandages, Van," Seifer said.

"Fine." Van rolled his eyes as Seifer began to wrap new bandages on him. "Still drunk, huh Cagalli?" Vanitas asked teasingly.

I sniffed. "No…"

"Okay, liar." Vanitas snorted.

"Aren't you still drunk too?" Riku questioned.

"I was never drunk!" Van spat.

"Shouldn't we take him to the hospital?" Sora interrupted.

"He doesn't want to go," Seifer made sure he layered bandage after bandage so the blood didn't go through.

"Why?" Riku chimed in.

"Because he rather stay here with Cagalli," Seifer simply answered.

"Awe!" Kairi squealed.

"It's not a big deal…" Vanitas' face began to get beat red.

"I think you should go… I'll go with you," I whispered.

"No, I just want to be in my own bed, in my own house," Vanitas grunted.

"Okay, crabby," Axel smirked. "What should I say to your girlfriend? She's been blowing up my phone."

"Just tell her I went to sleep. I don't want her here," Van said coldly.

"She's been texting me too." Sora is looking through his phone.

"Shiki and Alexia are texting me," Riku rolled his eyes.

"I don't want anyone here, but you guys," Vanitas said.

"Aye, Aye, Captain." Axel jokingly saluted him.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Everyone is still here and I am not going to lie, but it helped Vanitas so much.

They all lightened the mood throughout the house. We all talked about useless things and joked about good times we all shared together.

Vanitas and I would steal glances from each other, but I wonder what he is thinking? He's playing off that his injury is no big deal, but he doesn't have all of us fooled. That's Vanitas, though, always acting tough.

"Do you want us all to sleep over, Van?" Sora asked.

"Nah, Cagalli can take care of me," Vanitas answered.

"You sure?" Riku raised a brow.

"Positive," Van smirked.

"Seifer and I will at least take you upstairs to your room," Axel suggested.

"Alright," Van muttered.

I watched as Axel and Seifer helped Vanitas off the couch. They are both on each side of him, and Van wrapped his arms around their shoulders. They slowly walked up the stairs while I said my goodbyes to Sora, Riku, and Kairi.

Kairi told me to text her if I needed anything, but I reinsured her that we would be okay.

I kind of wished Vanitas would sleep in my room, so I could have a watchful eye on him, but he loves his king sized bed.

Vanitas doesn't let ANY girl in his room even Eva hasn't been in there. He says his room helps him escape from reality, so he doesn't want anyone, but himself and his two guy friends in there.

I honestly don't even know what his room looks like; it's like a secret laboratory.

"Cagalli!" Axel called my name as he walked down the stairs.

"Yes, Axel?"

"Have your phone with you just in case you need Seifer and me," he ordered.

"Understood." I nodded.

"He's in a lot of pain, but he sure is holding it in…" Seifer muttered as he joined us downstairs.

"He's really strong," I whispered.

"Yeah," Axel and Seifer said in unison.

"Well, We'll leave you alone with him. Don't hesitate to call us!" Axel waved bye to me.

"Got it!" I escorted them out of the house.

 _Vanitas and I are officially alone…_

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I talked to Vanitas outside his bedroom door to make sure he is fine, and all he told me was that he is going to sleep and he'll talk to me tomorrow morning.

I sighed in frustration and went in my room since I wasn't getting anywhere with Vanitas. I wished he didn't play the "Big Boy act".

I know I will not be getting any sleep tonight. One, I am too drunk and Two, Vanitas being in pain is haunting my mind.

I lazily lied down on my bed and stared at the ceiling.

I then heard my bedroom door open; startled I sat up from my bed and saw Vanitas struggling to walk in my room.

"VAN!" I jumped out of bed to run to his side.

"I'm fine, geez," he whispered.

"Do you need anything?"

"You," he said simply.

I felt my heart beating hard and slow. "What?"

Without answering me, he crashed his lips on my own. He didn't hesitate to stick his whole tongue inside my mouth. I pulled back from his hunger kiss and panted, but he tried to kiss me again, which caught me off balance. I fell on the floor and he is staring down at me.

"Vanitas, please stop!" I looked at him with pleading eyes. "We can't do this… This is wrong!"

Vanitas pinned me on the floor and is only inches away from my face. I can smell whiskey off his breath.

He is staring at me with his piercing yellow eyes and they are hypnotizing me.

We both are pretty intoxicated and things between us are escalating quickly.

"Cagalli, I know you want me. The way you look at me. You can't deny it. You don't just want me, but you need me. I need you too," Vanitas mumbled as he leaned closer.

"Vanitas…" My voice trailed off while he claimed my lips with his own.

I felt my whole insides burning in flames as we both kissed each other deeply. Both our tongues are moving in sync.

I couldn't help myself but moan into the kiss, and I felt his lips smirking against my own.

He unpinned my wrists and began to roam his hands all over my body. His gentle touch is pushing me off the edge. He is right, I want him; I want him so badly.

"Gah!" Vanitas clenched his teeth. Is it from his wound?

"We should stop. You're hurting." I panted.

"Ha, excuses." He rolled his eyes at me.

"No, it's not! I want this, even if I regret it in the morning…" I argued.

"Why would you regret it?" He asked, but his voice sounded… Hurt?

"I just don't want to get used… That's all."

"I won't use you, Cagalli… I need you in my life, idiot."

I gently smiled at the "idiot" comment. "Alright…"

"We don't have to, but I know you want this too… I won't pressure you, though."

"No, I want to."

Vanitas stared deep into my eyes and leaned into my neck. He began to run his tongue up and down my neck. My body started to shiver; it felt amazing.

He then suck and bit my neck, making my back arch.

"Van…" I moaned.

"I might leave a mark on you…" He muttered into my neck.

"I don't care." Him leaving a hickey is the last thing I was worried about.

As he kept sucking my neck, he began to lift my thermal over my head. I am exposed in my black lacy push-up bra.

He trailed kisses towards my breasts, and without hesitation, he undid my bra, roughly and threw it to the side. He began to suck my left breast hard.

I wrapped my arms around his neck; I couldn't stop myself from softly moaning in his ear as he kept sucking my breast.

"Keep moaning. I want to hear your voice over and over again." He lightly bit my breast, making me gasp out loud. He then did the exact same thing to my right breast.

"I don't know how much more I can take. I want to be one with you, Vanitas," I confessed.

"We are taking this slow… I want to do this all night until the break of dawn," he said as he pulled my sleep shorts down. He slid his fingers up and down my forbidden area through my thong. I bit my lip as he kept doing it over and over again.

"Hm, maybe you are ready, but…" He paused and pulled my underwear down. "I want to lick you." Vanitas lowered himself down there and licked all around; his silver tongue ring is cold against my sex, but it felt amazing.

"Van, please!" I begged.

"Sh. Don't rush into things…" His tongue pumped in and out of me. I felt like I am going to faint. I am seeing white lights.

"I'm going to…" I screamed out loud as I released.

I felt Vanitas' tongue still licking me, and he finally rose up, licking his lips.

"You taste sweet," he smirked. "Shall we continue, or do you want to stop?"

I sat up on the floor and crashed my lips with his. The kiss is very passionate, but it didn't stop me from taking his shirt off…

"Cagalli…" He murmured.

I stared deep into his eyes. "Yes?"

"I need you now…"

I gently smiled at him and I started to fiddle with his spiked belt. I then unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. I can tell he is too anxious because he pulled his pants down along with his black boxer briefs.

His length is sticking out and it is rock solid, but what really caught my eye is the silver piercing on his head.

"Wait, when did you get this pierced?" I asked curiously.

"A couple years ago…"

"Why haven't you told me about this before?"

Vanitas just shrugged. "I guess I wanted to surprise you."

I hesitated, but I reached out and touched it. "Does it hurt?"

He snorted. "Of course not. It makes it feel one hundred times better."

"Oh… Will it feel funny inside me?"

"Let's find out," he said seductively as he roughly turned me around.

I went on all fours as he circled his length around my entrance. I then felt some pressure inside me and he began to slowly rock back and forth. I felt his piercing hitting deep inside me, but it felt… Different. I actually like it…

"Van, go faster."

He did as I ordered and began to pick up the pace. He violently grabbed my hips and thrust in and out, but I heard him growl in a low voice. I can't believe I forgot all about his wound!  
"Vanitas, stop!" I secretly didn't want him to, but I didn't want him hurting either.

"I'm fine…" He kept pumping in and out of me.

"No, lay down, please…"

Vanitas' stopped and sighed. He then laid his back on the floor. I crawled on top of him and guided his length inside me.

As soon as his length was inside me, I threw my head back. He is filling me up inside; it is driving me crazy.

I grinded back and forth, making, myself moan out loud. Vanitas buckled his hips up to meet with every thrust.

"No, don't move." I scowled at him.

"It doesn't hurt, though."

"Just let me take the lead, okay?" I began to pick up the pace, feeling my climax coming. I knew for a fact that Vanitas is far from his, but I will do everything in my power to get him to release too.

"Ugh…" I released all over him.

He lightly chuckled. "You are probably exhausted. Lay down, it's my turn."

"No, I'm fine," I lied. I am getting tired, but I wanted him to enjoy this without him being in pain.

Vanitas, in one motion, sat up and threw me on the ground. He then got on top of me. "Relax." He guided himself inside me and rocked back and forth.

Our foreheads are touching; our eyes locked with one another.

I heard him whimper, but he tried his best to put on that he isn't hurting.

I tried to budge him off me with my hands, but he wouldn't move. I am really weak compared to him…

"Don't worry… Almost there." After a couple more thrusts, we both reached our limit.

He rolled off me and looked up at the ceiling. I scooted over to him, resting my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to his body. I nuzzled into his chest as I deeply sighed.

"So, did you like my piercing?" He asked.

I looked up at him and blushed. "It was different…"

He immediately frowned. "Do you want me to take it out next time?"

"No, I liked it! Leave it in, okay?"

"Ha, okay…"

Vanitas closed his eyes, and fell asleep I, on the other hand, am wide-awake. I studied his sleeping face; he looked so innocent like he didn't have a care in the world. I didn't realize how long his eyelashes truly are, and I fell in love with the small smile he has across his face.

I wish I knew what he is dreaming about, but I didn't mind watching him sleep instead.


	9. Chapter 9 - I Pick My Poison & It's You

Chapter 9

I Pick My Poison & It's You

 *** This bittersweet ecstasy that you got me in; falling deep I can't sleep tonight, and you make me feel like I'm out of my mind. But it's alright, it's alright, it's alright. – Rita Ora –** ** _Poison_**

I am in the shower washing my body off violently because I wanted to clean my sins off from last night. When I woke up in my bed, Vanitas was nowhere to be found. He must've gone out with his girlfriend or something…

Is he going to act like last night never happened? I shouldn't be surprised, I knew this was going to happen, but I gave into temptation anyways…

As I started to apply conditioner to my hair, Vanitas pulled the shower curtain wide open.

"VAN!" I screeched. I thought he went somewhere?

"Room for one more?" He asked seductively.

I turned my gaze away from him, feeling my cheeks burning. Why is he teasing me right now?  
"Don't tell me last night was a one-night thing…" Van said coldly.

"I thought you would forget about last night." I countered.

"Why would I forget about it?"

I looked into his eyes and sighed. "I don't know…"

"Well, we should do it again… Right here, right now," he smirked.

"That's not a good idea, Van." I frowned.

Vanitas leaned in and kissed me hungrily on the lips. I mentally kicked myself for how much his kisses take effect on me, and I REALLY kicked myself for kissing him back… Lust is truly taking over my body.

"You loved it last night… Your moans, the way you said my name…" His voice trailed off as his thumb brushed against my bottom lip.

"Get in here," I whispered. I'll regret the consequences later. One more time shouldn't hurt, right?

Van smirked as he hurried and stripped himself of his clothing. He is fully naked in front of me; I couldn't help myself from staring. I am so turned on by just looking at his beautiful body.

He joined me in the shower, and roughly pushed me against the wall, pinning my arms above my head. "I wanted to have fun with you as soon as I woke up, but you looked too innocent sleeping," he mumbled and pressed his lips on mine.

I moaned in his mouth, as his tongue is playing with my own. He still had my arms pinned, but I struggled to try and break free.

"You don't like me pinning you, huh?" He pressed his forehead against mine and we locked eyes.

"It's not that… I want to touch your body." I bit my lip.

"Well, in that case…" He unpinned me, and I didn't hesitate to feel his body with my fingertips.

We started to make out again, and I lightly trailed my hands around his abs and his hips. Not too long, his body is pressed against me; he began to trail kisses down my jawline to my neck. He sucked and bit my neck making me gasp out loud.

My moans echoed throughout the bathroom. Van smirked against my neck as he kept nibbling it. I tilted my head to the side, so he can have better access.

After he was done sucking on my neck, he lifted my body up, making me yelp. "Wrap your legs around me," he ordered.

I did as he says and wrapped my legs around his hips. He hissed when my inner thigh rubbed against him; he is already rock solid.

"I need to be inside you," he whispered.

I nodded in approval and he slowly guided himself inside me with one of his hands. My legs are still wrapped around him as he began to slam into me.

I felt his piercing hitting at the right spot; he wasn't holding back. I hope I didn't release too early, but the pleasure is just that good.

He kept slamming in and out of me, but he started to grunt in pain.

"Van…" I scowled.

"It's fine, Cagalli." Vanitas rolled his eyes, not slowing down his pace.

Before I could protest about his wound, he began to kiss me roughly. I kissed him just as rough back as he kept going in and out of me.

We broke the kiss and I slowly got off of him. He then commanded me to turn around, having my hands against the wall. I felt the water getting cold, but I didn't mind. My body is burning inside me, so it didn't bother me.

Without delaying, Van pushed himself inside me. My body arched as he began to thrust violently.

"I'm close…" Van leaned in and playfully bit my ear.

"Me too." I moaned out.

I felt like I am going to faint as my release took over, and after a couple more thrusts Vanitas reached his limit too. He slowly got out of me and we both began to pant in exhaustion.

"That was… Wow." I breathed out.

"Yeah…" He agreed.

I washed the conditioner off my hair under the cold water. My body began to tremble as the water hit me.

"We should get out… It's really cold in here," he muttered.

"Agreed." I shivered.

We both got out of the shower and we wrapped clean towels around each other. I couldn't help myself but giggle. He began to get flustered as I kept laughing at him.

"What?!" He barked.

"I still can't believe you got that pierced." I laughed out loud.

"It really isn't a big deal." He snorted.

"Not a lot of guys get it, though." I countered.

"They are missing out, then," Vanitas smirked at me.

"Guess you're right …" I whispered.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Ugh, geez a lot of people texted me to see if I'm okay…" I sighed.

"Yeah, same here," Van said while he is cooking us breakfast.

"You sure you don't want me to cook? You are still in a lot of pain, you know!"

"Ha, you can't cook." Vanitas began to laugh.

"I'm decent!"

"Sure." He snorted.

"Whatever." I huffed and started to text people on my phone.

"So, who all texted you?" He asked.

"Selphie, Yuffie, Riku, Sora, Kai, Wakka, Tidus, Seifer, Axel, and Zack."

Vanitas chuckled. "Zack?! What did he text? How he was a coward for not doing anything?"

"He left early, Van." That's what he told me in the text, and I know he wouldn't lie to me.

"Sure, whatever."

"Who all texted you?" I asked curiously.

"Pretty much the same people," he answered.

"Including your girls."

"Yeah, Eva wanted to come over, but I said I wanted to be alone."

"You know she's just going to show up…"

After I said that, the doorbell rang. Vanitas and I locked eyes as we both hesitated to see who was at the door.

"I guess I'll get it," he muttered.

He left me alone in the kitchen, and my heart felt empty inside. I just wish that Vanitas and I could spend a whole day with each other without his girlfriend or his other girls here…

"Cagalli!" I heard Seifer's voice from the living room.

"Coming!" I felt relieved it was Seifer and not Eva.

I walked in the living room and Seifer is with Selphie and Yuffie. I bet they wanted to check Van's wound to see if it got infected or not.

"Vanitas, can you lie down on the couch, so we can check on your injury?" Selphie asked.

"It's fine. You guys are worrying too much," he sighed.

"Dude, just let them check!" Seifer folded his arms across his chest.

"Ugh, fine." He lied down on the couch and took off his shirt to reveal his wound to them.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Owe! What the hell?!" Vanitas hissed from the ointment Yuffie spread across his wound.

It took them an hour to examine to see if it was infected, and lucky for him, it is not, but he has to put ointment on for a couple of days to make sure it heals perfectly.

I was ordered by Selphie and Yuffie to make sure he puts it on because we all know he's not going to do it himself.

"Sorry!" Yuffie apologized as she put a little more ointment on his wound.

"Okay, I think it's fine, geez!" Van screamed in pain.

Killer came in the room whimpering; I began to pet him to soothe him from worrying about his owner. I felt bad for Killer I knew if he were at the party, he would've attacked Zexion for hurting Vanitas.

"Axel, Sora, Riku, and Kai are going to stop by after their classes if it's cool with you," Seifer said.

"Actually, I just want to be home alone with Cagalli," Van whispered.

"Awe, so cute!" Selphie clapped her hands together.

"Oh, okay. I'm sure they will understand." Seifer gently smiled.

"Can you make sure Eva knows I want to be alone? I already told her, but I know she'll try to stop by anyways." Van rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, I can do that for you," Seifer said.

Vanitas wants to be alone with just me? I wonder why? I mean, I'm very happy, but he usually never turns down his guy friends to hang out with him… What has gotten into him? I felt my heart beating slow and steady; A whole day with just _him_ …

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After we said our goodbyes to our friends, Vanitas continued to cook us breakfast as I waited in the dining room patiently. The smell of his pancakes is making my stomach growl violently. I wish he would hurry up!

Vanitas came into the room, carrying two plates of pancakes. He set a plate in front of me and my mouth began to water; they look delicious! He put a lot of syrup on them, and the butter is melting all over.

"Eat up." He sat across from me and began to dig in.

"Oh, Yuffie also gave me painkillers, so I'm making you take them too!" I said with my mouthful.

"I like painkillers."

"But, you can't take them with alcohol!" I scowled at him.

"Who said I was going to?" He asked innocently.

"I just know you too well, Vanitas."

"Yeah, yeah."

We finished our pancakes in silence. I wonder what we are going to do all day? I want him to just lie in bed while I take care of him, but I know Vanitas wouldn't agree to that. He will probably want to drink which scares me…

"Cagalli?"

"Hm?"

"We should go out tonight."

My eyes widened. Since when does Vanitas want to go out? Well, maybe he wants us to go to a dive bar or something…

"Okay, what did you have in mind?" I raised a brow.

"I don't know… Maybe go to a fancy restaurant and a late movie…" His voice trailed.

I began to laugh hysterically. "No, seriously what do you want to do?" I couldn't stop myself from laughing…

"I'm serious. Let's go get dinner then go to the movies." Vanitas tilted his head. "Why is that funny?"

I blinked a couple of times. Is he serious? Since when does he want to go to a fancy restaurant? His definition of a "date" is to go bar hopping and get belligerently drunk until he can't remember anything…

"Wait, so you really want to do this? Wow, you getting shot changed you!" I gasped.

Vanitas huffed. "Do you want to go with me, or what!?"

"Yeah, I'm in…"

"Good," he smirked at me. "Wear something sexy…" He got up from his seat and collected our dirty plates to put in the sink.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Are you almost ready?" Vanitas asked outside my bedroom door. I can tell he is annoyed by the tone of his voice.

"Yeah. Chill!" I checked myself out in the mirror. My dress is black and very, very short! The back of it is also low. I kind of felt self-conscious in it because my ass is hanging out.

"CAGALLI!" He banged on my door.

"Okay, okay!" I put my hair up in a high ponytail then hurried and opened the door.

Vanitas just stood there with his eyes widened.

"You don't like it, huh?" I pouted.

"No, you look… Beautiful," he whispered.

I felt my body growing warm. "Really?"

"Yeah…"

"You look nice too…" I complimented.

Van's cheeks turned pink. "Ugh, thanks."

He really did look cute when he dresses up. His suit and dress shirt are pitch black while he wore a light gray tie to set off the black.

"Should we get going?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm driving the car…"

"You sure? I can drive plus I want you to take a painkiller before we leave!"

"No, Cagalli. I'm fine… Let's just go." He took my hand and dragged me down the stairs.

 _Tonight is going to be an interesting night._

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"What are you drinking?!" I yelled at him.

"I'm drinking out of a water bottle, so I'm guessing… Water?" He chuckled as he floored the gas.

"It doesn't smell like water."

"It's vodka… Want some?" He handed me the water bottle.

"You're drinking and driving!" I screeched.

"Come on, Cagalli. Tonight is a special night… Live a little!" He began to swerve the car, making me fall out of my seat.

"Vanitas!"

He began to laugh out loud. "Just drink!"

I started to take little sips, but it made me gag. Only Vanitas can drink vodka straight out of a water bottle!

"That's all you are going to drink?" He mocked.

I sighed and started to chug it until there was nothing left. I felt a little lightheaded.

"How do you feel?" He asked seductively.

"I think… I'm drunk. I don't know… I feel… Light." I leaned back against the car seat and closed my eyes. "Are we almost there?"

"Yeah, a couple more minutes."

I began to pay attention to the road, but I couldn't see straight... Everything is blurry and my mind is spinning like crazy.

Man, I shouldn't have drunk that alcohol. He always gets me to do crazy things…

"We're here," he said as he parked his car.

"Mhm..." I slowly opened the door to get out, but I almost fell! Vanitas hurried and got out, running towards my side to help me out of his car.

"Lightweight." He chuckled.

"Shut up…"

Vanitas wrapped his arms around me, so I didn't fall on the ground. I smelled tobacco off his suit and I couldn't help myself from nuzzling against him.

"Come on, we need to eat…" Vanitas whispered in my neck.

"But, I want to hold you…" Wow, I'm really drunk, aren't I?

"Let's go in. Can you act sober until we get to our table?"

"I think so…" I honestly don't think I could do it…

"Here." He offered me his arm.

I gladly wrapped my arm around his and we started to walk to this fancy restaurant that Vanitas made reservations for us.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Wow, this place is fancy!" I shouted a little too loudly than planned.

The restaurant is very big and there are a lot of gold pillars throughout the place. There are also beautiful flowers and candles at each table.

Vanitas took a huge sip of his white wine. "Yeah, it's not bad."

I chugged my glass of wine and Vanitas just chuckled at me.

"What?" I questioned.

"You should slow down. You are already drunk."

"So are you." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Ah, I'm a little buzzed."

Our snobby waiter came over to our table with our side salads. "Here you are. Your entrees will be out shortly," he said coldly.

"Thanks… Can we have more wine?" I slurred my words.

The waiter rolled his eyes. "I suppose." He then left us, making me feel guilty for my drunken actions.

"What's up his ass?" Van snorted.

"Who? I'm more concerned about that guy over here." I pointed at a man with a curled mustache.

Vanitas looked at the man I was pointing at and started to laugh hysterically. "Oh my God! Why does he have it curled?! I mean he looks like a cartoon villain!"

"I wonder if he curls it with his fingers when he's up to no good…" I ponder.

Vanitas and I both kept laughing and pointing at the man. Everyone around us gave us dirty looks for our loud outbursts, but Van and I are having so much fun!

"I think you should leave." Our waiter came up to us and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Awe why?" I whined.

"Cagalli, let's just go. This place is lame anyways." Vanitas got up from his seat and lifted me up so I am on my feet.

"Yeah, the people are no fun!" I giggled.

I have never been kicked out of a place before, but I don't feel bad about it! Maybe the reason why I don't feel bad is because I'm drunk, or maybe it's because I don't have a care in the world as long as Vanitas is with me.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I went to the late movie like we planned. Of course, we are going to see a horror movie… That's all we watch after all. Anyways, we sat way in the back so we are away from the other people.

I think Van is worried about me getting us kicked out of here, but I am starting to sober up… A little… Bit.

Vanitas wrapped his arm around me as his eyes are glued to the big screen. "You comfortable?"

"Yeah…" I rested my head on his shoulders. "Sorry for getting us kicked out of that restaurant."

"Oh, it's not your fault. I had fun."

I looked up at him. "Really?"

"Yeah…"

We both turned our attention to the movie, and not too long, Vanitas started to rub my thigh with his hand. I didn't protest because it felt so damn good, and all he is doing his rubbing my thigh, that's all…

I watched him as he kept rubbing it, but then he started to trail his hand closer to my…

"Van!" I loudly whispered.

"Relax…" He seductively grinned. He then began to finger around my underwear.

"What are you doing?" I gritted my teeth.

"Trust me." He moved my underwear over and began to circle my entrance with his pointer finger. He then slowly stuck it in, making me gasp.

"I'm sure you don't want people to know what we are doing…" Vanitas whispered in my ear.

I bit my lip as he began to pump his finger in and out of me. I naturally spread my legs for him to have better access. He inserted another finger and pumped them in and out of me.

I went to moan, but he leaned in and kissed me hard. I kissed him back as he finally added a third finger. He picked up the pace and I felt my limit approaching. He wasn't letting up, though. He kept going in and out until…

"Gah!" I moaned out loud. The people who are a couple of rows in front yelled at me to "be quiet".

Vanitas took his fingers out of me and licked them. I glanced at his pants and saw something sticking out. Without thinking, I grabbed it and he buckled his hips.

"Don't tease me," he muttered.

I wanted him to feel as good as he made me feel, so I unzipped his dress pants and pulled his length out of his boxer briefs. I began to feel him with my fingertips and I teased his head.

I love feeling his cold piercing with my hand, so I gave that more attention than the rest of his length. I looked up at Vanitas and he is clenching his teeth. Smirking, I continued to pump him up and down with my right hand.

After awhile, I picked up the pace and he kept thrusting his hips in sync with my hand. He growled in a low voice and released all over.

Like, Vanitas, I licked my hand until there is nothing left. He tasted, so good.

"You didn't have to do that, you know." Vanitas pulled me in, so my head is resting on his chest.

"But, I wanted too."

"You're crazy, Cagalli."

"I know that," I said innocently.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The movie is finally over and my stomach is killing me. I am starving! I didn't want to tell, Vanitas since I got us kicked out of that restaurant, so I guess I got to wait until I get home.

"That movie wasn't that scary," Vanitas said as he started the car.

"Yeah, I mean, it was okay." I wrapped my arms around my stomach, praying it wouldn't growl.

"What do you want to do now?" He asked.

My stomach answered for me as it did an obnoxious growl. "Sorry…" That was embarrassing.

"I'm hungry too. Where do you want to go?" He grinned.

"What's open this late at night?" I questioned.

"Taco Bell," he suggested as he pointed at their entrance.

"Yeah, that's good!" I'm in the mood for a chicken quesadilla anyways.

"Alright." He pulled into their parking lot and we walked hand in hand for our late night snack.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I sat on the roof of his car and ate our meals. It was very nice of him letting me wear his jacket since it is very cold outside. We both began to reminisce about our crazy night we shared together, and how we should do it again real soon.

There is never a dull moment with Vanitas. He seriously makes my life very interesting, I honestly don't know what I would do without him.

I rested my head on his shoulder as he looked up at the night sky. I wish this night could last forever.


	10. Chapter 10 - Just Don't Pretend

Chapter 10

Just Don't Pretend You're Just A Friend

 *** We don't need to go nowhere tonight. It's you and I, we'll be alright. – Cashmerecat (Feat. Ariana Grande) –** ** _Adore_**

I opened my eyes, and the first thing that caught my attention is a pounding headache, the second thing is that I am not in my room.

Wait, what room is this?! I haven't been in here before! I immediately sat up from the bed and scanned the room. The whole room is light gray; the walls, the carpet, even the bed I'm sleeping in now.

I turned my head to the side to see Vanitas sleeping peacefully. Am I in his room?! But, he NEVER lets any girl in his room! This is bad! I must've snuck in! I have to get out of here!

I slowly got out of the bed and tiptoed towards the door. I then turned the doorknob as quietly as I could, but, of course, that failed! The doorknob made a HUGE clicking noise!

"Cagalli?" I heard Van's sleeping voice.

I felt my pulse speeding up. "Yeah?"

"Where are you going? Come back to bed." He yawned.

"You don't care that I'm in your room?"

"What are you talking about?" He groaned in annoyance. "I invited you in here last night… Wow, you don't remember anything."

I walked back to where he is laying and crawled back in bed. "Did we have sex last night?"

Vanitas snorted. "No, you passed out as soon as you laid here."

"Oh." I felt my face getting flustered.

"Ha, it's okay. I'm glad we slept in my room… My bed is a lot more comfortable than yours."

He is right, but I didn't want to admit it. "It's not THAT great…"

Vanitas pulled me closer to his body and wrapped his arms around me from behind. "Go back to sleep," he whispered in my ear and lightly bit it.

I felt my body getting hot… He knew all my weak spots, but sadly, I didn't know and of his. I closed my eyes and not too long I fell asleep from his warmth.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

A couple hours later and I woke up, but Vanitas wasn't by my side. I immediately got out of his bed to go look for him. I hope he didn't go anywhere! It's Friday, I didn't want to be alone all day.

As I looked around the house, Kairi came out of nowhere!

"AH!" I shouted out.

"It's me! Relax!" She cheered.

"YOU SCARED ME!" I scowled at her. "How did you get in here?"

"The front door… Was open." She stuttered. I started to grow suspicious…

"Oh?"

"Yeah." She giggled.

"You're acting EXTRA cheerful today…" I raised a brow at her.

"Well, I'm really in a good mood…"

"Uh-huh…"

"Um, we should do something today! It's Friday, you know!"

"Yeah, I don't want to sit in the house all day. What do you want to do?" I asked.

"Day drinking!" She beamed.

Well, my head doesn't hurt anymore, so I guess that would be a good idea… "Sure, let me shower and change!"

Kairi's eyes widened and she immediately shook her head. "No, no just change!"

"Kai, I need a shower…"

"No, no! Just change! You take forever to get ready!"

"Um, what's the rush?"

She scratched her head like she is thinking of an idea. "I just want to drink, that's all!"

"Okay, fine. Just hold on then." I rolled my eyes and went to my room to change.

I just threw on tight fitting sweats with a matching zip-up hoodie. I then combed my hair and applied only mascara (since Kairi keeps rushing me). As soon as I walked out of my bedroom, Kairi grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the house.

It's like she doesn't want me to be in this house for another second. She sure is acting strange…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Kairi and I are at this Mexican restaurant, drinking margaritas and taking shots of cheap tequila. I always like to just drink with Kairi sometimes. She is always a fun drunk, so it's never boring when I hang out with her.

Before I took another shot, my cell phone started to ring. I checked to see who it was, and it was Zack. It just dawned on me that we promised each other to go on a date, but since Vanitas and I got close, I don't think I want to go now… Plus he was talking to his ex at that party…

"Who is that?" Kairi curiously asked.

"Zack…"

"Oh…"

"He's going to ask me about our date… I'll just say I'm sick!"

"Good idea." Kai nodded.

I finally picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, Cagalli! What's up?" Zack sounded so cheerful and it is making my stomach hurt. I started to feel guilty.

"I'm in bed." I faked a cough. "I'm kind of sick…"

"Oh, no! You want me to come over and bring soup? I was going to ask you on a date tonight, but if you're sick…"

"Kairi is taking care of me, and it wouldn't be right if I got you sick, so let's postpone it, okay?"

"Um, alright…" Zack's voice trailed.

"I'm sorry." I bit my lip.

"No, it's cool. I'll catch you later then… Feel better."

"Bye!" I hung up the phone and sighed.

"Did he fall for it?" Kairi asked.

"Yeah, but I feel bad…"

"Well, you don't like him, so I get why you canceled…" Kairi shrugged. "Oh, you got to tell me about you and Vanitas!"

"Um, we… Kind… Of… Had… Sex…" I muttered.

"OH MY GOD!" Kairi yelled out, causing everyone in the small restaurant to stop and stare at us.

"Kai!" I glared at her.

"Sorry!" She apologized to everyone. "So, tell me details!" She whispered to me.

I took a deep breath and told her all that happened after Demyx's party till when I woke up in his room this morning. She didn't say a word until I finished my whole story.

She is so happy for me, but I couldn't help myself but worry… If he liked me so much wouldn't he of dumped Eva and those other two girls? Oh, and did he ever stop selling?! I still don't FULLY trust Vanitas yet…

"I should text him…" I whispered as I began to type on my phone. I am already feeling a little buzzed.

"THAT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA!" Kairi slapped my hand, which caused my phone to fall on the floor.

"Why not?" I snapped. "You are acting REALLY strange today!"

"No, I'm not!" She argued.

I picked up my phone and texted Vanitas anyways…

 **ME: What's up?**

I waited, and waited, and waited. He hasn't texted me back, but it's only been a couple of minutes…

"He's probably busy with something…" Kai shrugged.

"With what? He never does anything on the weekends unless it's drinking…"

"I wouldn't sweat it. He's probably with Axel and Seifer…"

"Yeah…" I took a big gulp of my margarita.

Before Kairi and I started a new conversation, we heard Demyx's voice from the entrance of the restaurant. Kairi waved at Dem and he casually walked up to us at the bar area.

"What's up, ladies?!" He greeted us.

"Day drinking," Kairi answered.

"I see! How are you, Ms. Cagalli?" He ruffled my hair.

"I'm fine." I gently smiled at him.

He took a seat next to me and ordered us shots from the bartender. The three of us immediately downed the shots, and he ordered us another round! I didn't complain, though. I had no classes, my roommate is MIA, and I'm with my best friend Kairi, so I'm going to enjoy my Friday with these two!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The three of us couldn't stop giggling. I felt the whole room spinning, and my body is numb. Yes, we are all drunk, but I love it!

We are also the loudest one's in the restaurant, but the waiters and bartenders didn't care! They loved us, actually.

Kairi looked at her phone and sighed.

"I have to call someone, be right back!" She slurred her words.

"Why can't you just call here?" I asked.

"It's personal…" She snapped.

"Oh, um sorry!" I felt bad I asked now…

She got up and went to the ladies room, leaving me alone with Demyx. He began to talk to me about all the crazy things that happened at his party; for only knowing Demyx for a short period of time, I was starting to warm up to him. I really liked him!

Before Demyx and I started a new conversation, Kairi came back, but her face is pale.

"What's wrong?" I shouldn't ask since she snapped at me when I tried to snoop, but she looks like she did something really bad.

"I might be in trouble," she muttered.

Before I could ask any more questions, the front door slammed open and there stood Vanitas with his arms crossed.

"Van?" I called out, but then I fell on the ground.

"Ha, she fell!" Demyx announced.

Vanitas approached us and scowled at Kairi "Why did you take her here? These waiters are perverts!"

"I didn't know!" She hissed.

"Wait, how did you know we were here, and why are you yelling at Kairi?" I slowly got up off the ground, but I lost my balance. Vanitas immediately grabbed me.

"Let's go home. Sora is outside waiting for you, Kai!" Vanitas sighed.

"Do you need a ride home, Demyx?" Kai asked.

"No, I walked here, so I'll be fine." He insisted.

"No, we'll take you home, let's go!" Kairi pulled Demyx by the arm.

I said my goodbyes to everyone once we were outside, and I lazily climbed in Van's car. Vanitas got in the passenger's side and rolled his eyes.

"Why didn't you answer my texts?" I whined.

"I was busy…" His voice trailed.

We rode the rest of the way home in silence. I wonder why Kairi was acting so strange, and I also wonder if she was talking to Vanitas on the phone when she went to the restroom?

I rubbed my temples because I felt very lightheaded. Vanitas put his hand on my head and began to massage my scalp.

 _This feels so good._

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I stumbled in the house, but my eyes widened when I saw the dining room table all decorated! There is a nice tablecloth with rose petals all over! There are also two wine glasses, a bottle of champagne in the middle of the table, and two plates with silverware next to them.

"What's this?" I asked.

"I thought to do something a little special for a crazy girl…" He smiled seductively.

"For me?" I felt tears well up. Vanitas has never does anything this romantic before…

"I just wanted to celebrate on me officially quitting…" Vanitas smirked.

"Quitting?"

"Me selling, silly!"

"You stopped selling!" My heart did a front flip inside me. I jumped on him and gave him a big hug. "Thank you…"

"It's nothing…" Vanitas lightly chuckled. "Now, sit down. I cooked us some stuff…"

"You cooked? Oh, well this is a special occasion!" I sat down at the table with my shoulders back. I am truly proud of Vanitas!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Wow, you should be a chief, Vanitas!" I praised with a mouthful of steak.

Vanitas cooked us six-ounce Sirloin steak, dirty mashed potatoes (My favorite), and cooked broccoli.

I knew Vanitas can cook, but he really outdid himself this time. Vanitas finally told me why Kairi was acting so strange, and it was because she was ordered by him to get me out of the house so Seifer, Axel, Sora, and himself can prepare for tonight.

I couldn't ask for a better meal, to be honest.

"Are you just saying that because you're drunk?" He started to chug his glass of champagne.

It's true that everything I eat is good when I'm drunk, but this meal here is to die for, sober or not.

"No, this is really good! You outdid yourself! Oh, maybe that should be your next job!"

"Being a chief?" Vanitas pondered the thought then shook his head. "Eh, I would be a butcher over that, any day…"

"A butcher… Yeah, I can see you being that!" I agreed. I can totally see Vanitas with blood all over himself from cutting up a cow!

"Really?" Vanitas questioned.

"Of course! You should defiantly be a butcher!" I giggled.

"Alright, if you think I can do it… Then I'll try."

After talking about Vanitas' future job, we finished our meals and Vanitas left me for a good minute to go into the kitchen.

I wanted to see what he is up to, but he told me to stay here. I wish I was sobering up, but it was my fault for drinking too many drinks at the Mexican bar, plus I drank about five glasses of champagne.

Vanitas came back in the room with two bowls full of vanilla ice cream, and they both had one huge brownie sticking out. He set a bowl down in front of me, and my mouth began to salivate. The ice cream is melting fast from the warm brownie.

"This looks really good, Vanitas!" I kept staring at his homemade dessert.

"Try it."

I took a big spoon full and it tasted really sweet from the brownie, but it wasn't rich because the vanilla cooled the flavor.

I am in heaven.

"Yum!" I took another spoon full.

"Glad you like it."

We ate our desserts in silence. I am enjoying every bite I took from this dessert. I know for a fact that I will lick this bowl clean.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I are cuddling in his room. I couldn't help myself but hold him tight; I am honestly surprised he didn't protest.

"You're warm," I whispered.

"Yeah…" He moved a strand of my hair away from my face.

"I can stay like this all night."

Vanitas lightly chuckled. "Actually we are going to be doing something else." His tone sounded seductive…

I gulp. "What do you mean?"

"I want to try something I never tried with anyone before…" He stared deep into my eyes.

"What?" I asked.

"I want to tie you up and have my way with you…" He stated.

I haven't been tied up before, but it sounds like fun. I wouldn't mind it actually. "Okay."

"Wait, really?" Van's eyes widened.

"Yeah, why not?"

Vanitas immediately let go of me to get out of bed. He then went to his dresser to fish out something…

I went to look over his shoulder, but he yelled at me to stay in his bed. I rolled my eyes as he pulled out shiny handcuffs.

"You defiantly have done this before!" I huffed.

"I just bought these this morning…" He laughed while he walked up to me. He forcefully unzipped my hoodie and threw it to the side. He then unhooked my bra and tossed it next to my hoodie.

He didn't hesitate to handcuff one of my wrists, forcing my body to move closer to the bed frame. He then looped the other side of the handcuffs and handcuffed my other wrist.

My arms are above my head, and I couldn't move out of them… The handcuffs are on too tight. I am connected to the bedpost, but I couldn't help myself but grow hot from this new experience.

"Don't move." He grinned at me wickedly.

"Um, I kind of can't…"

He then went back to his dresser to fish something else out. I began to ask him what else he is looking for, but, of course, he ignored me.

What else would he need? He already had me handcuffed… He pulled out a black blindfold.

 _Oh, no! I don't want to be blindfolded!_

"No, no. No!" I whined.

"Why?" He hovered over me.

"I won't be able to see…"

Vanitas sighed. "That's kind of the point…"

"But, it's scary…"

"I promise you I won't do anything that will make you uncomfortable," he said sweetly. "Please trust me…"

I took a deep breath and nodded. "Fine."

Vanitas hurried and blindfolded me, and obviously, I couldn't see anything! I heard his footsteps leaving the room, and I began to freak. I called his name over and over again, but he finally answered me.

"I left for a second, chill," he whispered.

I felt the pressure of the bed, guessing Vanitas is now on the bed with me. I then felt his hands roughly pulling down my pants along with my underwear. I am now completely naked in front of him.

There is a long pause until I felt something unbearably cold on my stomach. Is that an ice cube? I felt cold water dripping down there… I couldn't help but tremble from this insane touch.

"Does it feel good?" I heard him ask.

"It feels strange." My teeth began to chatter from my body growing numb and cold.

I felt the ice cube against my right breast for a while then he switched towards the left. He is circling the ice cube against them until they grew very numb. He then moved the ice cube around my neck, down my stomach… Until…

"Oh!" I moaned.

He had it down there! It felt weird… I couldn't tell if I am turned on or just cold. He moved it up and down on my clit, and I bucked my hips up.

 _Yeah, it felt good…_

I heard the bed shift more, and I moaned out when I felt his cold tongue ring down there. He began to lick up and down… He then stuck his tongue inside me and began to pump in and out of me. I moved my hips up and down in sync with his tongue.

I felt him smirk against me as he continued to lick.

"Vanitas…" I whispered.

He stopped and I felt him crawling closer to my face. There is a long pause, so I couldn't tell where he is.

"Open," he commanded.

I did as he says and he lightly pushed his length inside my mouth. I didn't hesitate to lick it. I moved my tongue around the length and I heard him moan in satisfaction.

My tongue swirled around his metal piercing and I guess it is one of his weak spots because he bucked his hips for me, urging me to keep going. I kept circling my tongue around it for a little while then started to bob my head back and forth.

"God, this feels good, Cagalli…"

I kept going and going until he violently pulled out of my mouth. I heard the bed rocking. I couldn't wait any minute; he needs to be inside me…

I then felt his length circling around me, and he slowly pushed himself in me. I bucked my hips to meet with every thrust. We both panted as he kept going.

He is going way too fast, but I loved it. The whole bed is squeaking from him moving back and forth. I felt my release approaching as he slammed into me.

After a couple more thrusts, I threw my head back and I successfully reached my limit.

"Already?" He asked teasingly.

I felt my face turning red as I heard the bed shift more.

"Raise your hips up!" He ordered.

I did as he says, and I felt his body under me.

 _How did he get under me so fast?!_

"Spread your legs," Vanitas whispered.

I did as he says and felt him inside me yet again. He began to pump in and out of me. I tried not to cry out, but I couldn't help it.

He started to lick up and down my neck and I felt like I am losing control. He is going super fast, I didn't know how much more I could take.

He playfully bit my ear, making me yell out in pure lust.

"I'm close," he grunted in my ear.

He increased his pace, and I felt my wrists growing numb from them rubbing against the handcuffs. This is an awkward position for me, but it felt so right…

After a couple more thrusts, we released together. We both tried to catch our breaths, and I felt Vanitas getting off the bed. He then took the blindfold off of me, and I blinked a couple of times because the light is blinding me.

"So, did you like it?" He asked.

"Yeah, it was fun, but Vanitas?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm tying you up next time!"


	11. Chapter 11 - There's Beauty In Goodbye

**AUTHOR NOTE: IMPORTANT: I want to let you know that after this chapter, the story will be in VANITAS' POINT OF VIEW until the end of the story! I will remind you in the next chapter, so you don't get confused!**

 **ANOTHER SIDE NOTE: THIS IS A VERY SHORT CHAPTER, PLEASE DON'T HATE ME, BUT I'LL UPDATE THE NEXT CHAPTER SOON! :D**

Chapter 11

Maybe There's Beauty In Goodbye

 *** You push me away, another black day. Let's count up the reasons to cry. Look what you've missed, living like this, nobody wins. – The Veronicas –** ** _Nobody Wins_**

Vanitas and I are at a pub, day drinking since we had nothing better to do on a Saturday afternoon. Vanitas has been avoiding his girls recently, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. Maybe, it is just a phase he was going through… We have been having a lot of fun, so I hope our fun doesn't end soon…

"Hey, are you drunk yet?" Vanitas asked.

I took a huge sip of my pineapple and vodka. "Nope. This is only my third one."

"Two shots of Absolute!" Vanitas shouted at the bartender.

"Got it!" The bartender poured vodka in two little shot glasses and handed them to us.

"Really, Vanitas? We are going to get THAT drunk again?" I rolled my eyes and took my shot.

"Not We, YOU!" He downed his shot and laughed.

"I wish I had a high tolerance for alcohol like you." I praised.

"Ha. Nah, it's cute when you get drunk too fast." He teased.

I rolled my eyes and grunted. "Whatever."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you!" Vanitas playfully flicked my nose.

I rubbed my nose and glared at him. "What?"

"I got a job at Meat Town's Diner!" He grinned. "I'm going to be a butcher!"

"Really?! That's great! How did you get the job?"

"Sora knows the owner, so I asked him if the owner needed a butcher and the next thing I know; I'm hired!"

I am truly amazed how everything is falling in place for Vanitas, and I couldn't be more than happy for him. I don't want to curse it, but I think he is slowly becoming a nice and caring person. I love the new Vanitas.

"When's your first day?" I asked.

"Tomorrow."

"Wow, I might stop by to check up on you." I winked.

"I would like that…" He patted my head.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I decided to head home and just watch scary movies all day. I still want him to relax because of his wound, but it is slowly getting better! I feel bad it's going to be a huge scar, though. Vanitas told me he is happy the scar is going to be big because it will show what a true "badass" he is. Only he would be happy of his "battle wound".

As Van and I are walking on the sidewalk, talking bout his new job, Van stopped in his tracks.

"Van?" I questioned, but my eyes widened when I followed his gaze.

There is Zexion standing right before us! I pulled Vanitas' arm, trying to get him to ignore Zexion, but he pulled his arm away from my grasp.

This is no good; I just wanted to go to Van's car and go home! If Van gets in a fight with him then he'll be back to the old Vanitas…

"Please ignore him. He's not worth it!" I gritted my teeth, but it is no use, there is darkness in Vanitas' eyes.

He's going to fight him, and there's nothing I can do or say to stop him.

"I wish I had my gun, so I can end your pathetic life." Zexion hummed.

"I'll destroy you with my bare fists!" Vanitas screamed out as he charged at Zexion.

I smacked my forehead with my hand while Vanitas started to throw punches at Zexion. Zexion dodged them, but they were close calls every time.

The people around us stopped and stared, and I felt embarrassed. They are whispering amongst themselves making my knees feel very weak. Why couldn't he have chosen to walk away?!

Vanitas finally threw a punch at Zexion's face and Zexion fell head first on the concrete. Everyone gasped and they all examined Zexion's body, I, on the other hand, grabbed Vanitas and pulled him away from everyone. If we don't leave, the police will surely arrest him.

"Come on, Vanitas! I don't want to bail you out of jail!" I kept pulling his arm.

Vanitas nodded and we both ran to his car before anyone had time to call the police. I'm sure Zexion won't mess with Vanitas anymore…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Vanitas and I are in his room watching a horror movie, but I didn't know what is going on because Vanitas kept talking the whole time!

"He's nothing without a gun! Now I get why he carries it; he can't even defend himself with his fists!" Vanitas mocked Zexion.

"I just wished you would have walked away," I muttered.

"Ah, come on, Cagalli! If I just walked away then I would regret it! I mean, he shot me; he should've seen it coming."

I didn't feel like talking about it anymore, so I just rolled my eyes and watched the movie. Vanitas tried to put his arm around me, but I kept flinching away.

I want him to be back to the "sweet" Vanitas, not the "rude" Vanitas…

"Ha, Eva would've praised me if I punched him in front of her," he said coldly.

That comment set me off. I felt my body burning with rage. "THEN CALL HER AND HANG OUT WITH HER SINCE YOU LOVE HER SO MUCH!" I shouted.

Vanitas' eyes widened. "Geez. I was just kidding…"

"Well, I'm not. It's funny how we've been hanging out a lot and you're still dating her. Have I turned into one of your other girls?"

Vanitas went to touch my face, but I slapped his hand away.

"Don't touch me!" I threatened.

Vanitas blinked a couple of time. "Are you on your period or something?"

I began to laugh hysterically. "It's all a BIG joke, isn't it?! How long are you going to keep leading me on?!"

"I'm not leading you on… I care about you, Cagalli. Just chill." He tried to kiss me, but no surprise; I flinched away.

"If you cared about me then you would be with me instead of those other women!"

Vanitas grew quiet for a second, but then his phone started to ring. I glanced to see who is calling, and it is Eva! PERFECT TIMING! I threw my hands in the air and ran out of the room.

"CAGALLI, WAIT!" Vanitas ran after me, ignoring his phone.

I didn't wait, though. I wanted to run out of the house to get fresh air, and maybe call Kairi to stay at her house for a couple of days. I should have known that he would never change. He never cared about me; he never loved me…

Before I touched the front door knob, Vanitas pushed me against the door and pinned me down; our foreheads are touching.

"Don't leave… I'm sorry," he whispered.

"How long…"

"How long what?" Vanitas asked sternly.

"How long are we going to keep playing these games?" I tried to break free of his grasp, but he isn't budging.

"Cagalli-"

I interrupted him. "No, it's always going to be like this. We are just friends with benefits… Nothing more…"

"That's not true. I just want to take it slow…"

"WE'VE HAVE BEEN TAKING IT SLOW FOR YEARS AND YEARS!" I shouted in his face.

He slowly unpinned me and stared deep into my eyes. "Cagalli… I…"

My eyes widened. I'm waiting for him to say it. Was he seriously going to tell me that he loves me? Vanitas tried to get the words out, but it isn't working.

My eyes began to water… He can't even say it because he doesn't truly love me…

I walked passed him to go in my room to be left alone. He didn't even bother to follow me because we both know deep down that he doesn't love me like I love him.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I heard the front door close, and I guess he left to be with his girlfriend or whoever. I talked to Kairi and Sora about our little fight, and Kairi told me to come over for a couple of days to cool off while Sora told me that I should just move out and get away from him.

I had a gut feeling to take Sora's advice. Why should I torture myself by seeing him every day when I know he doesn't love me?

Am I supposed to act like this fight never happened? I wasted so many years on him, and it wasn't even getting me anywhere. The only problem is where am I going to go?

As I ponder the thought, my phone began to ring. I looked to see who it is and I didn't hesitate to answer.

"Hey, Zack, what's up?"


	12. Chapter 12 - I'm In Over My Head

Chapter 12

Everyone Knows I'm In Over My Head

 *** "Suddenly I become a part of your past; I'm becoming the part that don't last. I'm losing you and it's effortless. Without a sound, we lose sight of the ground in the throw around. Never thought that you wanted to bring me down. I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves." - Cover A Day To Remember (Originally The Fray) –** ** _Over My Head (Cable Car)_**

 **VANITAS P.O.V.**

I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. Another dream I had of her, and it is eating me alive because I knew we would never be the way we used to be.

It's been three months since I last saw her. She officially moved out of the apartment and out of my life. I thought she would be staying with Kairi, but I found out from Axel that she is living with that douchebag, Zack.

"Vanitas…" Eva moaned out my name. "Go back to sleep."

I grunted in response. I thought sleeping around would get my mind off of Cagalli, but it made things worse. I dream about her every night and I think about her during the day. I even started to drink a lot more than I usually do because of her.

"Do you want me to do something to make you go back to sleep," Eva tried to sound seductive, but she failed.

"Nah, I'm leaving…" I got out of her bed to find my clothes that are scattered all over the damn place.

Eva sat up from the bed and wrapped blankets around herself. "You've been acting strange ever since that brat left." She hissed.

I ignored her and hurried and threw my clothes on. I wanted out of here and fast… She's been getting on my nerves lately, but it was like that with all the girls I have been sleeping around with.

It's annoying they saw right through me. They all knew I am still hung up on my ex-roommate… I wish I wasn't that predictable…

"Do you love her?" Eva asked.

I sat on the foot of her bed to tie my shoes. I don't have to answer to her especially when it's obvious. She asks me that question every damn time. She already knew the answer, so why does she keep asking?

Eva wrapped her arms around me from behind and whispered in my ear. "She's not good in bed like I am, right?"

I shrugged her off. I'm sick of her being clingy. She scowled at me, and I knew what was coming… She's going to freak out and start a fight that I'm not interested in participating.

"Why the hell do you love her? She isn't anything special! I'm better than her!" She yelled out.

I snorted. "You don't even compare to her. We're through." I got off of her bed and walked out of her bedroom. She kept shouting my name over and over, but I'm done with her and those other two girls. If they don't get my mind off of Cagalli then they're useless to me.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am back at the apartment and went straight to her empty room. This is what I do every day, I sit on the floor and drink brandy until I can't think straight. I opened the new bottle and began to chug. I couldn't wait to feel numb and emotionless after I am through with this bottle.

My phone vibrated as I continued to down my drink; annoyed I answered the phone.

"What?" I snapped.

"It's Axel, chill."

"What's up?" I sighed.

"Are you going to your cousin's tonight?"

"Yeah, why does Cagalli want to know if I'll be there or not?" I snorted.

Every time I hang out with our friends, Cagalli bails because she knows I'll be around. She's been avoiding me and it was irritating the hell out of me.

"Um…" Axel muttered.

"Whatever if she wants to go then she can go. I'll just stay home." I rolled my eyes.

"No, I want you to come!" Axel insisted.

"Whatever, I'll be there." I hung up the phone and began to drink out of the bottle yet again. I stared at all the holes in the wall I made after Cagalli left me.

My stupid landlord is going to take my security deposit, but I didn't give a rat's ass. Every punch I did against these walls were worth it… I wish I knew where her _lover_ lived, so I can punch him too… He doesn't deserve a girl like her…

My dog came in the room and rested his head on my leg. Killer hasn't been the same since she left, but neither have I.

I looked at my half empty bottle and began to chug the rest of it. Killer studied me as I finished every last drop. I felt myself finally feeling good, and I threw the bottle against the wall. I laughed to myself as I stared at the broken glass all over her floor.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Hey, wake up, Van!" I heard a voice…

I opened my eyes and saw Axel staring down at me. I groaned in response… No surprise, I have fallen asleep on her dirty ass floor…

"You need to stop this, man. I never saw you this depressed since she left," Axel said.

"I'm fine." I stood up from the floor, but I lost my balance and leaned against the wall. At least, I'm still drunk.

"You sure you want to go to Sora's?" Axel asked.

"Yeah…"

"Well, let's go then. I'm driving since you're drunk as usual…" Axel shook his head.

"I'll get over her soon..." Deep down I knew I was lying to him and myself. I'll never get over that stupid brat.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

We are at Sora's, but I am bored as soon as I walked through the door. I went to go into his kitchen to get myself alcohol since I'll need it to get through this lame party.

I poured glasses full of absolute for Axel and me, but when I handed it to him, he is staring at something… I followed his gaze and he is staring at Sora's brother, Roxas.

"Why are you staring at my cousin? Geez, are you gay now?" I joked.

"Ugh, no… Of course not." He stuttered. "But, Ugh. Why haven't I seen him before?"

His answer freaked me out, but I just shrugged it off. "He's visiting Sora for the weekend along with his best friend, Xion."

"Oh, I see…" Axel continued to stare at him.

Annoyed, I went to sit on the lounge chair while everyone else is talking to each other. No one is interesting at this party, so why did I even bother?

Was I hoping she would show up? I took big gulps of my drink, trying to forget about her.

"Hey, there…"

I glared at Xion for approaching me. "What's up?"

She blushed. "Um, nothing. I saw you here by yourself, so I wanted to say hi."

 _Pathetic_ , I thought to myself.

"I like to be alone…" I gulped the rest of my drink down. "Hey, can you pour me a glass full of absolute?" I asked her. Might as well use her for something…

Xion hesitated but grabbed my empty glass. "Um, sure,"

I smirked as I watched her leave.

"Hey, Van!" Seifer came up to me. The lightweight is already drunk…

"Hey," I casually said.

"Are you still hung up on Cagalli?" He teased.

"So what if I am?" I'm sick of these losers teasing me about her. It was getting old.

"I'm just messing." He scratched the back of his head.

I wanted to punch the shit out of him, but I controlled myself when Xion brought me back my savior.

"Thanks." I immediately chugged the drink.

I can tell the girl is judging me about my drinking, but when do I care what people thought about me?

Seifer and she both kept trying to talk to me, but I wasn't paying attention because everything they said was boring me. I just wanted to drink a couple more drinks and get the hell out of here.

"Hey, guys… He just wants to be left alone," Axel said to these two lames.

Xion and Seifer looked at each other and finally left me alone to drink the rest of my drink. Axel stared at me then rolled his eyes and walked to a corner of the room to stare at Roxas.

It is bugging me that he is creeping on Roxas like that. I can't see Axel being gay because he's been with different girls all of the time, but who knows. I am too drunk to even care.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I don't how many drinks I had, but who's counting anyways? I wanted to leave and just crash on my bed, but Axel is too busy flirting with Roxas.

This was a stupid idea to come here, a big waste of my time. I rested my head against the chair and closed my eyes until I heard a name I've been dying to hear for three months now...

"CAGALLI!" Kairi screamed out.

I sat up on the chair and saw her and the douchebag walk in together, but something rubbed me the wrong way. She was a bone. Has she been starving herself? Why hasn't anyone told me?! And why hasn't her precious boyfriend done anything to prevent this!?

I got out of the chair and grabbed Axel by the arm. I then roughly dragged him into the bathroom.

"What gives?!" He freaked.

"Why haven't you told me she's been starving herself?" I clenched my teeth. I felt my body burning… Couldn't tell if it's from the alcohol or being pissed about Cagalli becoming anorexic.

"She told us not to tell you. It's none of your business anyways! If it's anyone's it's Zack!" Axel pushed me. "You need to stop drinking. You've been a buzz kill lately!"

I ignored Axel and left because if I stayed in this bathroom any longer then I would've slit his throat. I can't believe I found out this way…

I went back into the living room and leaned my back against the wall while I watched Cagalli awkwardly standing there. The stupid girl isn't even making eye contact with me…

I continued to watch her and I saw Zack put his arm around her waist. It felt like I got shot all over again… I didn't want him to lay a finger on her! I would do anything to pull her away from him, but I knew I couldn't… She would hate me even more.

I needed a smoke, so I went outside without anyone noticing. I should just walk home since Axel wants to be a social butterfly around my boring cousin.

I smirked to myself as I lit up my cig, but my eyes completely widened when I saw Cagalli walking out, but she regretted it because she turned her back on me to go inside.

"I'm not going to do anything to you, chill," I inhaled then exhaled smoke from my cig.

She slowly turned around and blinked a couple of times. _I got her where I want her…_

"You can sit down, you know," I said teasingly.

She sat on the opposite side of me and crossed her arms over her chest. She then turned her gaze on the full moon.

"So, you aren't going to say anything, huh?" I tried to keep my cool, but I wanted to scream at her for abusing herself like that. How could she be so foolish?

"I have nothing to say to you," she said in a small voice.

I threw my unfinished cig on the ground and stomped on it. "You have a lot to say to me."

She looked at me with sorrow in her eyes. I think she is going to break down and cry, but instead, she just sat there like a rag doll.

I walked up to her, but she went to get up to leave. I hurried and grabbed both of her wrists and pinned her against the house.

"Why?" I whispered.

She looked at me with her beautiful green orbs. "What?"

"Why are you starving yourself?"

Tears are forming in her eyes. "It's none of your business! If I want to starve myself, then I'll do it!"

"It is my business when no one is doing anything about it!" I tightened my grip on her.

"Zack is helping me get through this!"

I just snorted. "He isn't making much progress, now, is he?"

"GET OFF ME!" She began to scream and she tried to get out of my grip, but as usual, she couldn't… _Weak…_

"If you answer this question, then I'll let go of you…"

She grunted but then nodded. "What?"

I stared at her before asking. I am afraid what the answer would be, to be honest, but I wanted to know. "If I kissed you right now, what would you do?"

Her eyes widened and she violently shook her head. "I'll kill you!"

I felt disappointed that she didn't want to kiss me, but yet, I wasn't taking no for an answer. I slowly leaned in and kissed her firmly, but what surprised me is that she kissed me back. I wasn't losing the opportunity so I slid my tongue into her mouth. She began to play with my tongue with her own. We both didn't want to pull away from this kiss, but we had to catch our breaths.

I was the first to pull back, and her eyes are widened in fear. I slowly unpinned her and she touched her lips with her fingertips.

"You…Jerk!" She slapped me across the face and ran back in the house.

I rubbed my cheek and grunted. Why did she slap me when she kissed me back!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I was over this "party" so I walked home since I had no ride back. I knew I should've driven, but Axel talked me out of it.

I am still pretty pissed no one has told me about Cagalli's problem. I thought at least, Kairi would have contacted me, but I guess she thinks Zack is helping her… He isn't doing shit!

I would never let her do something so reckless like that… Cagalli isn't the type of person to do that, so what made her? Was it because of her useless boyfriend, or was it because of me?

Stopping in my tracks, I felt my whole body shaking up. Is it my fault Cagalli is in danger?

I was the one who kept calling her over and over again, but she blocked me! I tried to see if she was at Kai's, but she got Kairi to lie to me and say she wasn't there! I was the only one who made an effort while she didn't do shit to talk to me!

Cagalli moved on with her life while I'm still stuck in the past.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I kept punching and punching new holes on her blank walls until my knuckles were bleeding. I haven't cried for a person before, but when she left me, I cried almost every damn day because of her. I should have told her I loved her that day, but I wasn't ready… I wanted to say it when the time was right. I do love her, and I always did, but I was afraid to love her. I never really loved a person before… Yeah, I had girlfriends, but they didn't compare on how much I cared for Cagalli.

If I dated Cagalli, it would be a new experience I wasn't comfortable in trying. I regret not telling her because now she's gone and I'm here drinking my life away in her empty room.

"Vanitas…" I heard Axel's voice.

I turned around and saw Axel and Seifer standing there with blank expressions on their stupid faces.

"What?" I glared at them. I wanted to be alone for the rest of the night.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about her…" Axel sighed. "I just didn't want you to blame yourself."

"It was wrong for you guys not to tell me. She can die from starving herself!" I argued. "And what pisses me off the most is that no one is doing anything about it!"

"Zack is trying, Van. He's been scheduling appointments for her to see a therapist, but she keeps skipping the sessions. It's like she doesn't want help," Seifer explained.

Ha, he's _trying?_ He's not trying hard enough… I would've shoved food in her mouth, but wait, if I was still with her, would she have starved herself? Would she still be healthy if she still lived here?

I looked down at my bruised knuckles and trembled. If she dies, then it will be my fault…

"Van?" Seifer patted my shoulder. "This is why we didn't want to tell you… You are feeling guilty…"

"I want to help her," I whispered.

"You can't. If you try then she'll just do something to hurt herself even worse. You are no good for her Van," Axel said sternly.

 _I'm no good for her…_

"You're not the only one who's suffering, Van. She's been a wreck since she moved out of here, and now she's like a zombie. She never talks, eats, or even goes out because of you," Seifer muttered.

I sat on the floor and leaned my back against the wall. "I should have told her I loved her…"

"Maybe you can still say it." Seifer sat next to me.

"Just not right now," Axel sighed.

"I kissed her tonight," I confessed.

Axel and Seifer grew silent. What is there to say? How I'm an asshole? Yeah, it was a bold move, but I missed kissing her, holding her, and loving her. If that makes me selfish then so be it.

"Did she kiss you back?" Axel asked.

"Yeah, then she slapped me and ran inside the house." I couldn't help myself but laugh.

"If you want her back, then I'll help you get her back!" Seifer slapped my shoulder.

"Yeah, she's obviously not happy without you, so I'll help too." Axel grinned.

"Ha, thanks, guys…" With my friends by my side, I could probably get her back in my life…

"I need a drink." Axel went into Cagalli's closet (since he knows I store all my alcohol in there) and pulled out a bottle of Fireball. "Let's drink until we pass out."

All of us drank out of the bottle until there was nothing left. We ended up sleeping on her cold floor. It was new to them, but to me, it was the same routine for months and months.


	13. Chapter 13 - Wanting Her, Needing Her

Chapter 13

Wanting Her, Needing Her

There is banging coming from the front door, but I am in no state to answer it. I woke up lying on her bedroom floor with an empty bottle next to my head. I take it Axel and Seifer left me to live their day while I mourn for her.

 **BANG! BANG! BANG!**

Who keeps banging on my damn door?! I slowly got up off the ground and rubbed my temples. My head is killing me, but I should be used to it since I have been getting hangovers every day…

 **BANG! BANG! BANG!**

"OKAY, I'M COMING!" I went down the stairs and opened the door to see a girl with long black hair. I have never seen her before, but she better have a good reason why she keeps pounding on my door!

"Hey," she said.

"What do you want? Do you know what time it is?" I grunted.

"It's three in the afternoon," she answered confusingly.

I closed my eyes and inhaled. I have been sleeping in till late afternoon unless I had to work. I mean, what's the point of waking up when there's nothing to look forward to?

"So, um. My name is Tifa, and I'm one of Zack's roommates."

Zack's roommate is standing on my doorstep?! What the hell does she want!? I want nothing to do with him or his stupid roommates. I went to shut the door in her face, but the bitch stopped the door with her foot.

"I'm here about Cagalli, not about Zack," she said calmly.

"What about her?" I snapped.

"I want to help her, and I know you do too."

How the hell does she know I want to help her? I mean, I guess it's obvious, but…

"At least, hear me out," she offered.

I hesitated, but I finally left her inside my house. I offered her coffee, even though I didn't want her to stay long, but she accepted. I couldn't stand this chick already…

"Cagalli really is a nice girl. I love her." Tifa followed me in the kitchen while I made her coffee from the Keurig.

"Yeah," I answered bluntly. "So, why didn't you just talk to her boyfriend about her?"

"Because I think you might be the only one who can help her."

I handed her, her coffee then brewed my own. We then took a seat around the dining room table to talk about how reckless my ex-roommate is.

"What do you think I can do? She's been avoiding me. She won't even make eye contact with me," I explained.

"Well, I'm not really good with advice especially since I'm in the same boat as her…" Tifa took a sip of her coffee.

"So, you came here just to tell me that?" I groaned.

"No, I want us to figure out how we can help her!" She countered.

"Fine. Why are you in the same boat as her?" I asked sternly.

"My other roommate, Cloud and I hook-up a lot like you and Cagalli did, and it's complicated…" She blushed.

Man, I thought Cagalli and I were the only one's who had a messed up relationship. I guess the situation is common?

"Sorry to hear that…" I muttered. "Do you love him?"

"Yeah, a lot…" Tifa whispered.

"Then tell him because if you don't, your little boat is going to sink, and you'll drown." I paused as she looked at me with widened eyes. "Trust me, I regretted not telling her I loved her and look where I'm at now… I drink every day in her empty room missing her while she starves herself and lives with another man!" I slammed my fist down on the table, making the chick jump.

"But, it's not too late… Maybe there's a chance you can get her back." She insured.

I began to chuckle. "Wow, you're a good roommate for going against Zack like that."

"I love Zack and I know he treats her right, but he's not the one for her… You are." Tifa finished her drink and sighed.

"How do you know that?"

"Because if a person hurts themselves for another person, while the other person is doing the same thing, then they can't live without each other," she explained.

"When you put it like that…" I leaned back on my chair.

"So, will you, at least, try harder to get her back? Do you truly love her?"

"Of course, I do!" I said harshly.

Tifa stood up from the table and looked me dead in the eyes. "Then do something about it."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After Tifa left me, Axel came over and I explained everything to him. Goes to show, he was the one who sent her here.

I was annoyed he got the douchebag's roommate involved but talking to her motivated me to take Cagalli away from Zack. Tifa's right. We can't live without each other, and I won't let Cagalli resist me any longer.

"Dude, your dog has been acting strange," Axel commented as he watched my dog limp over to his dish bowl.

"He's bummed that Cagalli left me." I shrugged it off. "He'll be fine."

"I don't know, Van… I think you need to take him to the vet."

"He's fine… Geez." I rolled my eyes. My dog is just feeling down like I am.

"Whatever you say, Vanitas."

"So, have you been talking to your boyfriend recently?" I asked teasingly.

Axel didn't say anything, but his face turned red… Has he falling for Roxas?!

"Wait, Axel… Are you gay?"

Axel took a deep breath. "I don't know. I was never attracted to guys before, but when I saw him at Sora's party, I couldn't help but grow a liking towards him…"

He wouldn't even make eye contact with me, but I'm not against my best friend being gay. If that's what makes him happy then go for it.

"Does he feel the same way?" I asked.

"He flirted with me, but I don't know if he's gay or straight or anything… I got his number and we have been texting…" Axel shrugged.

"Well, sounds like he might be interested," I said.

"Would you quit being my friend if I was gay?"

"Wow, you think I'm that heartless, huh?" I smirked.

"No, but people get freaked out when they find out their friend's gay…"

"I'm not against it, Axel. I'm happy for you. I will always be there for you, no matter what." I will never leave my friend just because he's into guys now. I'm not a homophobic but I'm shocked that out of all my friends, Axel would be the one, and he's my first gay friend, so I don't know how this stuff works.

"You will support me then?" Axel asked.

"Yeah, man. I got you." I grinned.

"Thanks, you're the first person I told…"

"If anyone tries to go against it, I'll beat them up." I laughed.

"I always can count on you, Van…"

Killer started to whimper and before I knew it, he passed out on the ground.

"KILLER!" I ran over to his body and picked him up.

"We have to take him to the vet!" Axel got out of his chair and fished for his keys.

"Don't leave me like she did," I whispered to Killer.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I laid Killer on the couch when I got home from the vet. I found out he has cancer, and there is no way they could do anything to help him because of his old age. I wanted to put him down and put him out of his misery, but I don't have a lot of money since I have to pay rent all by myself.

Killer kept whimper as I began to pet him to try and soothe him. It kills me how I can't do anything for him. I'm useless…

 **Knock. Knock. Knock.**

I heard light knocks at the door, and I went to answer, thinking it was Seifer or something, but it was… Cagalli?

"Hi, Axel told me about Killer… Can I see him?" She stared at the ground, refusing to look at me.

"Um, sure." I am shocked she is right here in front of me, but it bugs me that she won't make eye contact with me…

She walked inside the house and immediately ran over to Killer. She began to sob as Killer kept whimpering. I wanted to hold her, to tell her that everything was okay, but I knew that would chase her out of the house. Right now Killer needs her, more than I do.

I watched her as she kept petting and kissing Killer, telling him that everything was going to be alright, but we both know the truth… We both know he'll be gone.

"Do you need anything to drink?" I asked her.

"No. I just want to stay by his side for a little while, is that okay?" Again, she wasn't even making eye contact.

"You can stay as long as you want," I whispered while I went into the kitchen to pour a glass of Jack for myself.

I blame myself for not taking him to the vet earlier, but I just thought he was upset like I was…

The vet told me multiple of times that it didn't matter when I brought him in because of his old age, but I still blame myself. Everything I have been doing is wrong, and I am sick of it.

I went back into the living room and sat on the chair while watching Cagalli talking to Killer. She then surprisingly turned and faced me. We finally made eye contact.

"Have you been drinking a lot, Vanitas?"

I rolled my eyes. Has she come to mock me about my habits? "It's your fault," I smirked as I gulped my drink down.

"It's not my fault," she whispered.

"Whatever you say…" Was all I could answer to her; am I suppose to admit that I've been drinking endlessly in her empty room since she left?

"How's everything?" She asked as she kept petting Killer.

I snorted. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, how is everything going?"

I should just tell her the bloody truth how I've been torturing myself and drowning in bottles of alcohol because of her, but I couldn't do something reckless like that.

"Fine," I answered. "And you?"

"Fine," she said simply.

"You don't look fine." I got up from my seat to get another glass full of Jack.

"Neither do you," she countered.

I smirked at her sassiness. I do miss her attitude, the way she lectures me and yells at me… If I had a second chance then I would do everything right, so she's with me and not with that douchebag dude.

I mixed her a mixed drink because I know she secretly wants one. I then walked back in the room and gave it to her.

"I don't want this." She snapped.

"It is just a drink, chill." I rolled my eyes.

She sniffed it then gagged. "It's too strong."

 _Wow, she never changed…_

"Just drink it. It's not like I'm going to rape you," I said teasingly.

She stared at it for a good minute then she finally took big sips of it. I laughed at her for gagging, and I saw her smile for the first time in months…

We sat there in silence, but I didn't mind. I am just happy she is sitting here with Killer and I. We both needed her presence or something…

"So, why did you kiss me?" She took another gulp of her drink.

"Because I missed you." I felt my face growing red… Damn, her.

"Oh." She finished her drink and held the glass out to me. "I want another one…"

My eyes widened. She made a big deal about drinking the first one, and now she wants another? I am not going to complain, I mean if she keeps drinking, she might stay the night…

I downed the rest of my drink and grabbed her glass. I then went to the kitchen to make us more drinks. I should make her eat too, but I don't want her to freak out… I need to get her really drunk, so I can feed her.

As I walked back into the living room, Cagalli is sitting on the couch with Killer's head on her lap. She gave me a small smile as I handed her, her drink. She then started to chug it. I couldn't wipe the huge grin I had on my face. She is slowly showing me the old her, the one I fell in love with.

"Why didn't you get a new roommate?" She finished her drink in seconds.

"I…" I couldn't admit because I waited around for her to move back. Cagalli waited for my answer, and I just shrugged.

"I just didn't want a new one, that's all…"

"I see…"

"I broke up with Eva."

"Why?"

I wanted to tell her because _"Eva doesn't compare to you, and I realize all I need is you in my life"_ , but I didn't want to sound soft, you know?

"I just realized I didn't care for her… That's all."

Cagalli smirked. "I could have told you that…"

"Yeah, I guess." I sat on the floor next to the couch and stared at Cagalli. It might sound dumb, but I can watch her for hours if I had a choice. I could never grow tired of her.

"Why are you staring at me?" She glared at me.

"Psh. I don't know." I rolled my eyes.

She suddenly moved Killer's head and stood up from the couch. "I'll be right back. I need to use the restroom."

"You know where it's at…" I chuckled.

She left me to go upstairs and I started to pet Killer. He finally fell asleep, and I hope he can sleep in peace without being in a lot of pain. I thought very hard about what I'm going to make Cagalli eat, but I don't know what to feed an anorexic chick… It has to be soft foods, right?

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Cagalli has been gone for a while… Geez, has she fallen in or something?

I decided to go check up on her upstairs, but when I reached the bathroom she wasn't in there. I then felt my heart stop altogether… If she's in her old room I'm going to feel like a jackass!

I ran into her room and saw her examining each of the holes I have punched in the walls.

I couldn't say anything. What is there to say? _"I punched holes in your walls every day because I'm angry you left?"_ She'll think I've gone crazy, but maybe I have.

Cagalli turned to me and stared. "Why did you do this?" Her voice is shaky.

I couldn't look her in the eye. I felt like a fool. I never wanted her to see her empty room like this!

"Van?" I heard her footsteps walk up to me, but again, I refuse to look at her.

"I'm a wreck since you left," I whispered.

"I've been a wreck since I left too," she admitted.

I looked up at her and tears are forming in her eyes. I didn't know what to do… Should I hug her? Would that be a bold move? She'll run away if I tried to touch her…

"Van…" She hugged me tight and buried her face in my chest. She began to sob uncontrollably.

I didn't know what to say to her, but I held her just as tight. I am lost for words, and all I could mutter was, "Sorry."

She didn't answer me; she just kept sobbing. I rested my chin above her head, trying to think of words to comfort her… I couldn't think of any…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Cagalli and I are sitting on her bedroom floor, drinking alcohol that she found in her old closet. We both didn't speak of this room, or what we felt about each other, but I am fine with it.

Things are complicated and I blame myself for making it that way…

I am happy she is starting to smile and laugh more, but when she leaves, will she turn back into being miserable?

I want her to leave Zack… I can help her through her problems, and trust me; I won't use therapists to help her. I can help her all by myself.

"Hey…" I whispered.

"Hm?"

"If I get you a little more drunk, can I feed you?" I felt stupid asking like that, but how else am I suppose to ask?!

Cagalli frowned and gazed at the ground. "I don't think I can eat, even if I tried."

"That's bullshit, Cagalli."

"I'm serious. Kairi tried to get me to eat chips, but I could only take one bite," she explained.

I stood up and went downstairs to find her something to eat. I have to get her to eat something. If she keeps starving herself then she'll die.

I looked in the fridge and everything I have would be too hard for her to chew. I then looked through all the cabinets and found brownies.

 _Better than nothing._

I went back to her bedroom and sat down next to her. I then started to rip the brownies into little pieces to get her to eat. I handed her a piece and she just stared at it.

"Just eat it," I began to grow impatient.

She slowly took a small bite and began to chew. She is struggling, and I felt anger burning inside me. It is depressing to watch her not be able to even chew a small piece of the brownie! She used to eat a whole one in one bite!

She had a hard time swallowing, but it finally went down her throat.

My body began to tremble and I felt my eyes watering. Damn it, I can't cry… Not in front of her!

"Vanitas, I'm sorry…" She went to touch my shoulder, but I turned my back on her. I can't let her see me like this.

She tried to turn me back around to face her, but I wouldn't do it. I can't show her I'm weak… She isn't letting up, though. She kept trying until I finally turned around and pulled her into my embrace.

"Don't look at my face," I choked.

Cagalli hugged me tight and whispered, "Are… You Crying?"

"No," I lied.

I held her for a little while until I was done sobbing like a little school girl; I NEVER cry in front of anyone… I'm pathetic and useless.

"I'll be fine, Van."

"Yeah, because I'll make sure you are healthy again, no matter what," I said.

"Vanitas…"

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Killer woke up and started to whimper in pain, so Cagalli and I stayed by his side for the rest of the night. We both quit drinking since we felt really good, plus if I drank more I would probably grow angrier towards her for leaving me to live with that loser.

I kept asking her to leave him, but she only ignored me. She has to know Zack isn't doing anything for her!

"Your knuckles are bruised…" She touched them lightly.

"It's nothing." I snorted.

"Guess we both handled the situation the wrong way…"

I just shrugged. "How were we supposed to handle it?"

She stared at me dead in the eyes and sighed. "If I knew that I wouldn't be living like this …"

"Yeah, same." Is all I could say to her, I won't give up on Cagalli. I need her to eat and be back to her old self. I can't stand to see her like this.

Cagalli and I just sat there in silence as we both focused our attention on Killer. I had the spins and it is killing me inside.

I wanted to grab her and hold her, but she will deny me. She saw me break down, and I felt sick. Will she think less of me now? Will she think I'm soft?

I would catch her looking at me here and there. I wanted to know what she is thinking in her little head…


	14. Chapter 14 - Your Tears Don't Fall

Chapter 14

Your Tears Don't Fall, They Crash Around Me

 *** "With blood shot eyes I watch you sleeping. The warmth I feel beside me is slowly fading. Would she hear me if I called her name? Would she hold me if she knew my shame?" – Bullet For My Valentine –** ** _Tears Don't Fall_**

"VANITAS! WAKE UP!" I heard Cagalli screaming and crying.

I opened my eyes and sat up on the living room floor. I then looked over and saw Cagalli sobbing next to Killer.

"What's wrong?" I asked sheepishly.

"He's… Dead…" She choked on her words.

I felt like time stopped for me. My companion and best friend is dead? I stood up from the floor and hovered over the couch. She's right. Killer is lying there with his eyes closed, he isn't breathing… He must've passed away when we both fell asleep.

I felt tears forming in my eyes, but I violently whipped them away. I can't cry in front of her again…

"Do you want to come with me to bury him?" I asked, but my voice cracked.

Cagalli couldn't stop crying. "Yeah…"

I went in the living room closet to grab a blanket, and then I wrapped his body in it. I picked him up, motioning Cagalli to follow me to my car. I wanted to bury him in the woods by a park where I used to walk him at.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Cagalli held Killer while I am driving. We didn't speak to each other. There is nothing really to say.

I didn't want to bring back memories of my dog because I know I'll start crying. Cagalli kept sobbing, and it made my stomach turn. I don't like to see her cry, but I'm grateful she's here with me.

I couldn't ask for a better person to support me, to be honest.

We were finally at the park. I opened the trunk and pulled out a shovel, and we walked into the woods to bury him. It took us awhile to find a spot because we both wanted a good place to put Killer. I then found a perfect spot under a giant tree.

"That's a good spot, Van," Cagalli whispered.

I only nodded as I began to dig a hole for him. It didn't take me long, and she set him in the hole. We looked at him one last time before I buried him.

"Should we say a few words?" She asked me after I was done.

I looked down at him and shook my head. "No."

"Vanitas, I think we should." Cagalli insisted.

I couldn't talk about Killer. I didn't want to break down. It wasn't me, it's not who I am. I do not mourn or cry over people or animals, yet here I am growing soft because of Killer and her.

"I'll start then." Cagalli cleared her throat. "Killer, when I first met you, I was scared of you, but I immediately changed my mind when you laid on top of me and we slept together. You are always there for me when I'm alone, or when I just needed a cuddle buddy. You are the most loyal dog I have ever met, and I admired you dearly. I just hope when you're in doggie heaven with the other dogs, you won't forget about Vanitas and I because I know we will never forget about you. Thank you for always being there through the good times and bad. I love you."

I turned away from her and the grave and covered my eyes with my hands. Her stupid speech made me lose it! I knew we shouldn't have said a few words to him!

I felt her arms wrapping around from behind me. "It's okay to cry sometimes…" She whispered.

"It's only okay if you are weak," I mumbled. I tried my best to stop crying, but it wasn't working.

"Vanitas…"

I took a deep breath and turned around to face her. "Your stupid speech made me cry."

She gently smiled at me and touched my face with both of her hands. "Sorry…"

We both stared at each other for a while and then before I knew it, my lips are pressed against hers.

I didn't dare to deepen the kiss; I know she's going to regret kissing me… I really miss kissing her all of the time…

We both pulled away and just what I thought, Cagalli regretted it. It was written all over her face.

"We should go," I said. I didn't want her to say it first. This is probably the last time I will see her before she avoids me again.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"I can drop you off at Zack's if you tell me where he lives," I mumbled. We are on our way home from the park.

"Um, you can just drop me off at Kai's. Zack isn't going to be home for a couple of days, so I've been staying with Kairi until he comes back," she explained.

"Alright."

The ride back felt like it was taking forever. None of us talked, so I blasted the radio to try and ease the tension, but I still felt it.

It is pissing me off that she regretted the kiss, but it's whatever, I guess.

I'm finally at Kairi's and she got out of the car.

"Sorry, I kissed you," I whispered.

Her eyes widened, but she only nodded. She didn't say a word as she walked into Kai's apartment. I felt like someone punched my stomach over and over again as I drove off to go back to her empty bedroom.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Pure usual, I am drinking in her room, and my phone kept ringing. It was Eva, and I just ignored it. She's been calling me ever since I dumped her ass. Why can't she just take a hint?

Shiki and Alexia have been trying to hit me up too, but like Eva, I just ignore them too. They're worthless to me now.

 **Ring. Ring. Ring.**

Annoyed, I picked up the phone. "Eva, leave me the hell alone!"

"Dude, it's me!"

 _Axel._

"Oh, ugh. Sorry, man… What's up?" I scratched the back of my head.

"How's everything?" He asked.

"Well, Cagalli came last night, and stayed over, but Killer passed away."

There was a long pause. "I'm sorry to hear that."

I took a huge swig before I answered. "It's fine. He's in a better place, but Cagalli will be avoiding me for a while."

"Why?"

"Because I kissed her after I buried Killer…"

"Smooth, Vanitas. Kissing your girl next to your dead pet," he said sarcastically.

"Dude, shut up!" I snapped. "The timing was right… I don't know."

"Well, why don't you, Seifer, and I go out tonight?"

"And do what?" I rolled my eyes. The last thing I wanted to do was to go out.

"We'll just go out to a bar. Nothing big."

"Fine."

"Great, I'm driving since you'll be wasted before I see you. I'll pick you up around eleven!" Axel chuckled.

"Yeah, see you at eleven," I mumbled and hung up the phone.

I haven't been out in months. I don't feel like dealing with people, especially drunken jackasses.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"SHOTS!" Seifer shouted out to the bartender.

It's only eleven forty-five and he's faded. Axel was encouraging the dumbass to drink more. I shouldn't have gone out, I rather have been in her room.

"Cheer up, buttercup!" Axel ruffled my hair.

"Never call me that ever again." I glared at him.

Seifer picked up the shots and handed them to us, but I'm surprised all the alcohol was still in there because he spilled them all over the place.

We all cheered then downed our shots. I am feeling tipsy, but it didn't do me any good. I am still thinking about her.

"I miss the old Vanitas when he used to be fun," Seifer whined.

I just ignored him. I don't have to waste my breath on an idiot like him. I felt someone tap on my shoulder; annoyed I turned around and saw Eva. Great, now I know I REALLY should have stayed home!

"What do you want?" I spat.

"Why have you been ignoring me? I love you!" Eva went to wrap her arms around me, but I violently pushed her away. I don't want this hoe to touch me.

"I don't love you! Get it through your stupid skull!" I barked.

The bitch is obviously wasted. She couldn't even stand straight. "I heard your dog died. I'm sorry… I can make you forget about him for tonight," she said seductively.

Does she ever quit? "Look, I love someone else, so get the hell away from me!"

"Is it Cagalli?" She freaked.

"Yeah, now go away! Lose my number and let me live in peace!" I glared at her.

She finally got the hint and walked away from me. I finished the rest of my drink and stood up from the barstool. I am ready to bounce.

"Where are you going?" Axel questioned.

"Home, see you!" I left my two idiot friends and decided to walk home. It isn't really a far walk, so I didn't mind it.

 **Ring. Ring. Ring.**

I thought Eva would be the one calling me since she doesn't know what a "break-up" is, but it was Kairi instead.

"Yeah?" I answered the phone.

"VAN! OH, THANK GOD!" Kairi screamed in my ear, making me pull the phone away from me.

"What's wrong?" I asked annoyingly.

"It's Cagalli!"

My stomach is in knots. "What about her?"

"She's getting arrested! I don't know what to do!" Kairi started to sob.

"Where are you?!"

"We are by some bars by the campus!"

"I'll be right there!" I hung up and started to sprint to get Cagalli out of this situation. There's no way my ex-roommate could handle spending a night in jail… They would eat her alive!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It is not hard to spot where Kairi and Cagalli are located because there are flashing lights from the cop cars. I don't know how I'm getting her out of this one; cops hate me.

I walked over to Kairi who waved me over.

"Thank god you are here!" She praised.

"Where is she?"

Kairi pointed at the two officers who are talking to Cagalli. The stupid girl is drunk off her ass. She is in handcuffs and is spinning in circles!

"Ma'am stay still!" A female officer barked at her.

But, of course, my stubborn ex-roommate didn't listen… I face palmed my forehead before approaching them.

"Hello, officers." I greeted.

"And who are you?" A male officer eyed me.

"I'm her really good friend… What did she do?" I asked.

"LOOK, I'M LIKE A DOG CHASING ITS TAIL!" Cagalli screamed as she is still spinning in circles.

"Put her in the cop car!" The female officer ordered the male.

"Wait!" I shouted.

"She's going to jail no matter what… There is nothing you can do!" The female officer glared at me.

"I can't go to jail! I'll get raped! I'm not tough at all!" Cagalli pleaded. "I'll do anything, anything!"

The male officer put her in the back of the cop car and came back to where the female cop and I were standing.

"So, what did she do?" I asked again.

"She assaulted a paramedic," the female cop answered.

I looked to where Kairi is standing and she is talking to two paramedics. Why are they even here?

"One of the girls, who is Selphie is in the ambulance and they took Cagalli inside too, but Cagalli swung her hand at one of the paramedics because she refused treatment," the male officer said.

"But, she can refuse treatment…" I muttered.

"But, you can't slap a paramedic!" The female cop yelled.

"Look, she's an idiot and that was wrong for her to do that, but she's wasted. I can take her home, and we can just forget about this…" I will do anything to get Cagalli out of this situation.

"You are going to take her home?" The male cop asked.

"Yeah," I answered.

"Well, I guess that's fine, but she is getting a citation." The female cop stated.

"That's fine." I rolled my eyes.

I gave the officers my address to send the citation. I'll just pay it for her, even though, I'm annoyed she got that drunk.

They took her out of the back of the cop car, and she is bitching how her wrists are hurting. Man, I haven't seen her this drunk in a very long time. She then ran over to me and gave me a huge hug.

"Thanks, Van!"

"Let's go back to my apartment," I mumbled.

Kairi went in the ambulance to see Selphie then she said her goodbyes to us. I had to give Cagalli a piggyback ride since she couldn't walk to save her life…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Honestly, all I didn't want was that needle in me, and I kept telling them that!" Cagalli moaned.

She kept saying how she didn't want a needle in her arm the whole walk, but we are finally back at the apartment, and I just want us to go to sleep.

"Would you be freaked out if we shared a bed together?" I asked.

Cagalli paused for a second then shrugged. "I guess it would be okay."

We both went upstairs and I just jumped on my bed. I didn't care that I still had my jeans on; I was beat. This whole day was exhausting. Cagalli lied next to me and deeply sighed.

"I'm not really tired. Are you?" She asked.

I wanted to tell her to shut up and sleep, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I can tell she is shaken up from being in handcuffs. The girl has never been in trouble with the law before.

"I guess not." I turned my body, so I am facing her. I couldn't make out her features because it's so dark in my room.

"No, you are probably tired. Let's just go to sleep… Thanks again for saving me, Van."

"Why did you drink that much?" I wasn't letting this go. She was foolish for doing that.

"I was thinking about Killer and went overboard. Sorry…"

I deeply sighed and stretched my arms out for her. "Come here."

She hesitated, but then she moved her body close to me. I wrapped my arms around her, so she couldn't leave my side.

"Vanitas… Why did you apologize for kissing me?"

I froze in place. What am I suppose to answer to that?! She knows my feelings towards her, so I don't know why she wants me to always explain myself. What is there to even explain?

"I thought you wouldn't want me to kiss you since you have that stupid boyfriend."

"Yeah, I have to tell him about that when he comes home. I felt so guilty for it. I told Kairi we kissed, but I kissed you too! It's not your fault. I wanted to kiss you," she explained.

 _She wanted to kiss me_

"Wow, Cagalli… You aren't the cheating type," I said teasingly.

"I know! I feel so guilty." She whined. "But, I don't regret kissing you…"

"Why don't you just leave him and be with me," I said.

She nuzzled against my chest. "I don't know."

"Like, I'm the one who's always there for you. I was there to protect you from Zexion, and now I saved you from going to jail. What has he done?"

"He treats me right…" Her voice trailed.

"Yeah, okay." I rolled my eyes.

There was a long pause, but I am still holding her. I missed her being close to me. She is wearing her perfume that she always wears. Don't ask me what it is called, but it smells good.

"Have you been thinking about Killer?" She asked.

"Yeah."

"Me too… I guess I didn't take his death too well," she whispered.

"It's okay… At least, you aren't in jail right now," I said simply.

"What do you think would happen to me if I was in there now? I know I'm NEVER drinking again!"

"You can drink again, but only if I'm around because your little boy isn't going to do shit." I laughed out loud.

"Please stop talking about him. You're so mean!" She snapped.

"Okay, drunkie."

"Has your girls tried talking to you?" She asked.

"Nah, I mean they try, but I ignore them. Eva saw me at the bar tonight, but I made it clear that we are never going back out," I explained.

"Oh."

"Why? Are you happy that I'm not bothering with anyone?" I asked seductively.

She ignored me and I realized I have crossed the line. I needed a cig, but I don't want to move because she's on me. We better go to sleep soon, or I'll drive myself crazy for not smoking.

She lied perfectly still on me and I guess she passed out. I started to stroke her hair while I watched her sleep. I'm dead tired, but damn, I can watch her sleep for a little while.


	15. Chapter 15 - I'm Happy Wondering

Chapter 15

If You Don't Want To Say Anything At All; I'm Happy Wondering

 *** "Don't tell me the bad news. Don't tell me anything at all. Just tell me that you need me and stay right here with me." – Good Charlotte –** ** _Wondering_**

It is late afternoon and Cagalli is still in my bed. I had to go to work soon, but I wanted her to stay in my bed forever. She is knocked out; who could blame her, though? She drank a shit ton last night.

I took a deep breath before nudging her.

"Cagalli?"

She moaned in response and turned her back away from me. "Go away…"

I chuckled at her. "I would love for you to be in my bed all day, but I have to work. Unless you want to wait until I come back?" I desperately wanted her to wait for me all day. It would be something to look forward too… Wow, I'm such a sad person. Damn.

"I can't." She yawned. "Zack is coming home, so…"

"Ha, that douche," I muttered.

Cagalli sat up from the bed and stretched. "Thanks again for saving me. I owe you."

 _Yeah, you should dump that tool and be with me…_ I thought to myself.

"Yeah, it was nothing. Don't worry about it." I shrugged.

"Um, did we do anything last night?" She asked as her cheeks turned bright pink.

"Nah, you just talked a lot," I smirked.

"Oh, sorry if I annoyed you," she whispered.

"It's fine… Very entertaining actually."

Cagalli looked at her phone and sighed. "Kairi kept calling me, but I guess I missed all her calls. She's my ride back, so I should call her now…"

"I can take you back to her house, or are you going to Zack's?" I want to drive her back to Zack's so I know where he lives…

"No, she can drive me to Zack's…"

"Look, just get ready to go and I'll drive. I have to go to work anyways, so I'll just drop you off on my way there," I said.

She hesitated, but then she nodded. "I guess that would be okay. Well, I'm ready when you are. I'm just going back to sleep when I go back anyways."

"Lazy, lazy girl."

"Shut up, Vanitas…" She pouted.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I drove to Dunkin' Donuts to make her eat a chocolate donut before she goes to that tool's house. She kept refusing it until I parked on the side of the road and shoved it in her damn mouth! I didn't shove the whole thing, but I made her eat piece by piece. I finally made her eat the whole donut; it took thirty minutes and I'm already late for work.

"My stomach hurts, Van!" She snapped.

I started the car again and listened to her directions to get to Zack's house. I can't wait to see where that douchebag lives!

"Every time I see you, I'm making you eat, got it? You look gross all skinny like that!" I grinned.

"Geez, thanks." She rolled her eyes at me.

"I'm just saying… You look better before. I miss the old you."

"The old me…" She repeated.

"I'll make sure you'll go back to her," I said with determination.

"Okay… Oh, turn right here!" She pointed to the right.

I turned and I am in front of a decent sized apartment. I guess it has to be a decent size if there are four people, including Cagalli living here.

"Thanks for the ride…" She gently smiled as she hoped out of my car.

"Yeah, we should hang out soon."

She stared at me for a brief moment and nodded. "I would like that."

She then walked to the apartment and went inside. I finally knew where that idiot lives, ha. I might have to steal her away from him… I began to drive off to speed to work since I'm already late, to begin with.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am covered in blood from these stupid cows. It's a busy day today for me, but thank God I don't have to see any of the customers because I work in the back… Cid, my boss is getting on my nerves, though. He keeps pushing me around… Chill, dude.

"Someone is here to see you," Cid said to me.

"Who?" I asked.

"Your cousin… You have five minutes!" He barked.

"Alright." I rolled my eyes and went out the back door since Cid doesn't want his customers to see me all bloody…

Sora grinned at me as I walked up to him.

"What's up, cuz?" I asked.

"I just proposed to Kairi and she said yes!" He started to jump up and down like a little freak.

"That's great to hear…" I knew they would get engaged sooner or later.

"We are waiting until after we graduate!"

I raised a brow. "You are seriously waiting two more years?"

"Yeah, she agreed with me too!" He pointed out.

"Well, whatever works…"

"We are all going to celebrate at some bar, do you want to come?" He asked me.

"I'm sure Zack and Cagalli wouldn't want that," I smirked.

"Oh, well, we didn't invite Zack, just Cagalli." Sora scratched the back of his head.

"Why?"

"Um, Kairi didn't want me to invite him because she wants you and Cagalli to get back together, even though, I think Zack is perfect for her," he explained.

"Thanks, Sora," I said in a sarcastic tone.

"I'm just saying!" Sora whined.

"I guess I'll go since she'll be by herself. Hit me up where you guys are going then."

Sora nodded. "Sounds good, have fun at work!"

"Yeah, whatever."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I watched all the blood go down the drain while I am in the shower. Tonight is my chance to take her away from him. She belonged to me in the first place, so I have to win her back. I wonder if Cagalli knows I'll be there…

After I finished washing all the blood off of me, I changed into skinny jeans and a T-shirt. Sora texted me where they were drinking at, and it was just a casual dive bar.

Zack better not be there because if he is, then I would probably punch the living shit out of him.

I laughed to myself as I pictured me beating him up as I began to start chugging a bottle of Brandy. I have to be a little buzz before I face her again. My plans will only work if I'm drunk as hell.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Axel, Seifer, and I are at the dive bar and we spotted our friends immediately. We walked up to them and sat around the table next to them. Cagalli chugged her drink as soon as she saw me.

"Congratulations, Kairi," I said smoothly.

"Yeah, congrats!" Axel and Seifer yelled at the same time.

"Thanks, guys!" She grinned.

I began to order shots for everyone and we all cheered for Sora and Kairi.

This is my kind of celebration, drinking until I can't remember anything…

Cagalli looked at her phone and sighed. "I'll be right back." She then got up and left.

I couldn't help but watch her walk away from the table. She wore a tight fitting dress and I felt myself growing hard from just looking at her.

"Wow, you're really staring, Van," Axel said teasingly.

"Ha, so? She looks damn fine, what can I say?" I couldn't take my eyes off of her.

"She still has a boyfriend, dude." Seifer chimed in.

I just snorted. "I can take her off of him…"

Cagalli came back, but she had a frown on her face.

"What's wrong?" Kairi asked.

"Yeah, you don't look so good," Selphie added.

"Well, Zack is hanging with his ex, and I don't know if I'm okay with it or not, but I trust him, so…" Cagalli faked a smile.

"He's a good person, he wouldn't cheat, Cagalli." Riku soothed.

"Yeah, you're right." Cagalli nodded.

I didn't want to sit here and talk about that douchebag all night, so I changed the subject. "Why were you in the hospital, Selphie?"

Selphie's face turned red. "I drank way too much, and I had to get my stomach pumped."

"Ouch." Wakka cringed.

"I'm fine." Selphie insisted.

It grew silent between all of us. I hardly talked to any of Kairi's and Sora's friends, so I am debating to just sit at the bar, but I wanted to hang out with Cagalli… The people that are all here for Kairi and Sora are Riku, Selphie, Olette, Hayner, Wakka, Tidus, Cagalli, and my two friends. Should I just ask Cagalli to come up to the bar with me?

"Are you sure you are okay, Cagalli? You look upset." Tidus asked in concern.

I felt anger burning inside me. If I came here just to hear her bitch about her boyfriend then I'm just going to leave. I don't need to waste my time on this shit! I slowly stood up and decided to go sit at the bar by myself. I immediately ordered rum and coke.

I needed to get faded and fast!

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am still at the bar while everyone else is at the table. I refuse to go back and listen to her whine about him. I felt trashed, and it felt pretty damn good. I might be leaving after this last drink…

"Hey."

I turned my head to see Cagalli standing there before me. "Hey," I greeted back.

She took a seat next to me and ordered a pineapple and vodka. I hurried and paid for her drink while she insisted she wanted to pay for herself, but I got my way.

"Are you drunk?" She asked.

"A little bit." I examined her. Her face is beat red, and her eyes are bloodshot. She has to be on the same level as me.

"Me too." She started to chug her drink.

"Are you drinking a lot because of your little boyfriend?"

She shook her head. "No, I knew I would be drinking a lot, so…"

"Cool."

"Um, what are you doing after this?" She asked.

"Why do you care?"

"I was just wondering," she mumbled.

"I'm going back home… You should come with me since your boy is busy with someone else."

"He's not cheating on me, Van." She scowled.

"I didn't say he was."

"I have to go to the bathroom!" She stood up and sprinted to the restroom.

I am getting her back if it is the last thing I do. I chugged the rest of my drink and went to the girl's room to ambush her. As soon as I opened the restroom door, she squealed.

"VANITAS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?!"

No one is in here but us, so this is the perfect opportunity to kiss her. I slowly walked up to her and pinned her against the wall.

"Stop," she whispered. Her cheeks are bright pink.

"I'm taking you away from him. He doesn't deserve you." I claimed her lips with my own. She kissed me back and shoved her tongue in my mouth; I couldn't stop myself from smirking, she wanted this too. She started moaning as we kept kissing. I grinded against her and she began to pant. She needs me like I need her…

As we kept kissing, we heard the bathroom door open and there stood Kairi with her mouth hung open.

"I… Ugh, Sorry!" She covered her eyes and ran out the door.

"Um, maybe we should go…" Cagalli whispered.

"Not yet." I grinned devilishly at her as I began to kiss her again.

She didn't refuse me, so I unpinned her. I then trailed my hands under her dress and I wasn't surprised to feel her soaking.

"My, my someone doesn't have underwear on, you bad girl…" I began to rub her with my fingers and she moaned in response.

"We can't do this in here!" She couldn't stop moaning.

"Come back to the apartment then." I pulled my fingers away from her and licked them. I then put my fingers on her lips. "Lick yourself off of me," I ordered.

She hesitated but did as I said. She sure licked them clean too…

"Are you coming back with me? I drove so let's go," I said.

She only nodded and I pulled her dress down so she wasn't exposed to anyone. I then wrapped my arm around her waist to help guide her out of here.

"Oh, and Cagalli?"

"Yeah?"

"If we ever date, you are wearing underwear in public, got it?"

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"VANITAS!" She screamed my name as I kept sticking my tongue inside her. She's already soaking, but I wanted her to release for me. I kept going and going until she warned me about her limit.

I made sure I got every last drop before rising above her. She averted her gaze and began to pant.

"What should I do to you now?" I asked seductively.

"Um, wait here!" She got up from my bed and ran out of the room.

Confused, I sat on the bed and waited for her. She better not back down. I'm hard as a rock!  
"I'm back." She came in and lightly pushed me down on the bed. "I'm going to try something, so please don't freak out," she warned.

I blinked a couple of times. "Ha, like I could ever be freaked out by you."

"Just relax…" She spread my legs and touched my length. I felt something really cold on it!

Is that an ice cube? I looked down and saw her with an ice cube in her mouth. She is going up and down with it. I thought my penis would go soft, but it didn't… It felt strange in a good way.

"If you got this idea from your stupid boyfriend then I suggest you stop." I snapped at her; since when was she bold like this?

She took the ice cube out of her mouth so she can speak. "I never did this to him. I just thought about it while you were pleasing me. Kairi told me she does it to Sora all the time," she explained.

"Oh." Wow, I feel like an idiot for saying that now. Who knew I could get jealous over her stupid boyfriend?

"Doesn't it feel good?" She asked.

"It does… So keep doing it."

She put the ice cube back in her mouth and continued to run it down my length until the ice cube dissolved. I sat up and pulled her arm, so she is on my lap. Our foreheads are touching and she is straddling me.

I then slowly put my penis inside her, and she began to move. I moved with her and we are in sync. She threw her head back and kept moaning my name over and over again.

 _Am I better than that asshole? Do I make you feel better?_

Those questions kept running through my mind. I hated to think about them hooking up. It kills me…

"Keep saying my name, baby," I whispered.

She did as I said and kept calling my name. She then touched my face with her hands and we locked eyes. We both increased our pace and I began to French kiss her. I should give her love marks all over so when that douche sees them, he'll flip shit! But, I knew I couldn't do it…

She stopped to pant, but I pushed her down on the bed, so she is lying on her back. I re-entered her and began to pump in and out. She felt so warm, and I almost slipped out of her, but I kept going.

She's _tight and warm._

"Vanitas, it feels good," she said.

Her breasts are bouncing up and down as I kept thrusting. I then pulled out and commanded her to lie down on her side. She did as I said and I pumped into her sideways. She then turned her head, so she can kiss me. I felt my lips growing numb from kissing her all night, but hell, I'm not complaining.

"Your piercing is hitting me hard." She moaned.

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked.

"No, I like it…"

I kept pumping in her until she released a second time. She even cried out my name… I wanted her to reach her limit again, so I kept going. I made her get on her knees and I forced her head down while her butt is up. I started to thrust violently because I am going to release soon.

She kept screaming until we both released together. We lied down next to each other on the bed while we tried to catch our breath.

"Cagalli."

She turned her head to look at me. "Yeah?"

"I love you," I whispered.

Her eyes widened. She looked scared like she saw a ghost or something… She then sat up on her bed and began to cry.

"No, you can't!"

What does she mean I can't love her? She slept with me, yet she doesn't feel the same way?

"So, what just happened meant nothing?" I snorted.

"No, it did. I'm just confused. We would never work out, Van."

I gripped my sheets tight in my grasp. "You're just a hoe then."

She started to sob harder as she got off the bed to find her dress. What have I done? I shouldn't have called her that! I knew she wasn't, but I'm pissed she said we wouldn't work out!

I got up from the bed and wrapped my arms from behind her. "I'm sorry, you're not one. I'm just pissed."

"Why?" She asked.

"Because I know you love me too, and I know we would work out!"

I let go of her and she turned around to face me. "Van, I'm so confused."

"On me and him? Just chose me!" I grunted.

"But, I don't want you to hurt me anymore!" She sobbed harder, making my heartache. I put this girl through hell…

"Sh, it's okay. I will never hurt you again, I swear to God." I pulled her in my embrace.

She didn't say anything and I held her for a very long time. I will not put her through all this trouble any longer because I know deep down, she is the one and I can't live without her.


	16. Chapter 16 - Why Can't Romance Save Us?

Chapter 16

If This Is True Love, Why Can't Romance Save Us?

 *** "I'm tired and lonely and stupid and crazy. The lies, the excuses, I'm totally useless. My patience is fading, you're so aggravating and I can't even stand myself. – Crash Romeo –** ** _Serious_**

I went to reach out to her, but she was gone. Confused, I sat up on my bed and looked over to the side where she was supposed to be. Yeah, she was gone. I started to grow aggravated. She regretted sleeping with me, so she ran back to that asshole's place.

I'm not giving up on her. I will get her away from him! I got up from my bed to get ready for work. The sex was great, but apparently, it wasn't good enough for her.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Work was slow, so I was bored as hell. My phone started to go off and I immediately answered it.

"Yeah?"

"Vanitas! What are you doing?" It was Kairi.

"I'm at work. What's up?" I bet she's calling me about Cagalli.

"Well, I found out from Cagalli that she and Zack might be going on vacation, and I want you to stop them!" She explained.

I rolled my eyes. "So, Cagalli slept with me and now she and her boy are going on vacation. Great."

"Yeah, he just asked her as soon as she came back to his place," Kairi said.

"So, what do you want me to do, Kai? I can't stop her. She chose him over me. I told her I loved her and she left without telling me."

Kairi paused for a second then sighed. "Van, she does love you! You just played her too much! It is your fault, you know!"

"Look, I learned my lesson, but I don't know what to do!" I grunted.

"Get her not to go! I don't know!" Kairi ordered me.

"Cagalli is a grown girl, if she wants to go with him, then let her go." It wasn't a big deal she's going on vacation with him, it's not like they are going to get married or something…

"Um, it is a big deal if she goes on vacation with him," she muttered.

"Why?" I snorted.

"Because he's going to propose to her during their vacation! I found out from Tifa!"

My eyes widened. That low life dude is going to propose to her?! I have to stop this! "I know where he lives. I'll get her off of him even if I have to attack him!"

"He's at work, so just talk her into going back with you! Hurry!" Kairi pleaded.

"Alright. I'm going to leave work early." I hung up the phone before she answered me.

I walked out front not caring about the screams and looks I am getting from the customers about the blood all over me.

"VAN!" Cid shouted.

Before he started to lecture me, I held my hand out to him so he would shut up. "Can I leave work early since it's dead."

"Why should I let you?" He raised a brow at me.

"Because this stupid girl that I love might be getting proposed to another man and I want to stop it," I answered.

Cid thought for a moment then sighed. "Alright, but this is the only time!"

"Yeah, yeah."

Without wasting any more time, I sprinted to my car to get her out of this situation. I won't let her marry him, even if she does love him more than me.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I parked in front of the tool's house and walked around the apartment to see where his bedroom is located. Figured, it is the top floor and I have to climb to see her.

I began to climb up this huge tree next to the window. From climbing Kairi's tree next to her place all the time, it was easy for me to climb trees.

I kept climbing until I am next to his window. I am lucky it is open.

I then jumped off a tree branch and I am holding onto the windowsill. My feet are dangling, but I pulled myself up and went inside Zack's room.

Cagalli looked at me with widened eyes. She is lying on the asshole's bed. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to get you," I said simply.

"Get out! Zack is coming back in another hour!" She hissed.

"Did you tell him what you did last night?" I asked.

She averted her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, but we're going to fix our relationship! We're going on vacation as soon as he comes home from work."

"Did you know he's going to propose?"

"What?! NO!" She freaked. "Who told you that?!"

"Kairi found out from his roommate," I answered.

"Why would he do that?! We didn't date for that long!"

"Well, I'm not going to let it happen," I said.

Cagalli grew silent, but I'm not going to let her refuse me. I know I messed up and I know I treated her like shit in the past, but I've changed. I can give her the world. I will always be there for her, no matter what…

"Come on, Cagalli. What can I do to make you love me again?"

She got up from his bed and walked up to me. "I don't think there's anything you can do. You don't love me, Van. You never did."

I cupped her face with my hands. "I've always loved you. I was just afraid to love you. I never felt like this with anyone else, but you. I've changed, though. I will take care of you, Cagalli."

She stared at me for a brief moment then shook her head. "I can't. I have to move on, Vanitas."

I felt pain growing in my chest as I backed away from her. So, this is it. She has chosen him over me, and what we had meant nothing to her. I couldn't even speak; I just stood there like an idiot.

"If he is what you're looking for then I guess I'll back off," I mumbled.

I didn't wait for her response; I just jumped out the window and landed on a tree branch. I looked back at her and she just stared at me. I then climbed down the tree and left her there.

 _If he makes her happy then I have to move on too._

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The room is spinning. I lost track of time, but I am in my own little world. I didn't feel like getting up off of her floor. My body and mind are numb from the alcohol. I can't move on, what the hell was I thinking?!

 **Knock. Knock. Knock.**

I closed my eyes and ignored the knocking…

 **Knock. Knock. KNOCK!**

I stood up from the floor and grunted. I then went downstairs and opened the door to see Cagalli standing there before me. What is she doing here?!

"Hey," she whispered.

"What is it?" I asked sternly. I should've been a little nicer towards the girl, but after what I went through today, I wanted nothing to do with her right now.

"I broke up with him…"

"Wait, what?!" Was I hearing things?

"I broke up with him after he came home, and I told him that I was never over you…" She explained.

"Cagalli…" I didn't know what to say. I mean I'm happy she broke up with him to be with me, but what made her change her mind?

"I just knew I was fooling myself into thinking I would move on…"

 _That's my answer._

"Come in." I let her walk past me and I shut the door behind her.

"So, where do we go from here?" She asked.

"That's a good question."

"Are you drunk, Vanitas?"

"You already know the answer." I rolled my eyes.

She wrapped her arms around me and nuzzled against my chest. "I love you."

"I love you too," I said and started to play with her hair with my fingertips.

She looked up at me and gently smiled. "I'm so happy right now."

"Me too, but where's your stuff?"

"It's at Kai's. I moved everything out…" She answered.

"Well, I guess tomorrow I'll move them here…"

"Wait, you want me to move back in with you?" She interrupted.

"Yeah, don't you want to live with me again?"

"Of course… Are we moving too fast?"

I just snorted. "Not fast enough." I picked her up and dropped her on the couch. I then leaned in and kissed her firmly.

"Van!" She tried to talk, but I kept kissing her. She's back with me, and I promise, she won't regret it. I'll be the man she always wanted.

I unzipped her hoodie and roughly pulled it off of her. Then I pulled her pants down along with her underwear. She took her own bra off and threw it on the rest of her clothes.

"Can't we do this in your room?" She asked.

"Nah, I can't wait any longer…"

I licked my lips and began to rub her body with my fingertips. Her body is warm and it is reacting the way I wanted it too.

I teased her breasts until she begged me to quit messing with her. I then slid a finger inside her, making her say my name. I pumped my finger in and out as I watched her reactions.

She kept telling me to stop looking, but I didn't want to. I love to watch her as I pleased her.

I then slid another finger in and she spread her legs open for me for better access. I leaned in and started to suck on her neck. I can now leave marks on her if I wanted to because she is officially mine and no one else's.

I finally slid a third finger in and pumped in and out very fast. Her hips are rocking back and forth as I kept increasing the pace. I felt wetness all on my fingers and I wanted to taste them badly. I took them out and hungrily sucked them dry.

She watched me carefully while I lifted her leg up on my shoulder and thrust into her. She clenched a pillow as I kept going faster and faster.

I knew she fell in love with my piercing because she kept talking about it the whole time. She is really slippery, but it felt amazing around me.

I made her stand up and I bent her body down on the couch while I entered her from behind. I gripped her hips with my fingertips as I kept going in and out. I bet I left fingerprint marks on her hips for gripping them too hard, but hell, I don't care. She's mine.

"VANITAS!" She released all over the place.

I got out of her and sat on the couch, motioning her to sit on my lap. She sat on my lap and put myself in her. She began to bounce really fast. I forced her face to turn so she can kiss me. Our kisses are sloppy, but damn, it was hot.

We kept kissing as I started to thrust with her. We kept going until I grew bored with this position. I told her to lie down on her back, and of course, I re-entered her. As I am pumping in and out of her, I leaned down and sucked her breasts until they are both sticking out. She wrapped her legs around my waist, so I began to kiss her.

We both moaned out as we reached our climax together. I then lied next to her on the couch and spooned her from behind.

"Vanitas…"

"Yeah?"

"I love you so much."

"Ha, I love you so much too."

She turned her body so she is facing me and wrapped her arms around me. I hugged her tight, so she never lets go of me. She's not going anywhere.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"What do you want to do tonight?" I asked her.

We are cuddling in my bed watching a scary movie.

"Um, isn't it late, Van?"

"It's only two in the morning," I muttered.

"Well, all the bars are closed, so what is there to do?"

"We can go riding around," I suggested.

"Okay!"

We both got out of bed to ride around in my car. It is starting to get warmer out because spring is approaching.

Cagalli and I always used to ride around town during the spring because it was something we enjoyed together.

"We should go to the park!" Cagalli said as she went in the passenger's side.

"Yeah, that would be chill." I got in my car and turned my key in the ignition.

We laughed and sang on the way to the park. Cagalli and I both suck at singing, but it is funny to hear one another.

She is starting to get back to her old self, and it's all thanks to me. Soon, she'll be back to her normal weight and we'll live a perfect life together. I will always be there to protect her.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Wow, look at all the stars, Van!" Cagalli pointed at the sky full of stars.

"Yeah, it's pretty dope."

We are walking around the track in the park. Cagalli wanted to see Killer's grave, but I refuse to see him tonight. I would only go if I were by myself because I knew I would break down and cry. I made a promise to myself that I would never cry in front of her ever again.

"Vanitas, Who's that?"

I looked over to see a man standing in the middle of the park. It was hard to make out his features, but I recognized him once he said my name…

"Hello, Vanitas," Saix said in a low voice.

"Saix." I am not happy to see this idiot.

"Ah, I see you're with that girl you've protected," he commented.

"And so what if I am?!" I snapped.

"Van, let's just leave," Cagalli whispered.

I ignored her. "If you're going to cause trouble, then throw the first punch!"

Saix came running towards me to attack, but I hit him first with my fist! He backed away, and I didn't hold back as I continued to throw punches at him. He blocked some, but the others I hit him good! Cagalli kept screaming for me to stop, but I didn't want to. I want him to suffer like the rest of his crew!

"Please, Van, Please!" She begged.

I turned around to face her. "Wait by the car then!"

I'm such an idiot because I let my guard down, and Saix punched me in the face! I felt a bruise forming as I started to attack him again, but I am too pissed off that I kept missing him. He kept firing punches back at me, and the asshole kept hitting my face and chest.

"Vanitas!" Cagalli tried to get me to stop fighting him, but Saix went to hit her!

"Move!" I pushed her out of the way and hit him in the jaw. He dropped to his knees and panted.

"Don't you ever try to attack her, got it!?" I kicked him in the gut and he rolled over on the ground.

"Van…" Cagalli examined Saix panting on the ground, but I immediately wrapped my arm around her waist to take her back to the car. I'll never let anyone lay a finger on her.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Owe!" I screamed in pain as Cagalli applied ointment on my wounds.

"Sit still! I'm almost done!" She studied every bruise on my body and put more ointment on a bruise that is on my cheek!

"STOP, IT BURNS!" I grunted.

"Well, maybe if you would've listened to me, and stopped fighting with him then you wouldn't be injured!" She snapped.

"Did you seriously think I could lose to him?" I mocked.

"No, but I knew you would get hurt a little bit!"

I rolled my eyes as she put a couple of band - aids on me. We then went back to my room to lie down. It was pretty late, but I wasn't tired yet. I wanted to stay up all night with her.

"Van?" Cagalli snuggled into me.

"Yeah?"

"Please don't fight any more people. I know you can defeat them, but I hate to see you like this."

Ha, what a strange girl. A lot of women love it when a guy fights in front of them, but Cagalli is way different from most women.

"Alright, I won't fight anymore."

"Thanks, Van."

I pulled her body on top of mine and wrapped my arms around her.

"Have you been going to your spring classes, Cagalli?"

"No, have you?"

"Nah."

"Wow, and you only had one more semester too!" She giggled.

"It's whatever. I'm not worried about it."

She began to lightly touch my chest with her fingertips. "Hey, what are we going to do about my room?"

"I have to patch up all the holes in the walls, but why don't we just share my room? Don't you want to sleep with me every night?"

She looked up at me and smiled. "Yeah, but I have too many clothes and I know they are not going to fit in here, plus I want my old bedroom to look presentable!"

"Alright, I'll get started on it tomorrow after we move all your shit back in here." I ruffled her hair.

"Thanks, Vanitas." She yawned.

"Go to sleep…" I whispered.

"Okay, goodnight, Van."

"Goodnight, Cagalli."

I watched her the whole night as she slept on top of me. I kept rubbing her back and I listened to her breathing. She's always beautiful when she sleeps… Hell, she's beautiful all the time. She doesn't even have to try. She usually moves around when she's sleeping, but tonight she stayed perfectly still on me. I tried to force myself to sleep since I'm moving her shit in the morning, but I couldn't stop watching her…

 _She's mine; all mine._


	17. Chapter 17 - Annoying Brother

Chapter 17

Annoying Brother

"Vanitas, you didn't patch the hole up good!" Cagalli grunted.

"Hey, give me a break. I moved in all of your stuff and I already patched ten holes. I'm getting tired!" I regret punching these stupid holes in the wall now because I seriously have to patch up twenty more holes!

"I'm just saying," Cagalli mumbled.

I turned around to face her. "Did you eat all of your breakfast?"

Cagalli hesitated before she answered me. "I ate half of it."

"I told you I want you to eat every last bite while I do this, so finish eating or I'll force it down your throat," I threatened teasingly.

Cagalli left the room mumbling something, and I continued to work on these stupid holes. This is going to take all day, but I am happy she moved back in here with me. I will not let her leave me. I refuse to go through this trouble again.

I started to hear knocking on the front door, but Cagalli said she is going to get it. I bet it's either Axel or Seifer…

"VENTUS!" I heard Cagalli squealing from downstairs.

 _Ventus?!_

I felt my body trembling. What is my stupid younger brother doing here?! He never comes to visit… I never liked my idiot brother. He acts like a little bitch and our parents idolize him because of his GPA; that's the only useful thing about him, he's smart when it comes to books, but when it comes to common sense, he has none.

Cagalli met my brother a couple of times back when she was still in high school. I hated when they talked because he always flirted with her, and she would flirt back. It bugged the hell out of me.

"Vanitas, your brother is here!" Cagalli shouted from downstairs.

"I'm busy!" I shouted back.

"Oh, take a break!" She said.

I rolled my eyes and headed downstairs to see my stupid brother. He's only a year younger than me, and a lot of people would say he looks more like Roxas. They do look identical from each other.

"Hey, Vanitas," Ventus greeted.

"You didn't tell me you were coming here," I mumbled.

Cagalli slapped me on my back. "Be nice, Van!"

I deeply sighed. "Do you need anything?"

Ventus blushed. "I, well. Our parents are out of town and I was wondering if I could stay with you guys." He stuttered.

"No," I said simply.

Cagalli slapped me on the back again. "Of course, you can stay, Ventus!"

"Cagalli, can I talk to you in the kitchen?" I clenched my teeth.

Cagalli glared at me, but she headed towards the kitchen and I followed right behind her.

"Why did you say he could stay here?" I barked.

"Because he is your brother and you never see him! Can't you be nice to him for just a couple of days!?"

I thought for a moment and shook my head. "Nah. He's annoying, Cagalli." I didn't want to admit that I get pissed when he flirts with her. I would sound like a little bitch...

"Come on, Van…" She leaned into me and stared deep into my eyes.

"Whatever." I brushed her off and went back in the living room to face him.

"I could always ask Sora," Ventus whispered.

"No, Van doesn't mind! We are happy that you want to stay with us." Cagalli cheered.

"Great!" My idiot brother grinned.

"Well, I'm getting back to work on your room, Cagalli. I'll talk to you later," I muttered.

"Vanitas, you can do that later," she said.

"No, I want to get it done now!" I snapped and headed upstairs. Cagalli didn't even bother to call out my name. She knew I am pissed about my brother staying here.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I stayed in her room all day to patch these holes while she and my annoying brother went out and did stuff. I wanted nothing to do with him. I rather just patch holes for months than to face him. What really sucks, is that I finished these holes faster than I wanted to, but I decided to watch T.V. in my room since Cagalli and Ventus were still out.

"Ventus, this is really good!" I heard Cagalli from outside.

 _Spoke too soon. They're home._

I took a deep breath and went downstairs to see them, and I grew shocked to see Cagalli with an ice cream cone in her hand.

"How did you get her to eat?" I asked.

Ventus shrugged. "Everyone eats ice cream, brother!"

"Did she, at least, give you a hard time?" I felt angry. She better of put up a fight with him… She always gives me a hard time when I try to get her to eat!  
"Ugh, no…" He answered.

I glared at Cagalli who just kept licking her stupid ice cream. This has to be a joke, right? My brother got her to eat with no problems, but I have to yell at her to take a small bite out of something?!

"I need a drink," I muttered.

I went into the kitchen and poured a glass full of Absolute. If my brother is staying here for a couple of days, then I might as well drink until I can't remember him being here.

"Van?" Cagalli came into the kitchen and frowned.

"What?"

"Are you mad at me?" Her voice cracked.

"No, just annoyed. Go have fun with him. I'll be out there in a second," I sighed.

She did as I said and I looked at the shelves to see if I had enough alcohol for a couple of days and luckily I did. I then went into the living room and sat on the chair while Cagalli and Ven sat on the couch.

"So, are you dating anyone, Cagalli?" Ventus asked.

"Well-"

"She's dating me!" I interrupted her.

Ventus eyes widened. "Wait, really?"

"Yeah, we decided it yesterday actually," Cagalli answered.

"Wow, I'm just shocked… I thought you guys would never date," he commented.

"Yeah, same here, actually!" Cagalli laughed.

I chugged my drink halfway and grunted. What is there to be shocked about us dating? Yeah, I treated her poorly, but if I were hanging with her for years and years, obviously we would start dating sooner or later.

"Are you dating anyone, Ventus?" Cagalli asked.

"No…"

I just smirked at his answer. Who would date a fool like him?

"I'm sure you'll find someone! You are very good looking and you're smart too!" Cagalli soothed.

She never said I was good looking… What the hell? Does she think he's better looking than me? This is high school all over again. I always get jealous of my brother. Everyone in my family and friends makes over him, but it really bothers me when SHE does it.

"Don't you think he'll find someone, Vanitas?"

What am I suppose to say to that?! I chugged the rest of my drink and went back into the kitchen to refill my cup. This ruined my whole day. I hope he rots in hell.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It was early evening and Cagalli and my annoying brother are still all over each other. It was getting on my nerves, so I grabbed the rest of my Absolute bottle and went upstairs in my room. Why couldn't he just stay at Sora's?!

As I turned my T.V. on, my phone began to ring.

"Yeah?" I answered.

"Yo, it's me, Axel!"

"What's up?"

"Dude, I'm nervous!" Axel freaked.

"About what?"

"About Roxas!"

"Are you hanging out with him, or something?" I asked.

"Yeah, and he hinted to have sex!"

"Well, I guess he's into guys too. There you go."

Axel took a deep breath. "Yeah, but I never had sex with a guy before!"

"Why are you calling me about this? I have never been with a guy either!" I groaned. Great, now my best friend wants advice on gay sex. This day is getting better and better.

"I don't know. I thought you might have some advice for me…"

I deeply sighed. "There's only one hole. You just stick it in there, that's all."

"I KNOW THAT!" Axel snapped.

"Then what do you need help with?"

"Um, I…"

"Look, just take it slow and I'm sure you'll be fine."

"Alright… I'll try. Thanks, Van."

"Yeah, good luck." I hung up the phone and focused my full attention on the T.V. screen. I wish Cagalli were here to cuddle instead of entertaining my brother.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Van?"

I opened my eyes and saw Cagalli hovering over me.

"What time is it?" I must've falling asleep.

"It's midnight. Your brother is sleeping on the couch. Move over."

"Shouldn't you be sleeping on the couch with him?" I asked coldly.

"Why would I sleep on the couch with him?" She blinked a couple of times.

"Well, you two were all over each-"

"Are you jealous?" She interrupted.

I turned my head to avoid her gaze. "No."

She started to laugh. "You're ridiculous."

"It's not funny!"

She got in bed with me. "Why do you think I like your brother?"

I snorted. "I don't."

"Is that why you were so mad?"

"No," I answered simply.

She cuddled next to me and I wrapped my arm around her, so she was closer to me.

"You never called me good looking before," I said out of nowhere.

"Vanitas, you know I always loved you and if I didn't, I wouldn't have put up with your shit for so many years." She giggled.

"Quit laughing, Cagalli."

But, she didn't. She kept laughing harder and harder.

"If you don't stop, then I'll make you," I warned.

"What are you going to do?"

I rolled on top of her and looked at her dead in the eyes.

"This." I firmly pressed my lips against hers.

She kissed me back and I undid the zipper of her jean shorts. She helped me slide them off and she immediately took her shirt off. She then undid my zipper and pulled down my pants along with my boxers. My length is sticking out right in front of her.

"Cagalli…"

She lowered herself and started to tease it with her tongue. She licked up and down. I bucked my hips as she kept running her tongue down my length, but then she decided to give my balls more attention. She popped one in her mouth, and I felt my mind spinning.

"Ugh…" I moaned out as she kept sucking one of my balls.

"Doesn't it feel good?" She stopped and stared at me.

"No, it does. Keep going…"

She did as I said and put it back in her mouth until she soaked it. She then did the same thing to the other. I am losing it.

"Um, let me take care of you now," I whispered.

"No, I need you now."

She pulled my pants completely off of me and pulled my shirt above my head. She then took her panties and matching bra off. We are both naked and I laid down on my back while she slid herself in me. She began to bounce. I ran my fingers from her breasts to her hipbones. She felt amazing on my length!

"Wow, Cagalli…" I praised.

She threw her head back as she circled jerked me. She's riding me like a pro!

"Close," she warned.

"Well, I'm not sweetheart, so we got a long way to go," I smirked.

I sat up on the bed while she is still riding me. I then grabbed her small waist and made her movements faster. She moaned very loudly with every thrust I made her do.

"VANITAS!" She released all over me.

I didn't stop my thrusts and she begged for me to slow down. I rolled my eyes and got out of her. I then made her lie on the bed, and I threw her legs over her head. She watched me as I re-entered and I pumped slowly. She moved with my thrusts, but when I started to pick up the pace, she nearly lost it.

"Vanitas…" She panted.

I kept going until I released inside her. I collapsed on the bed, and she crawled and lied beside me.

"I'm tired now." She yawned.

"Don't flirt with my brother again, okay?"

She turned her head and looked at me. "I never flirted with him!"

"Yeah, you did!"

"I was just being nice!" She spat.

"Well, stop it!" I grunted.

"You're impossible, Vanitas." She nuzzled against me.

"So are you."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I woke up and Cagalli wasn't next to me. If she's talking to my brother, I'm going to punish her. I lazily walked down the stairs to see Axel in the living room with Cagalli.

"Where's Ventus?" I asked.

"He's at Sora's. He said he's going to stay there since you were rude to him," Cagalli glared.

"Good to hear!" I grinned.

Axel laughed. "You and your brother never get along!"

"Well, you should sleep with him too, Axel. He looks exactly like Roxas." I sat next to Cagalli on the couch.

"Speaking of Roxas. Last night was awesome!" Axel shouted.

"What did you two do?" Cagalli questioned.

"I don't want to hear details," I mumbled. I know Axel will talk about the sex openly, but I don't want to know anything.

"I think he's the one!" Axel cheered.

"I'm so happy to hear that!" Cagalli took a sip of her coffee.

Axel began to tell us his whole night with Roxas, but I kept interrupting when he would try to give us details about the sex. I love Axel, but I do not need to hear it especially when it's with my cousin.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Wow, you did a great job redoing my room!" Cagalli walked around her room and examined the walls.

"I told you I could do it."

"Thanks, Van!"

"But, you are still sleeping with me every night!" I ordered.

"I know, I know."

Axel left us and it was back to being just the two of us. I wish no one could bother us. I would be content to be in this world where Cagalli was the only person I saw. She is the only reason why I'm living. Wow, that sounds like something a douche would say, but it's true.

"I love you." She gave me a huge hug and I hugged her back tightly.

"I love you too."


	18. Chapter 18 - Worth Dying For

Chapter 18

Worth Dying For

 *** "I searched for love in an empty world but all I found was hate." – Rise Against –** ** _Worth Dying For_**

"Ugh, Vanitas, you know I don't like eating before I try dresses on!" Cagalli whined as she stuffed her face with a Panera sandwich.

"Geez, you bitch about being hungry and now you're bitching about something else." I rolled my eyes.

Sora wanted us all to chill before the spring semester ends… I didn't want to go, but Cagalli wanted to, so I guess I had no choice. She made me drive her to the mall to go buy a dress, even though she has tons of dresses at home…

"Are you going to finish that?" Cagalli pointed at my mac and cheese.

I slide the little dish over, so she can have it. She is finally eating! I even got her to overeat! Hey, if she gets chunky, I wouldn't care. I rather her fat than skinny… I hope she gets some fat in her breasts because they have gotten too small for my taste.

"Thanks again for taking me shopping Van!" She said with her mouthful of food.

"Yeah, it's nothing."

"Are you going to buy anything?"

"No? I have a lot of clothes at home," I snorted.

"All you wear is skinny jeans and T-shirts… Can't you change your style up a little bit?" She asked annoyingly.

"Nah."

Before she started bitching about me wearing the same shit over and over, Shiki came walking up to our table. What the hell does she want?

"Hey, Van." Shiki greeted.

"What's up?" I asked bluntly.

"Why have you been ignoring my calls? Is it true that you and Cagalli are dating now?" The bitch sounded like she is going to break down and cry.

"I've been ignoring you because I'm dating her, so lose the number," I muttered.

Shiki gasped and left us alone immediately. I hope she leaves me alone for good. I can't stand her… Why the hell did I sleep with that?

"That was kind of rude, Vanitas." Cagalli glared at me.

"So, it would've been okay to say I would hang out with her?" I raised a brow.

"No…"

"Then shut up. Are you done eating yet?" I am starting to grow impatient.

"Yeah." She quickly finished the mac and cheese and stood up. "Let's go!"

This is going to take all day. I only shopped with her a couple of times and I regret it every time; she will be in ONE store for three hours, it's ridiculous.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"How's this look?" Cagalli came out of the dressing room to show me another stupid dress.

"It's fine…"

"You aren't even looking!" She snapped.

"You tried on over twenty dresses, I'm getting tired."

She rolled her eyes and went back into her dressing room to try another one on.

My ass is starting to hurt from sitting here in this stupid room, and the most annoying part about the fitting room is the other people. There is a guy who is the same age as me waiting for his sugar mama. The woman looked twice his age and it made me cringe; I could never sleep with an older woman, it's disgusting.

"This one?" Cagalli came back out again.

"Sure," I answered.

"At least, pretend you care!" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Are you going to get it?" I asked.

"No!" She turned on her heels and went back in the room.

Another person that is getting on my nerves in this fitting room is this bratty teenager with her mother. Her mother is loud and made over everything that her daughter tried on. My ears are bleeding from them screaming about the stupid outfits…

I leaned in my chair and turned my head to the side to find something to distract me. My eyes widened when I saw Alexia standing there, waiting for a room.

"Van?" She stared me down and frowned.

"Hi," I said.

"Why are you here?" She asked in confusion.

"I'm here with Cagalli," I sighed.

"Oh, so it's true that you two are dating. I was wondering why you've been avoiding my texts."

"Yeah." Wow, I saw two of my ex-bitches in the same mall… Just my luck!

The lady who is working here finally escorted her into a room. I hope Cagalli and I leave here before her. I don't want to see her again…

Cagalli came out and my mouth hung open. She wore a tight-fitting cocktail dress that hugged her body in all the right places. I felt myself growing hard by just watching her stand there.

"You don't like this one, huh?" She asked.

I didn't say anything… I couldn't answer. I didn't like it? No, I love it… I stood up from the chair and walked up to her.

"Van?"

I pushed her into her fitting room and slammed the door behind us.

"What are you doing?"

I ignored her question and pinned her against the full-length mirror. I then covered her mouth, so she couldn't resist me.

"I wish I had something to gag you with because I'm going to make you scream," I whispered in her ear.

I removed my hand and claimed her lips with my own. She tried to pull away, but I had a tight grip on her wrists. It's her fault for making me want her. I then nibbled her ear and neck until I left a mark on both. She went to moan, but I unpinned her wrists and covered her mouth with my hand. I roughly unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor.

I am grateful she didn't have a bra or underwear on.

"Now be a good girl, and stay quiet. You don't want people to hear you get off, now do you?"

I still had my hand over her mouth and all she did is shake her head "no".

I went on my knees while I still had her mouth covered, and started to lick her sex violently. I can hear her voice muffling from under my hand, but I kept going.

Damn, she's already wet. I stuck my whole tongue inside her and she rocked her hips back and forth for me to go deeper and deeper. It didn't take long for her to release, though.

I stood up and undressed until I'm naked I then lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around me and I guided myself in her. I began to pump in and out while I covered her mouth again, so we didn't get caught. Hell, I don't care if we did, but I know how she gets…

She hid her face in my chest as I kept going. I kept whispering naughty things to her just to mess with her. I know she's going to kick my ass after this…

There is knocking at the door from one of the workers, but I'm not stopping now… The lady began to ask if we were okay, but I ignored her.

"Sh. Baby girl…" I whispered seductively in her ear.

I then put her down and turned her around to face the mirror. She put her hands on it while I have her from behind. She covered her mouth with both of her hands while I thrust in and out of her.

The bitch still kept knocking on the damn door! She kept asking us to get out of the fitting room, but I'm so close…

After a couple more thrusts, I released and Cagalli immediately turned around and slapped my chest.

"What the hell goes through your mind?!" She loudly whispered.

"It's your fault for turning me on," I smirked.

Cagalli blushed and it made me chuckle. She's cute…

"I'm going to come in there!" The lady outside the door threatened.

Cagalli and I hurried and put our clothes back on by the time the lady unlocked the door. We both got out of the room, and everyone is staring at us. I smirked because I think it's hilarious while Cagalli tried to hide behind me.

I turned around to face her. "Get that dress…"

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After I bought her that sexy dress. We went back home to get ready to hang out with everyone. I kind of want to bail and just chill with Cagalli all night, but she insists we have to go.

"Have you had sex in a fitting room before?" She questioned me.

"No, first time." I lied down on my bed while I watched her get ready.

"Oh." She is concentrating on curling her hair. I don't know why she's all excited for tonight.

"I take it, it's yours too?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"It was fun. I love having sex with you in public places." I snickered.

"Well, I don't! It's embarrassing! Did you see that woman's face when he got out of the fitting room?"

"Yeah, you didn't like it, yet you released for me." I snorted.

"Shut up and let me get ready!" She yelled.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Cagalli and I were done getting ready and everyone came over to pre-game here. Cagalli is already drunk and is hanging all over Kairi. I secretly love it when she gets drunk. It's fun to take care of her.

"Wow, you've been really staring at Cagalli," Axel commented.

I took a big gulp of my Fireball mixed drink. "Well, she's mine, so what's the big deal?"

"Nothing! I just never seen you really love a girl until you and Cagalli got together." Axel shrugged.

"Yeah, you better not mess it up… She's a keeper!" Seifer slurred.

 _He's right about that. She is one of a kind._

The people who are all going to the bars with Cagalli and I is Axel, Seifer, Sora, Kairi, and Riku. Roxas and Ventus couldn't come since they're underage and they also didn't have fakes like the others.

"Van!" Cagalli wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Hey, drunkie." I laughed.

"Aren't you drunk?" She asked.

"Not even close," I whispered.

"Lame." She let go of me and went back to talk to Kairi.

"She's sure a lightweight," Riku said.

"Yeah, but I like it." I chugged the rest of my drink and poured another. Tonight is going to be a shit show.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

We are in some type of club next to the campus. It is packed and I grew jealous of every guy in the room that kept eyeing my girl. Shit, I can't be jealous. I refuse to be that type of boyfriend. Cagalli clung onto my arm and begged me to take shots with her. Hell, I'm not going to refuse, but she better not get pissed at me when she throws up.

"I'm so excited we came out with them!" Cagalli shouted.

"Yeah, it's chill," I answered.

I ordered us shots of Rumple Minze since it'll get me drunker than anything else. We each took five shots and I grabbed her hand to take her on the dance floor.

"Van, you know I can't dance!" Cagalli tried to struggle out of my grasp.

"You aren't that bad. Come on, it'll be fun!" I got her on the dance floor and turned her around.

She started to grind on me with her ass, and I felt myself getting hot. I grabbed her hips while she kept grinding. I don't know why she complains about how she can't dance. I thought she was pretty good.

Cagalli turned her head to the side to whisper to me. "Am I doing it right? I'm kind of too drunk to know or not."

"You're perfect," I answered.

"You're really good too!"

"Not as good as you." I gripped her hips harder.

If we keep this up, I might have to force her to sleep with me on this dance floor.

"You're hard…" Cagalli gasped.

"Way to point out the obvious."

"Shouldn't we stop?" She asked.

"Well, if you want to take care of my little problem, sure," I smirked.

She turned around and buried her face in my chest. "We can't…"

"Why not?"

"Can't we wait until we get home?" She pleaded.

"I don't think I can wait that long…" I grabbed her wrist and took her outside of the club. I then dragged her in an ally way. Hey, if I could, I could take her somewhere better, but there's nowhere else to go.

"Van, we can't do it here!"

"Sh. No one will see us." I leaned in and kissed her. She kissed me back and we played with each other's tongues. I felt her body with my hands and I immediately lifted her dress up.

"Van…" She moaned in my mouth.

I inserted a finger inside her. "What did I tell you about not wearing underwear in public?" I whispered in her ear.

"That if we date that I have to wear them…"

"Yeah, so why aren't you wearing any?" I inserted another finger inside her.

"But, the dress is so tight that people will be able to see the outline of the underwear!" She moaned out.

I finally added a third finger and pumped violently in her. I'm going to punish her for not wearing underwear in public. I took my fingers out since they started to get soaked and turned her around. I then pulled her dress a little down so I had access to feel her breasts.

"Not wearing a bra either, huh?" I began to tease them with my hands.

She moaned out. "Vanitas…"

I kept teasing them until I craved to be inside her. I unzipped my pants and pushed them down along with my boxers. I claimed her from behind and didn't hold back as I thrust in and out of her.

She covered her mouth with both of her hands because she is being too loud. I didn't slow down, though. Why would I?

I kept going until I wanted to see her face. I turned her around, slammed her against the side of the building, and re-entered her. I then pulled her right leg up, so I can go deeper. I kept pumping in and out for a while until we both finally reached our limit.

After we were done, I made sure her dress was pulled down and her breasts were covered. We both decided to go home and just go to bed.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"Tonight was fun!" Cagalli lied down on my bed.

"Yeah, it wasn't bad." I agreed.

"I need a shower, though. I'll be right back!" She went around the room to grab shit she needs for the shower and left me, but after she left, I heard noises coming from downstairs.

Curious, I walked down the stairs and heard a window from the living room breaking! Who the hell has the balls to break into our apartment?!

"Who's here!?" I yelled out. I am prepared to fight.

"Hello, Vanitas." Eva is standing by the couch.

"What are you doing here?!" I gritted my teeth. Wow, I officially saw three different bitches I messed with in the same day. Why can't they all just leave me alone?

"I heard you and Cagalli are dating," she whispered as she walked up to me.

"And?" I raised a brow.

"Why do you love her more than me? I am everything you need." She tried to touch my face, but I flinched away.

"Stay the hell away from me!"

"Not until you dump her!" She went to slap me across the face, but I grabbed her wrist and squeezed it tight.

"No, she's all that I want and need." I let go of her wrist, hoping she can just leave. I don't want to deal with her any longer.

"Fine. If you don't dump her then I'll do something about that." She threatened.

I rolled my eyes. "What would you do?" She's weak. How dare she threaten me!

She pulled a knife out of the back of her pocket and aimed it at me. "I'll kill you, so no one can have you!"

"I'm so scared!" I started to bust out laughing… Is she serious right now?

She charged at me, but I easily dodged the knife. I'll give her credit for her fast movements, but she's still no match for me. I wanted to punch her in the face so hard, but I don't believe in hitting a girl even if they're psycho bitches.

"Die!" She went to slash me again, but I stepped back, yet in a blink of an eye, I heard a loud gasp and was shocked to see Cagalli on her knees with her arms wrapped around my waist.

 _She protected me with her body?!_

"CAGALLI!" I kneeled down and held her. There is blood pouring out from her back. Why the hell would she shield me?! When did she even come down the stairs?

"Vanitas…" Cagalli gave me a weak smile.

I felt her blood all over my hands. How can I let this happen?! Eva dropped her knife and her mouth dropped open. She then jumped out of the broken window and ran. I didn't chase after her… Cagalli needed me!

"Why would you shield me?" I felt tears rolling down my face. She got stabbed because of me…

"I love you, Vanitas," she whispered.

I held her closer to my body and buried my face in her chest. I need to get her to the hospital!

"Vanitas…"

I looked into her eyes. "You need to go to the hospital. Never do this again!"

"I can't make that promise because you are worth dying for." She closed her eyes while I screamed her name over and over again to wake her up. I need her… She's wrong; SHE'S only the one worth dying for.


	19. Chapter 19 - Coming Back To Me

Chapter 19

Forever You Coming Back To Me

 *** "Let me be the one to numb you out. Let me be the one to hold you, never gonna let you get away." - Three Days Grace –** ** _Painkiller_**

 ****I watched her unconscious body on the hospital bed. I felt horrible for what happened to her. How did I miss her blocking Eva's blade? It happened so fast, but I refuse to make any excuses. Cagalli is hurt because of me!

"CAGALLI!" Kairi came storming into the room and threw her arms around Cagalli's body.

"QUIET!" The old lady yelled. The old fart's bed is next to Cagalli's. I am annoyed the nurses put Cagalli in a room with this bitch… I wanted Cagalli to have her own room.

"Sorry…" Kairi tried to quiet her sobs, but she couldn't control them.

I watched as Kairi sobbed next to her. I felt guilty. I wish I were the one lying on the hospital bed, and Cagalli was the one sitting in this chair.

"How is she?" Sora came in the room and asked.

"The doctor said she'll be unconscious for a while, but she should be alright when she wakes up… He said she would feel a lot of pain from the wound on her back, but he's going to give her pain killers," I explained.

"Well, that's good to hear." Sora sat next to me.

"She could've been dead because of me…" I rested my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands. I didn't want anyone to see me like this.

 _I'm weak._

"It's not your fault, Van." Kairi sniffed.

"Yeah, it is… Eva wouldn't have attacked us if Cagalli and I didn't make it official," I whispered.

"So, you're saying you would never have made it official? You know if you didn't do that then she would still be with Zack, and you would've died from alcohol poisoning or something!" Kairi paused and took a deep breath. "I know Cagalli. She's stubborn and she would've tried to save you no matter what the consequences are. It's the same situation with you protecting her from Zexion at Demyx's party."

"She's got a point." Sora agreed.

"But she's in pain because of my stupid ex… I shouldn't have gotten that drunk, but hell, I just thought Cagalli and I were going straight to bed after the club!" I shouted out.

I didn't see or hear Cagalli shielding me because I was drunk. Again, I'm not making excuses, but if I were sober then we wouldn't be here. Eva would be the only one in a hospital bed, and Cagalli and I would be sleeping peacefully.

I wish she would wake up. I need to see her beautiful, bright eyes… I want to take her back to the apartment and take care of her until she's in perfect health.

"Don't be down, just pray for her recovery." Sora patted my back.

"Yeah, no use in me acting like a little bitch," I muttered.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

All our friends visited Cagalli while she is still unconscious. I wanted to cry like a little bitch after I explained to everyone how Cagalli got hurt. They all told me it wasn't my fault, but it was… Why does she have to be the one to suffer? She didn't deserve this… I do…

I said my good-byes to everyone and I am finally alone with her (and the old fart, but I try to ignore her presence). The nurse kept asking me to go home because visiting hours were over, but I refuse. I will stay by her side until I get her out of here. The nurse gave up after awhile and let me spend the night in her room…

I am wide-awake watching her breathe slowly. I whispered old memories we shared and held her hand even though she couldn't hear or feel me. Maybe I was trying to take care of myself because it helped me to touch and talk to her.

"I love you, Cagalli Range." I kissed her on the lips.

I sat back in the chair next to her bed and texted everyone that's been blowing up my phone about Cagalli…

"Vanitas?"

My eyes widened as I got up from the seat and I immediately hovered over her. "Cagalli?"

"Hey." She gave me a weak smile.

The doctor told me she would be unconscious for a while, but I'm happy she's awake… I can't wait to get her out of here!

"Hey," I greeted back.

"Are you okay?" She asked in concern.

I felt guilty all over again. Why would she ask if I was okay? She's the one who got hurt not me!

"Cagalli, you're the only one that got hurt…"

"That's good," she whispered.

"No, it's not… Why would you jump in front of me?! I was scared you would've been…"

"Dead?" She interrupted.

I buried my face on her hospital bed. I didn't want her to see me weak again.

"I'm fine, Vanitas. Just a little sore," she insured me.

"Never do that again."

"Huh?"

"Never protect me! I am the only one who will be doing the protecting, got it?" I started to play with her hair.

"But, I want to protect you…"

"No!" I shouted out.

"I AM TRYING TO SLEEP! SHUT UP!" The old bitch yelled out of nowhere.

"NO ONE IS BOTHERING YOU!" I grunted at her.

"Oh! Someone is sharing a room with me?" Cagalli turned her head to see the old woman. "Hello, there, my name is Caga-"

"NO ONE CARES!" The old bitch spat.

Cagalli's eyes widened and she leaned in to whisper in my ear. "When can we leave?"

"The doctor says he has to run some x-rays, but I'll get you out tomorrow afternoon," I explained.

Cagalli nodded. "Okay, but Vanitas?"  
"What?"

"Why can't I protect you?"

"Because I cannot go through this again. I felt guilty and depressed. I can't live without you, Cagalli. I rather be dead and you move on than you leaving me in this stupid worthless world!"

"I can't live without you either. I could never move on if you left me all alone in this world," she whispered.

I leaned in and kissed her firmly on her lips. She needs me like I need her…

"GO TO SLEEP! YOUR LOVE IS MAKING ME SICKER THAN I ALREADY AM!" The old lady killed the mood.

"SHUT UP, YOU OLD BITCH!" I clenched my teeth.

"VANITAS!" Cagalli slapped me on top of my head. "Be nice!"

I rolled my eyes, but I am happy she is awake and is back to her old self.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

It was the afternoon, and the doctor took x-rays and tests on Cagalli. Cagalli and I both stressed how we just wanted the painkillers so we can go home. The doctor did promise us that we would be out of here before tonight.

"How are you feeling?" I asked.

"I'm still sore, but that's it. I'm sure they won't find anything wrong with me…" Cagalli said as she is eating her pudding.

I am trying to keep my cool, but I am nervous as hell! I hope her wound didn't get infected, or she doesn't have to go into surgery.

"I'm fine, Vanitas." Cagalli giggled.

"I didn't say you weren't!" I snapped.

"Yeah, but I can tell you are worried about me. I'm good!"

 _She wasn't able to figure me out before, but now she sees right through me._

The doctor came in and cleared his throat. "I have some shocking news."

"IS SHE GOING TO BE OKAY?!" I freaked out.

"Yes, yes, but we found something interesting in her tests…" The doctor's voice trailed.

"What is it?" Cagalli and I said in unison.

"Cagalli Range is five months pregnant!" The doctor announced.

"WHAT?!" Cagalli screamed out in horror.

"KEEP IT DOWN!" The old bitch snapped.

The first thought that popped in my head was…

 _I'm going to be a father?_

"THIS IS GREAT!" I grinned.

"Wait, what?" Cagalli looked at me with a confused look.

"You are carrying my kid inside you!" I went to touch her stomach, but she slapped my hand away.

"I wouldn't celebrate yet," the doctor said sternly.

"Why?" I raised a brow.

"Have you been eating properly, Cagalli?" The doctor asked her.

"At first, no. I was starving myself a couple of months ago, but Vanitas has been helping me to get back to my eating habits," she explained.

"Well, you need to get back to your eating habits now because your baby hasn't been getting enough nutrition. If you don't give it enough nutrition, then it will end up dying…" The doctor whispered.

"I'll make sure she eats enough!" I chimed in. I want our baby to be healthy.

Cagalli has to eat for two now. I'm going to make her eat once every hour no matter how much she argues with me… It's obvious why we couldn't tell if she was pregnant, her stomach wasn't showing because she's bone thin. She never even mentioned about her time of the month… It never crossed my mind that she never had it for a while.

"Just to make sure, I want Cagalli to visit this hospital every three days to make sure the baby will survive," the doctor said.

"That won't be a problem." I nodded.

"Great, do you want to know the sex of the baby?" The doctor questioned.

"YES!" I shouted out.

Cagalli just sat there and shrugged. Why am I the only one happy that she's pregnant?

"Cagalli?" The doctor waited for her permission.

"Yes, I want to know," she said in a small voice.

"It's a girl!" He grinned.

"I'm going to have a daughter!" I felt like it was Christmas for me. Wow, I haven't been this happy since Cagalli moved back in the apartment.

"Is there any more questions?" The doctor asked.

"I have one." I cleared my throat. "Did Cagalli's injuries affect the baby?"

"No, you both are very lucky. Just make sure she comes back every three days and feed her," the doctor answered.

"Okay, that's all for me," I said.

The doctor left Cagalli and me alone, but Cagalli is really quiet. I know for a fact that the baby is mine since she's five months pregnant. She moved in with that douche three months ago, and Cagalli told me she only slept with him a couple of times during those three months…

She must've been pregnant before she moved in with him… I wish we knew this before because she would've been mine earlier yet I can't change the past. What is done is done.

"What's wrong with you? Don't you want me to be the father of your child? Would you rather that bastard Zack be the father?" I couldn't help myself but be angry. Why isn't she excited?

"No, no! I'm happy you're the father, but how are we going to take care of her? We can hardly take care of ourselves!" She frowned.

"We'll make it work, I promise! I want what's best for her," I whispered.

"Maybe the best solution is adoption."

I felt my eyes darken. "I will not put our child in a foster home! I refuse!"

"But, Van-"

"If you don't want the child then I'll take care of her myself!" I spat.

"I wouldn't trust you with children," the old lady muttered.

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" I shouted at her.

"I want to take care of her too, but you promise you won't run away? Will you stay by my side during the whole pregnancy?" Cagalli asked.

"Is that why you are scared? You think I'm going to leave you with our child?" Wow, she really thinks low of me.

"I don't think you would, but a lot of men do it. They usually leave the woman after the child is born," Cagalli sighed.

I took her hands in mine and looked her dead in the eyes. "I promise you, I won't leave you. I'm hard to get rid of, so you're stuck with me, got it?"

Cagalli gently smiled and nodded. "Got it."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I finally got Cagalli out of that hospital. She is starting to lighten up about the baby. She is talking about buying baby clothes right away, and how she wants to turn her old bedroom into a nursery. I honestly want to get the hell out of our apartment and own a house. I don't want my daughter raised in an apartment that's next to a college full of drunken students.

"Is it okay if Kairi hangs with us tonight?" Cagalli asked, as I made sure she is comfortable in my bed.

"It's your apartment too… Of course, she can come over."

"Thanks, Van."

"I wanted to go out anyways…"

Cagalli's eyes widened. "Where are you going?"

"I'm just chilling with Axel and Seifer, no big deal." I shrugged.

"Okay."

"I'll wait until Kairi gets here before I leave. Do you need anything right now?" I questioned.

"No, I think I'm good. I'm just really tired since that old woman kept us up all night in the hospital." She yawned.

"That crazy bitch." I rolled my eyes. "Alright. Don't lay on your stomach and I'm ordering Kairi to feed you all night."

"Whatever," she sighed.

Not too long she passed out and I couldn't take my hands off of her stomach. My baby girl is in there, and I can't wait to meet her.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Kairi was at the apartment and I left her to take care of Cagalli. I had something important to do and I needed my friends to help me. I'll be annoyed if they don't take this seriously.

"Dude, I think you should've asked Sora to come with us," Seifer asked.

"We don't need him!" I spat.

"Yeah, how hard can this be?" Axel asked.

The three of us walked inside the Tiffany & Co. store, but all our jaws dropped when we saw how many rings there are. How the hell am I going to find the perfect one?!

"Wow, I'm glad I'm not going to propose anytime soon," Seifer muttered.

"I'm glad I'm gay!" Axel grinned.

"May I help you?" A worker asked us. The way he is looking at us pissed me off. I know he's judging us.

"I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, but I don't know what ring to get. It has to be perfect," I explained.

"Geez, look at Van getting all cutesy!" Axel laughed out loud.

The worker smirked. "Are you sure you can afford any engagement rings?"

I took a couple of racks out of my hoodie pocket. "Ha, I got it covered dude."

The worker sighed and nodded. "Right this way."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

The worker showed me countless of rings, but none caught my eye until I saw something sparkle in a jewelry case far away from us…

"Can I see that one?" I pointed at the glass case across from us.

The worker walked over and took the ring out of the glass case then handed it to me. I examined it and immediately grinned.

"This is the one," I whispered.

Axel whistled. "Wow, it looks expensive."

"She'll love it!" Seifer cheered.

"It's fourteen thousand seven hundred." The worker cleared his throat.

The diamond is rounded and the band had little diamonds all around it. I know she will like this one.

"I'll take it." I immediately handed all my money to the worker while Axel and Seifer congratulated me, but they shouldn't celebrate yet… She still has to say "yes".

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Axel, Seifer, and I returned to the apartment and we immediately went upstairs to see Cagalli. She is sitting up, eating a hoagie while Kairi watched her.

"Oh, hey Van!" Cagalli immediately eyed the light blue Tiffany bag. "What's that?"

"Stand up for a second," I ordered softly.

She looked at me like I was crazy, but she did as I said. I then took out the small box out of the bag and went down on one knee.

"Cagalli Range, will you marry me?"


	20. Chapter 20 - Have Faith In Me

Chapter 20

Have Faith In Me

 *** "I said I'd never let you go, and I never did. I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it. If you didn't have this chance then I never did. You'll always find me right there, again." - A Day To Remember –** ** _Have Faith In Me_**

My heart is racing a million miles per hour as I studied her reaction. She stared at the ring with widened eyes. For a brief moment, I was afraid to hear her answer, but I didn't regret asking her to marry me because I want to be with her for the rest of my life.

Everyone around us is quiet as Cagalli kept looking at the ring. She finally took a deep breath to answer my life-changing question.

"Yes! Of course, Vanitas!" Tears are running down her cheeks. She officially made me the happiest man alive.

I put the ring on her finger then stood up. She wrapped her arms around my neck and we kissed each other firmly. Everyone clapped and cheered for us. I can't believe she said yes! I have the girl of my dreams! She's mine; all mine.

"Congrats, guys!" Kairi squealed.

"I knew she would say yes. You worried for nothing, Van!" Axel chimed in!

"So, when's the wedding?!" Seifer asked.

"Well, we should do it after our daughter is born," Cagalli suggested.

"What!? Nah, let's get married before that! I can't wait any longer!" I argued.

"But, Van! I'll be a fat balloon if we get married with our child inside me!" Cagalli snapped.

"Plus do you even have a place in mind to get married at?" Kairi deeply sighed.

I thought for a moment and something clicked. "The gazebo!" I shouted out.

 _Perfect Idea._

"Gazebo?" Kairi, Axel, and Seifer asked in unison.

"Oh, you mean the one where we used to hang out during high school?" Cagalli questioned.

"Yeah, that one! What do you say?" I cupped her face with my hands.

"It is a nice gazebo, plus there's a lot of land for everyone to sit around… Okay, we'll get married in our gazebo!" She kissed me softly.

"You ALSO need time to pick out a wedding dress AND to pick out your bridesmaids… I'm the maid of honor, right?!" Kairi jumped up and down.

"Of course, you are!" Cagalli giggled. "I guess we'll have to start looking tomorrow, and I have a couple of bridesmaids in mind…"

"Isn't your back sore?" Seifer asked.

"It's a lot better than what it was, so I'll be fine to look at dresses. I got my painkillers to save me if it starts to act up!" Cagalli said.

"So, what's the date?" Axel crossed his arms over his chest.

"In two months!" I grinned.

"How about three?" Cagalli raised a brow.

"No, two!" I snapped.

"Alright, fine, fine," she sighed.

 _This last minute wedding is going to be the best thing that's ever happened to us._

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

 **TWO MONTHS LATER!**

I felt my pulse sweating as I waited patiently for Cagalli to come down the aisle. The last two months have been hell. Cagalli and Kairi would get on my nerves on how I'm rushing into this wedding, but I wanted her to have my last name as soon as possible. I want everyone to see her with her wedding ring on and realize she is taken by me!

A lot of our family members, friends from high school, and from our college attended our wedding. My best man was Axel while Sora, Ventus, Roxas, Seifer, and Riku were my groomsmen.

Cagalli's maid of honor was obviously Kairi and Yuffie, Tifa, Selphie, Rinoa, and Xion were her bridesmaids.

"Why are you nervous?" Axel whispered in my ear.

"I'm not nervous!" I snapped.

"Keep telling yourself that," Axel muttered.

FINALLY! I see Cagalli! Her grandfather is escorting her because it was his dying wish to walk her down the aisle since he's not doing too well.

Everyone stood up from their seats and stared at my bride while she is walking towards me. She wore a tight-fitting white dress, and she had a veil that covered her face. I was lost for words and I couldn't take my eyes off of her.

"She looks amazing, Van!" Axel whispered loudly.

"I know," I smirked.

She stood next to me and I pushed her veil up, so I can see her beautiful face. We then turned our attention to the priest. He talked for a long time, which is annoying because my legs are starting to hurt for standing in the same spot for who knows how long! But, after he said his long speech, it was time to exchange our vows. I am actually excited to tell her how I feel!

"Cagalli, when I first met you, I knew you would be the one for me, but I took you for granted and to this day I still regret it. I should have told you how I felt when I first met you, but I was scared to fall in love. After years and years having you in my life, I was grateful even though I didn't show it." I paused and looked her dead in the eyes. "It killed me when you left our apartment to be with someone else. That's when I realize I can't live without you. I made sure to get you back no matter what the cause was. I will always love you and never take you for granted ever again! I will show you every day how much I love and care for you, and I can't wait to see our daughter for the first time. I love you, Cagalli Range. I can't wait until you are officially mine." I took a deep breath after I gave my vows and gently smiled at her.

Cagalli smiled back at me as tears went down her cheeks. "Vanitas, I want to say how much I love and adore you. I'm so happy that I am going to be your wife! I can't wait to start a family with you, and I just want you to know that I can't live without you, so please stay by my side for the rest of my life. Thank you for always being there for me through the good times and bad. I love you so much, Vanitas. I can't picture myself with anyone else, but you."

After Cagalli was finished with her vows, everyone began to cheer and clap. Cagalli tried her best to stop crying, but her tears kept falling.

The priest waited until everyone stopped cheering and looked straight at me. "Vanitas, do you take Cagalli to be your lawfully wedding wife?"

"I do," I said simply.

"And Cagalli, do you take Vanitas, to be your lawfully wedding husband?"

"I do." Cagalli grinned.

Cagalli and I exchanged our rings to each other, and waited patiently for the priest to seal the deal!

"I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may now kiss the bride!" The priest announced.

I leaned in and kissed her lips firmly, and she kissed me back with no hesitations.

 _We are finally together forever. I will always love her with all my heart._

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Our reception has started. We are having it at a country club that my aunt owns, and I am shocked the room is huge! It was Kairi's idea, but hey, I'm not complaining. It is actually pretty cool.

"I'm so happy to finally be your wife, Vanitas." Cagalli laid her hand on top of mine. We are waiting for our food to arrive.

"I'm happy to be your husband and the father of your child," I whispered to her.

Weddings weren't really my thing unless it was an open bar, but I would do this wedding over and over again with Cagalli any day. I just can't wait for the honeymoon. She has no idea about it because I wanted it to be a surprise even though I know she hates surprises.

"EVERYONE LISTEN UP!" Axel clanged his wine glass to get everyone's attention.

Everyone stopped talking and turned their full attention on my best man.

Axel stood up from our table and cleared his throat. "I just want to say how honored I am to be Vanitas' best man, but I wanted to share a funny story with you all! Vanitas here acts all hard because he can drink better than any boy on campus, but one night he overdid it!" Axel paused as everyone gasped. "Anyways, it was Van, Seifer, and I that went to some lame house party since we were all underage at the time. Everyone at the party was drinking downstairs in the basement, but there were way too many people, so the neighbors called the cops and they were on their way to shut down the party! Vanitas freaked and he made Seifer and I push him out this small basement window. His pants AND boxers fell off, but I guess he didn't notice. Seifer and I kept yelling at him to put his pants back on, but he sprinted away from the house! We followed him and kept trying to tell him that he had no pants on, but he didn't care. Everyone on campus saw his manhood AND his white ass! It was great!" Axel and everyone in the room laughed out loud, causing me to slam my head on the table.

"Awe, it's not that embarrassing!" Cagalli chuckled.

"Shut it…" I muttered.

"But, here's to Vanitas and Cagalli! I knew this day would come, and I know they will make each other very happy! CHEERS!" Axel raised his wine glass.

"CHEERS!" Everyone shouted out.

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

After we all had our meals, everyone went on the dance floor to dance and give requests to the DJ. I made Cagalli dance a couple of slow songs with me then I drank a lot with the guys at the bar. Kairi and I would meet privately to talk about the honeymoon since she helped me plan the whole thing.

Cagalli and I have to leave in a couple of hours to catch our flight. We are going to Destiny's Island where Sora and Kairi used to live. I've been there a couple of times, but Cagalli hasn't. I know she's going to love the beach. The water is clear and the sand is white. It's the perfect place for a honeymoon.

"Vanitas?" I heard Cagalli's voice.

"Shit, got to go!" I told Kairi.

"I'll get you two when it's time to go!" Kairi called out as I sprinted to see Cagalli.

"Where were you?" Cagalli asked.

"Sorry. I was just going to get some fresh air."

"Oh, I see…"

"Do you want to come with me?" I suggested.

"Sure!"

I grabbed her hand and escorted her outside. It is pitch black, but there are some stars out in the open sky.

"Wow, you're getting big." I praised as I pet her stomach.

"Stop, you know how I get self-conscious about this baby bump!" She snapped.

"Are we still not going to have sex until after the baby is born?" I frowned. I haven't had sex in over two months since we found out Cagalli is pregnant. She gets weird about us having sex with our daughter inside her plus she's self-conscious about her weight even though she has nothing to worry about! She looks perfect; I just wish she could see it for herself.

"I'm sorry, but please just wait a little longer… It's only a couple more months." Cagalli patted my shoulder.

"I guess," I muttered.

 _I'm making her sleep with me during our honeymoon, no matter what!_

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

"IT'S TIME, GUYS!" Kairi announced to Cagalli and me.

"Time for what?" Cagalli asked.

"To go off on your honeymoon!" Kairi clapped her hands together.

"Wait, you set us up a honeymoon!?" Cagalli squealed.

"Of course," I said simply.

"Where are we going?!" Cagalli gasped.

"You'll find out soon." I grinned devilishly.

"But, I hate surprises!" Cagalli whined.

"Well, too bad!" Kairi pushed us out the front door to the country club

"Now go! You are going to be late for your flight!"

I took Cagalli's hand in mine and walked to Sora's car. He is driving us to the airport to drop us off. I can't wait to see her reaction when we land.

 _A whole week of paradise with just her and I… Oh, and our little daughter too._


	21. Chapter 21 - I'm Losing

Chapter 21

I'm Losing And This Is My Real Life

 *** "Please just follow me. I thought you wanted me. Cause I want you all to myself." - Marianas Trench –** ** _All To Myself_**

 _She's going to love this._ I thought as I touched my arm that is wrapped up.

I am waiting in the suite for Cagalli to come back. She went shopping on her own. I offered to go with her, but she wanted some alone time I guess…

We've been at Destiny's Island for a couple of days now and we both love it. We haven't done anything too crazy since she's pregnant and all, but just spending time with her was good enough for me. We still haven't had sex because she's acting all self-conscious about her baby bump, but after she sees my arm, I bet I can make her panties drop!

"Vanitas?" Cagalli came into the room and immediately looked at my arm. "Why is your arm all wrapped up?"

"I have something to show you," I smirked as I began to unwrap my arm.

"Did you get hurt?" She asked in concern.

"No, look." I finished unwrapping my arm and her jaw dropped! "So, you like it?" I grinned.

"You got my name tattooed all the way down your arm!" Her voice rose up in shock.

"Yep." I can't tell if she likes it or not…

"Vanitas, it's so big! Like the letters are really bold and black!"

"Well, now everyone knows that I'm yours." I shrugged.

 _When is she going to drop her panties?_

"I don't know what to say." Cagalli gave me a weak smile.

"You don't have to say anything," I said seductively while I stood up from sitting on the bed to walk up to her.

She looked at me with widened eyes as I leaned in to kiss her hard, but she immediately pulled away.

"I can't," she whispered.

I felt my body getting heated up. I'm pissed… What more can I do to get my wife to sleep with me? I can't wait two months for this kid to be born, and the funny thing is, Sora told me that I would have to wait a little longer because she has to get stitches after our daughter is delivered! I can't wait that long!

"Vanitas?"

I ignored her and stormed out of the room. I shouldn't be mad at her, but it's annoying me about her insecurities. She won't even undress in front of me. She'll go to the bathroom to change while I keep telling her over and over how she's overreacting. Cagalli is beautiful no matter what size she is. I wouldn't even care if she got fat after our daughter is born… I would still love her…

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

I am at the bar on the beach drinking my frustrations away. Cagalli is going to be upset when I come back drunk, but I could care less. She's the one not giving me what I want! A couple of people at the bar kept asking me what's wrong… Why would I tell them? It's none of their business! I just want to get drunk by myself and try and forget about sex.

"Van?"

I immediately chugged my drink before facing _her_.

"What?" I snapped while I turned around in my seat.

"Are you mad at me?" There are stupid tears in her eyes. I started to feel guilty and I hated her for it!

"No," I muttered.

"Yes, you are," Cagalli countered.

I didn't answer her, I mean, what is the point? I didn't want to get into an argument with her about it. We've been fighting about it every day now and it was getting old. Why can't she just give me what I want?

"Let's go back to our room." She grabbed my arm lightly.

"Alright."

We both walked back to our room in silence, but a lot is on my mind. How am I going to survive not having sex with her? It's going to kill me! It doesn't help seeing her every second without getting hard. I have to think about dead kittens or something to get my mind off of her…

I opened the door for her and she walked passed me. My eyes immediately are glued to her ass…

 _Shit._

"Van, did you get that tattoo of my name so I would sleep with you?"

I rolled my eyes. "No." I mean, I thought this tattoo would get her to finally sleep with me, but the main reason is for everyone to know I'm only interested in her and her alone.

"Really?" She raised a brow.

"Yeah," I sighed and lied on the bed to stare up at the ceiling.

"This is our honeymoon. We should enjoy ourselves without getting mad at each other." She lied down next to me.

"Then give me what I want and we'll be cool." I chuckled.

"You know how I feel about my body."

I turned my head to look at her. "Cagalli, I know I said this a million times, but you're beautiful. I think you look dope carrying our child in your stomach. It's sexy, to tell you the truth."

"Van…"

"And I can't stop staring at you no matter where we are. I have to think about ugly things, so I don't force myself on you."

"Ugly things?" Cagalli snorted.

"Yeah, like dead kittens… Babies."

"You're awful!" She giggled.

"Just being honest."

"Do you really think I'm beautiful? Even though I'm huge?"

"Of course, I do, Cagalli. I wish you weren't self-conscious because it pisses me off."

"Why?"

"Because you're the most gorgeous girl I have ever laid eyes on. Seriously, look at my lame ass telling you these corny things… I never do that, but when it comes to you, I want to compliment you every day." I reached out and pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I love you, Cagalli."

Cagalli studied me then closed her eyes to inhale. "Fine."

"What?" I asked in confusion.

"I'll have sex with you, but we have to turn off all of the lights!" She ordered.

"Are you serious?" I groaned.

"Either we have sex with the lights off, or you aren't getting anything!" She snapped.

"Fine." I stood up to turn the lights off and rushed back on the bed to claim my wife. "I finally can have you again." I roughly pulled her sweats and underwear off her and began to lick her violently.

"You're going so fast already?!" She moaned out.

"I've been waiting to please you for a while now," I said as I stuck my whole tongue inside her. I began to go in and out and her hips are going in sync with my tongue. I felt her juices all over my tongue as I went faster and faster.

"VANITAS!" She released on my tongue and I hurried and pulled her top off of her. I then undid her bra and threw it across the room.

I felt her swollen breasts with my hands. "Wow, I can't believe how big they got."

"Stop touching them! They're sensitive!" She cried out.

I ignored her and leaned in to suck on them, but I tasted something strange…

"Oh, my God! That's my milk! Gross!" She slapped me away from her breasts, but I didn't flinch away from them. I wanted to keep sucking. The milk isn't bad as I kept licking them. I kind of like it…

I nibbled until I grew annoyed with Cagalli yelling at me for licking them. I then moved her body to the side (since she can't lay on her stomach or back because of our daughter) and spooned her from behind. I positioned myself and slammed into her. She cried out loud while I kept pumping in and out of her.

I am in heaven. I couldn't keep my hands off of her stomach. She's beautiful and she has my daughter inside her.

I wish I could change positions, but I knew I would harm the kid if I tried anything else, so we stayed in this position until we both released. I collapsed on my back and Cagalli did the same.

"That was amazing," she whispered.

"See? All that fighting for nothing…"

"Yeah."

"So, now that you aren't afraid to be with me anymore, we'll have sex five times a day!" I chuckled.

"Maybe two…"

"No, five."

I heard her sigh. "Whatever."

"And after our child is born, we'll create another," I said.

"How many kids do you want?!" She gasped.

"Ten."

"That's too many, Van!"

"Don't you want ten kids with me, Cagalli?" I tried to sound offended.

"It's not that… It's just too many! I think we should do one more and that's it!"

"What would you want our second child to be?" I asked.

"A boy."

"Yeah, I would like that…"

"We still didn't come up with a name for our daughter, you know."

I ponder the thought. I didn't know what to name her. Wasn't it the mother's job to do those kinds of things?

"Van?"

"I don't know what to name her. Don't you have any idea?"

"Wow, you want ten kids, yet you can't come up with one name," she said teasingly.

"Shut up."

"How about Amarra?"

"Amarra," I repeated. "Yeah, I like it. What made you come up with it?"

"It's my great grandmother's name. I never met her, but I always liked that name," she answered.

"Alright, we'll name her Amarra then."

We laid there in silence, but I started to think about our future. I still didn't want our daughter raised in a small apartment with college students around, but I don't know where we can move. I looked at a couple of places here, and the pricing to rent a house isn't bad at all. I just don't know if Cagalli would like the idea of living here.

"What are you thinking about?" Cagalli asked out of nowhere.

"About our daughter."

"Oh."

"And I was wondering when you are going to get a tattoo of my name on you!" I said jokingly.

"That would be my first tattoo!" She freaked.

"It doesn't have to be as bold as mine," I countered.

"Well, I guess I'll think about it, but it has to be after the baby is born. I don't think it's a good idea to inject ink into my body with her in there!"

"Good point." I yawned.

"We should get some sleep. I want to see the sunrise tomorrow!"

"Okay. Good night. I love you." I leaned in and kissed her lips.

"I love you too."

 ***~*~*My Complicated Crush*~*~***

Cagalli and I both got up to watch the sunrise. I wouldn't mind waking up every morning to see it, but I don't know if she would feel the same way. I had my arm wrapped around her as we watched the sun rising from the beach.

"You've been quiet, is something wrong?" Cagalli turned her head to study me.

I took a deep breath. "I think we should live here."

"Van."

I interrupted her. "Look, I checked out some houses and they are affordable to rent! I'll find a job here while you stay at home and watch Amarra."

"I don't know…" She bit her lip.

"I promise things will work if we move here! When am I ever wrong?"

She snorted. "I can come up with a lot of things…"

"Come on, Cagalli. It's better for our daughter to be raised here than our apartment where college students drink and do drugs."

Cagalli grew silent as she focused her attention on the sun. "Fine, but I want you to find a job first before we move out, got it?"

"Yeah, sounds fair." I nodded.

I felt a smirk spreading across my face while we both stared at the sun. I will do anything in my power to make sure our family will live a perfect life. I know I can conquer anything with Cagalli by my side. I'll never let her be stressed or upset because I will always be there to make sure she has everything she wants and needs… She deserves it. I love her so much. Words can't describe how much I would do for her and our daughter.


	22. Epilogue

Epilogue

 *** "We got our back against the ocean. It's just us against the world. Looking at all or nothing, babe it's you and I." – Theory Of A Deadman –** ** _All Or Nothing_**

 **ONE YEAR LATER!**

"Sh, sh. It's okay," I tried to soothe Amarra, but she wouldn't stop crying… Man, she sure is a pain, but I couldn't help but admire her.

"Is she hungry?" Cagalli asked in concern.

"No, I already tried feeding her. I'm going to try and put her to sleep," I sighed while I walked into Amarra's little bedroom.

Cagalli and I moved to Destiny's Island right before Amarra was born, and trust me; it was the best decision we have ever made. I own my very own steakhouse here on the island, so we are making bank.

I thank Cagalli every day for making me finish school online. If it weren't for her, then I wouldn't have my own restaurant!

Anyways, I got Cagalli knocked up again, and she is five months pregnant with a boy! We are naming him Aiden. I hope he gets my wife's eyes since Amarra has mine, but we can tell that she will have blonde hair just like her mother's.

"Has she fallen asleep yet?" Cagalli asked as she entered the room.

"No, she's still crying." I rolled my eyes.

"Read her a story."

"Nah. I don't feel like it," I snorted.

"Fine, I'll do it." She sighed while she took Amarra away from my grasp. She then set our daughter in her crib.

"I'll read next time." I grinned.

Cagalli only glared at me while she picked a book off the shelf. She then sat next to the crib and began to read softly to our daughter. I watched her in awe. Cagalli is a stay at home mother because we both want our daughter to connect with her. We could've hired a nanny, but what's the point in having a child if you can't spend any time with them?

Cagalli is finishing school online even though I told her multiple of times that she has nothing to worry about. I want to be the only one supporting the family, but there's no stopping her.

She finally has a tattoo of my name on her wrist in light cursive. I told her she didn't have to do it, but she insisted. I'm not going to lie, but I'm happy she did end up getting my name on her body.

Axel and Roxas moved to Destiny's Island too, so they could work at my restaurant. They also attend college here while they live in one of the apartments on campus. I hope they don't get into the same mess as my wife and me when we lived together, but they get along fine, so I'm sure everything will be cool.

"Vanitas, can you get a bottle of milk for our daughter?" Cagalli paused her story and asked.

"Yeah." I walked out of the room to prepare formula milk for Amarra.

Cagalli and I haven't really seen a lot of people from our old college besides Sora and Kairi. They come to visit us once in awhile. Oh, and Sora and Kairi are getting married soon, even though they supposedly wanted to wait until after school. No surprise there, though.

I came into the room and handed my wife the milk. Cagalli immediately took it and picked our daughter up from her crib to feed her.

My wife and I haven't heard from my crazy ex or those other bitches I used to mess with, thank God. The only other person I talk to here and there is Seifer, but that's pretty much it. Cagalli will talk to Tifa even though I'm not comfortable with it since my wife met her through that douchebag, Zack. I guess Tifa and Cloud are finally together and moved out of Zack's to have their own place. We also found out Zack went back with his ex-girlfriend. I think her name is Aeris? I don't know and I don't give a shit…

"Vanitas, the baby kicked!" Cagalli whispered.

She knew I loved to feel her stomach when our son kicks her. I walked up to her and put my hands on her. I then gently smiled as I felt him kicking away.

"What sex do you want our next kid to be?" I curiously asked.

Cagalli looked at me with widened eyes. "We are taking a break, Van."

"How about we have one more then we'll take a break."

I wasn't kidding. I want ten kids with her. We have this argument every day about it, but I'm not giving up. I will make her bare eight more kids.

"No, Van."

"You said that after Amarra and look what happened," I smirked.

"Because you did it on purpose," she whined.

"Awe, come on! Don't you want more little you's and me's?" I asked teasingly.

"I don't think this world could handle it." She chuckled.

I took our daughter out of my wife's grasp, so I can feed her now. I could never get tired of looking at Amarra. It's crazy how much she looks like my wife and I… I could not ask for a better life, and it's all thanks to Cagalli, Amarra, and Aiden, too.


End file.
